Did your relationship change with your partner when you left.........

vitty

...........well what more can I add, only to say mine got fantastically better!!!!!!!!!

Ive been married for 24 years, I went back in the org 4 years after I was married, It has put so much strain on us over the years, its undescribeable. My husband came in the org, about 6 years after me.

When I was going by myself with the kids when they where small, I used to dream about how fantastic it would be if my husband came in the truth and we could do it together. He did and became a servant, but it was hell.

The absolute strain on our family became incredible and when he wanted out, I nearly left him.

I finally came to my senses and left the org with him.

Things could not be better, We listen to each other instead of thinking "Hes not taking the lead, or shes not doing her role"

So tell me your experiences --------------------------

vitty

lonelysheep

Yes, for the worse, and he's never been religious.

I realized how much time I wasted thinking my dubness could change him into some "pseudo-perfect husband for me" instead of seeing things for what they really are. I no longer believe in being "stuck in a loveless marriage", let alone feel they've got the "secrets to family happiness."

garybuss

My relationship changed when I began my journey of recovery and I put a stop to fractional shunning, innuendos, and aggressive behavior by Witnesses. I had been a door mat for the Witnesses and they didn't like it when I changed that format. The whole Witness experience was a stressful, discouraging experience. My mistake was enabling it to continue way past any reasonable time limit. You can't have abuse without an abusee.

tetrapod.sapien

i try to be nice and loving, but my wife is married to jehovah, not to me. and so, after five years, it's on the fritz. she told me the other day after one of her meetings that she thought it would be good if we separate. and at this point, after really wondering how she can say she loves me but that i will also be destroyed shortly by her real husband, jehovah, that perhaps it is a good idea to split up. plus, believe me when i say, that an atheist and a JW really do not have much meaningful fodder for conversation.

so yes, it did change with my partner when i left.

life sucks sometimes.

ts

LittleToe

Mine went down the tubes.

I spoke as little as possible about anything anti-JW (though I have to confess that on the rare occasions that she brought anything up, I could hardly stand there mute). I continued to support her in her Pioneering and never once impeded that or her meetings and assemblies. I didn't even ask a prayer over meals, due to her wishes.

Basically I bent backwards until my back began to break, and then some.

Two years later (or at least it will be a week tomorrow) I can finally apply for a divorce, though if she contests it I have a further three years to wait, unless the new Scottish divorce bill comes through.

ballistic

Sheesh Little Toe, I didn't realise divorce law was so different in Scotland from England.

Lady Lee

Did your relationship change with your partner when you left.........

yeah You could say it changed.

I divorced him

gumby

Everything works back-arsewards for me. I left the dubs and my wife did not........and we have gotten along better in our marriage ever since......go figure. I....like LittleToe, didn't give my wife a bad time over the witnesses except on a few occations when I first exited. I became myself when I left and didn't pretend over many things any longer .....so I feel she likes the' for real' apostate bastard, better than the dub who lived in a make believe world. I was lucky

Gumby

damselfly

Tetra I am so sorry you are going thru that right now.

I left the JW's for a non Jw . He didn't understand where I had come from and it was a huge source of conflict as he couldn't understand why I was the way I am. I'm glad to be out of that relationship.

Dams

Did your relationship change with your partner when you left.........

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