After my un-DF'ing, I have sent a letter to everyone in my hall.

by kwintestal 94 Replies latest jw experiences

  • kwintestal
    kwintestal

    In the final installment of my story, I am done with my local congregation now. In the past month, I have been DF'd, un-DF'd attended a meeting where I shook everyones hand and smiled ... and now I have sent everyone in the hall this letter, roughly 60 addresses:

    OPEN LETTER TO THE NORTH CONGREGATION OF JEHOVAH’S WITNESSES

    Dear member of the North Congregation of Halifax, NS,

    As a member of this congregation, I am writing you in an attempt to make changes regarding how the Christian Congregation of Jehovah’s Witnesses handles matters regarding child sexual abuse. I am writing this, not in an attempt divide the congregation, but to protect the children within it.

    As a child, I was sexually molested by a congregation member. No, it was not within this congregation, however, as you and I know, congregational policy and procedure is directed from the same source for all congregations, therefore all congregations have the same, or similar policies regarding this matter. Because I was the only witness to the event, and because as a 12 year old child I would have been required to make my accusation face-to-face to my abuser (which I was unwilling to do at the time) no action was taken against my abuser, and he is still an active member in his congregation today. Despite mandatory reporting laws in Ontario, the elders that took my accusation didn’t report my abuse to the authorities. No one will know about the accusations that I made against him, not even his wife, so as to protect their own children. The last time I saw my abuser, was 6 years ago at a congregation picnic, playing with young children. Who is playing with your children? I personally know 5 other Jehovah’s Witnesses who have experiences identical to mine. How widespread is this problem? Across Canada and the US, there are too many accounts that have been made public to count, however please look at www.silentlambs.org for more information regarding how big of a problem this actually is.

    The problem with pedophiles in the congregation is the reason that my wife is no longer willing to be associated with Jehovah’s Witness and why I will refuse to bring my children to a Kingdom Hall. They must be protected, and I am not confident that they will be at the Kingdom Hall, or at social functions with other Jehovah’s Witnesses.

    You may ask, “Why am I receiving this letter? What does Sean want me to do about it?” Well, that is a very good question. First and foremost, talk about the situation with others. That’s the only real way for this problem to be fixed, and for you to educate yourself on how widespread the problem actually is. Second, write a letter to the Watch Tower Society to request clarification by means of a public written publication, that specifically tells its readers to go to the police first with any matters relating to sexual abuse of children. Elders are untrained volunteers, who do not know how to properly investigate charges of sexual abuse. Also, going to the elders first may result in the destruction of DNA, perhaps ruining the only evidence that the police could use to prosecute a pedophile. If the pedophile repents, and the congregation forgives a pedophile, then that’s great, however let these “brothers” serve time in prison too! That’s part of repentance.

    Thank you for your understanding regarding this important issue.

    Sean Polden

    I'm done with the local group now. I've made the elders feel like asses in front of the hall and now have let everyone know where I and my family stand. It feels good to leave on my own terms.

    Kwin

  • kittyeatzjdubs
    kittyeatzjdubs

    u go sean!

    u've got more 's than me.

    awesome

    luv, jojo

  • Finally-Free
    Finally-Free

    Great letter!

    You're not "bashing" the society or attempting to cause divisions. You are proposing a reasonable course of action. It should make some people think.

    You will probably be re-disfellowshipped for this, but that could make some people think too.

    W

  • rebel8
    rebel8

    Nothing in this letter can be construed to indicate you are DAing yourself, just that you don't feel safe bringing your family to the KH. I wonder what they will do--DA you or leave you alone. Not that it matters much.

    going to the elders first may result in the destruction of DNA, perhaps ruining the only evidence that the police could use to prosecute a pedophile

    Very good point--one I hadn't thought about before. I will use that the next time a JW emails me saying the child abuse policy is a good one. (I have been getting them ever since I started the Fark.com thread. Talk about a lot of circular reasoning--it is almost too much to believe.)

  • skinnyboy
    skinnyboy

    way to go, how empowering. It seems its more prevalent then before, or more talked about. Speaking to my mother back in the UK recently, a brother whom i always suspected had been convicted of peadophile activites with his own daughter, yet had gotten away with it for so long due to negligence by the body of elders in that congregation.

    I hope your find the strength to break free, like we all did, from the chains of the Society.

    peace!

  • ButtLight
    ButtLight

    Wow! Good job! So, how long before they df you this time?

  • tijkmo
    tijkmo

    the thing about this letter is that if i received it from somebody i knew i would at least read it ...it may not have an immediate effect but it may get some people thinking and in any walk of life thats a good first step

  • zen nudist
    zen nudist
    Nothing in this letter can be construed to indicate you are DAing yourself, just that you don't feel safe bringing your family to the KH. I wonder what they will do--DA you or leave you alone. Not that it matters much.

    I disagree, from what I read, he is telling them that he is pretty sure that there is NO spirit of Jehovah as advertised, protecting his or any other congregation which amounts to saying that he believes JWs are not the chosen ones or that there is no god at all.... either way that can be construed as DA-ing

  • Finally-Free
    Finally-Free
    I disagree, from what I read, he is telling them that he is pretty sure that there is NO spirit of Jehovah as advertised, protecting his or any other congregation which amounts to saying that he believes JWs are not the chosen ones or that there is no god at all.... either way that can be construed as DA-ing

    I think the fact that molestations are taking place at all is sufficient evidence to prove that Jehovah's Spirit, if present, is unwilling or unable to protect anyone. Besides, don't the JWs teach that Jehovah withdraws his spirit if serious wrongdoing occurs?

    W

  • Mulan
    Mulan

    Great letter, but it will be construed as "causing divisions" which is a df'ing offense.

    Good job, anyway.

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