Did being a witness make you lose your social skills?

AK - Jeff

I am out of the borg now about two years - but can say that I still have no social group in my life to replace them. I participate in several activities that I consider social in nature - this board as example. I have some 'acquaintances', but no real social structure in my life. I have my immediate family - my wife and grandchildren are big parts of my life - for which I thank God daily.

While witnesses we could always count on 'ready made' friends - you could move to a new congregation 1000 miles away and in a week you were forming bonds with people of like thinking.

It just seems that the isolationistic nature of the organization has created a fear of social contact with others. I have not gotten past it entirley. I am healing - thanx to all of you - and this is not a cry for help - I am fine. But have others here felt a keen inability to know where to start in creating a new life for oneself outside of the 'truth'?

I have found it particulary difficult due to now being 50 years old - can't just see myself heading out to the bars and clubs at my age.

Comments?

Jeff

Legolas

What about joining some sports team! Curling, golf, tennis, or just finding a group of people your own age to play cards with!

Legolas

What about joining some sports team! Curling, golf, tennis, or just finding a group of people your own age to play cards with!

defd

To be honest ak i do not think it is "the isolationistic nature of the organization has created a fear of social contact with others." that has caused you not to be able to reach out to the world or as you said "I have found it particulary difficult due to now being 50 years old - can't just see myself heading out to the bars and clubs at my age." I think it is the Princibles you have learned from the bible by means of Gods people that you have held on to that is the culprit. I personally think that is a good thing.

AK - Jeff

I think it is the Princibles you have learned from the bible by means of Gods people that you have held on to that is the culprit. I personally think that is a good thing.

Agreed. That is, that the Bible's priciples have directed my life till this point and I have never allowed that to change. It was the thought that the Bible was the basis of the organization that I became a witness - and now that I am a Christian I am glad for the elementary level education that I got with the 'truth'.

I too, think it is a good thing in that respect. I am what I am due to a lifetime of witness infuences. No bars are in my future.

What about joining some sports team! Curling, golf, tennis, or just finding a group of people your own age to play cards with!

Legolas - I do have some association with others in some of the areas you suggest. What I am really talking about is the effect of the organizational approach to socialization and how it affects us when we finally see the 'truth about the truth'. I really didn't want the tread to turn into a clinic in my behalf - just a discussion on the social implications of redirecting ones' life socially post-watchtower. Thanx though, for the kind thoughts. Aprreciated. Jeff

trevor

AK - Jeff

My big brother is 52 and has, for many years, belonged to a motorbike club. They go off at weekends and have been all over Europe. He has made many friends. Some have given up biking but stayed friends.

I am not suggesting that you become ‘a ton up boy’ but the idea of belonging to a club where people share similar interests could be a way forward?

………………………….

blondie

I just looked around and saw where non-JWs formed their friendships.

Of course, family is one. Try recontacting non-JW relatives

2. Neighbors

3. Parents of the children your kids go to school with/play with.

4. Get involved in school activities, PTA, etc.

5. Volunteer--pick your interest

6. Join a club--pick your interest

7. People you work with--get more involved in social activities, take the lead in organizing someting

8. Get the idea. Non-JWs have to get involved and reach out. There are many of them too that find it hard.

Blondie

carla

I think my husband is in fact losing certain social skills. We went to a family type party and he seemed a bit standoffish (is that a word?) This was people he has known almost his entire life. And dfed, there was no immorality going on, these are all good people. With high standards and family values. It just appeared he was unable to connect on a certain level. Family members have noticed this as well. Not always just sometimes. The borg changes people and not for the better. Best we can do is let people know the damage the org inflicts on people. Spiritually and in day to day life.

OldSoul

You mean, if I hadn't been born into it I might have developed "social skills?" What are these "social skills" of which you speak, they sound painful. Is it something that happens during puberty, like zits?

OldSoul

daystar

Yah-duh!

Did being a witness make you lose your social skills?

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