Is being an ex-dub one of your hobbies? You know, like remote controlled cars or HAM radio? I mean, come on, your brain is just filled with all of this useless knowledge... You've got to do something with it! If you think a Friday night well spent is chatting online with the only other people who know what 607 B.C.E. means, or why back-issues placed in laundromats are important, you might be a TOWER-HEAD.
It's okay. There are a million of us out there. And, our numbers are growing, thanks to the miracle of the Internet and elders who are willing to kick us out for smoking cigarrettes, having a Christmas tree, or even worse, thinking for ourselves! Still sulty about losing your family and friends? Don't worry! Most of us TOWER-HEADS are just as disillusioned and cynical. We need an audience and some goddamn commeradery. Hi. I'm the Professor. And, if you're like me and a million other sorry saps who have unwittingly devoted a good portion of their lives filling their heads with theocracy, anti-types, and false pophecies, you are now at home here on Simon's Board, where the true spirit of APOSTASY is alive and thriving. What's that? You think you're evil for being an apostate? Don't worry. Just call yourself a TOWER-HEAD instead and the Holy Spirit will forgive you. Or, I mean Jesus and Jehovah will forgive you for sinning against the Spirit (Which we all know is not a person at all, but is instead God's Active force.) In the end, you'll find, that the TOWER-HEADS are forgiven, cuz you're just online saying this stuff. Once you start picketing District Conventions and flyering JW cars with embarrassing quotes from the Watchtower, then you're an APOSTATE, and you are certainly screwed.
TOWER-HEADS UNITE! 2005!