Embarrassing things that happened to you on the platform?

by Jordan 31 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Soledad

  It wasn't an embarrassing moment but it was one that pissed me off.

  One of the ministry school segments had a demonstration. Me, my mother and my brother were picked to do the demonstration, I think it had something to do with divided families. My mother was to conduct a study but was having difficulty because she had a non-believing mate. So an elder steps in and saves the day.

  I was ticked for two reasons:

  1. it was so far from the truth of our situation. no elder EVER came by our house to offer a family study. and if he had, none of the fabulous points brought up during the demonstration would have been good enough for me. I wrote in another thread that during the family study was when I dug up all the Watchtower dirt and demanded explanations for them. This elder (or any elder) in our congregation would not have been able to handle it!
  2. my mother, always so overanxious and ever so eager to be the elder's butt kisser, would shove the microphone in my face even when it wasn't my turn to speak. at one point she shoved it so hard and my face wasn't so far away from her hand she hit my upper lip and made it bleed. I got pissed and yelled "dammit!" really loud.
• 

  Soledad

  Jordan why in the world were you giving a talk while in crutches?!
• 

  GoingGoingGone

  My sister (a year younger than me) and I were often assigned to give talks together. My sister was always able to make me laugh, while she remained calm as a cucumber... always got me in trouble. It never failed, she would always do something to start me giggling on stage and my mother would give me a disapproving look when the talk was over....

  I also remember a really embarrassing moment that happened when I was about 13 or 14 and new to pantyhose... I was visiting the ladies room, which was located in the back of the KH, right before the meeting started. I unwittingly tucked the hem of my dress into the top of my pantyhose, exposing my entire little panty-hosed butt, and strolled out into the hall just as the song was about to begin. I started down the aisle, feeling very grown up ... Fortunately, a kind-hearted sister grabbed me before I got too far and pointed out my 'wardrobe malfunction'....

  GGG (of the "I can't stand pantyhose" class)
• 

  Quentin

  Well lets see...a good friend who was the song leader in our KH talked me into taking his place one night as he had to leave early...after giving me about five minutes if instruction on which way to move the hands and so forth he left...when the time came I went to the front and did the "Walk Like An Egyptian"...I felt like such a dodo...when the meeting was done I was knocking people over getting out the door...fastest I'd ever left a KH...

  He was paying me back of course for the time, right after he got married, I went to the drug store with him and shilled for an item he needed. When the girl asked "how many" I said "give me a box"...he was numb with shock...watching him pay was like watching a slow motion segment of a Peckinpaw(sp?) movie...yup, it was pay back time...
• 

  Virgogirl

  Ha-ha, well, I remember when my little best friend, SH and I were "selected" (forced) to do a skit at the Circuit Ass-embly because we were elder's daughters and therefore, wonderful, spiritual little girl children. NOT. We planned our example setting outfits for months, trying them on over and over and rehearsing our lines. At last, we went on stage and... she didn't say her line right, in my opinion. Me:"You're not supposed to say that yet,silly!" Her: Yes I am! It's my turn! We changed it, you boob!" "No!" "Yeah!" A mother runs out from behind the curtains. "Girls! Girls, please!" We never got our train of thought back and strangely were never on an assembly program again.
• 

  ChrisVance

  Virgogirl, that's priceless!
• 

  Virgogirl

  Tee-hee, once we realized how mortified our parents were, we slinked to our seats. As I recall, an argument broke out, starting with hissing and whispering and we progressed to elbowing. She slugged my arm and thankfully, it was meal intermission so everybody filed out, the rows were empty and boy, did we get chewed!
• 

  Confession

  Once I was assigned the part of covering the material from the recent District Convention in the Service Meeting. It was to be thirty minutes, and I was to include two other brothers--Ministerial Servants--in a roundtable discussion. Our eighty-two-year-old P.O. was extremely strict about timing. The night before, we had a rehearsal in which I made clear how much time they would have. A minute long introduction, nine minutes for each day, and two minutes for a brief summary.

  Well, after the introduction, the first MS starts covering talk after talk of the first convention day, quoting nearly every scripture. When he gets past 11 minutes, I start sweating. I'm a young 30-year-old elder--and don't know what to do. I pass him a note that reads, "You're wayyy overtime. Gotta stop!" He just keeps going and going, quoting and quoting. I pass my next note: "PLEASE! WRAP IT UP!" When we reach 16 minutes, I begin to feel this nervousness welling up, and it comes out as laughter. The resulting fear from not being able to stop makes it even worse. It's not a constant howling laughter, but one that came in short bursts that were sudden and inappropriately intense. It was a bizarre train wreck.
• 

  Virgogirl

  Easily explained! Satan was controlling your microphone and causing you to have naughty inappropriate thoughts!
• 

  mjs mouse, ben

  new here, good to meet you all!.......I had the #4 talk in the ministry school that evening, my brother told me before the meeting that he was going to wait until the quietest moment during the talk and he was going to let out a ripper!, I told him he better not,he assured me he was just joking, anyway he did fart pretty darn loud and I started laughing right when I asked everyone to turn with me to scripture, couldnt stop laughing , had to abandon the talk, long story short, we both got the hec beaten out of us when we got home by my leather belt wielding, bible thumping mother, and oh by the way, she hit us with the buckle end of the belt, but it was worth it!