Posts by GoUnion

12

The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne

by Oubliette in

jw
friends

[warning: this post contains spoilers!].

i've been reading hawthorne's the scarlet letter.

it is really quite an interesting read for us ex- and soon-to-be-ex-jws, especially if you or a loved one has ever been dealt with judicially by the elders.. i love the way hawthorne portrays the main characters:.

GoUnion

I love to read but I must confess I have not done well with so many of the classics. Your post gives me motivation to rectify this mistake.

12

My Mother-in-law's half JW and Half Apostate funeral

by Roberta804 in

her funeral was at 1pm today.

they held it at a vfw hall where the service was upstairs and a meal downstairs.

we all brought dishes to pass, so much food!

GoUnion

I am truly sorry for your loss and I admire your perspective on the events of the funeral.

i have an unrelated question for you though, do you take in baby raccoons? Do people bring them to you? I think that is wonderful for you to care for them but how do you handle them as they get older and more curious I know raccoons can get into pretty much anything they want too.

41

Discussion with some elders

by GoUnion in

hello everyone just wanted to relate a situation that occurred a few days ago.

so i have quit going to meetings for a few months now based on some issues i have with the explanations of current doctrines.

my wife is none too happy with this but over the last few months we have had some date nights and have tentitively agreed to disagree.

GoUnion

Oubliette

You might try getting your wife to think about this, "Why does she feel the need to tell the elders about your personal thoughts and private discussions? What does this mean about your relationship? What does this say about the religion?"

That being said, tread lightly and proceed cautiously.

So THEY can influence your wife, but YOU cannot!

Few things shout, "Cult!" as loudly as behavior like this.

The only thing more ridiculous than the notion that anyone thinks they have the right to tell another adult WHO they can and cannot talk to and WHAT they can and cannot discuss is that anyone goes along with it.

Well I have been thinking long and hard as to this post. It is amazing to me how normal people such as Oubliette will view this situation, (normal in the respect they are not active JWs, no disrespect meant) and yet in regards to myself, these thoughts really never occured in my mind. Apparently a submissive attitude is still deeply engrained in my subconscious. During the course of my discussion with these elders I truly believe they felt that they were allowing me to have my own thinking, not realizing that by limiting a discussion between adults, that stifles a discussion that could truly help individuals grow. I am thankful for all the responses at this board it has really been a boost to see so many heartfelt, honest replies, even though im sure many of us have our own individual opinions in regards to the WT organization.

This takes me too my next question for many of the members here. I know from reading many of the posts here that many people here truly view the WT as a potentially damaging organization to many people, and while it is true their policies have been shown to harm many people, I personally do not hold the view that much of the leadership is inherently evil, or has some plot to make millions. From my lifetime in the organization I think most people genuinely want to serve God and life a good life. To me it seems as if the organization and the policies/doctrines that have developed, have become not some Biblical truth, but their own entity so to speak, forcing regular people to toe-the-line to established traditions. I say this because if I am disfellowshipped someday(a prospect that will have little effect on my life), based upon entire history with many different elders and serving as a pioneer and m.s., I believe the elders truly think they will be serving God, and possibly even "helping" me in some twisted way.

So what is the question then I was supposed to ask, do you view this organization, an organization with which you know doubt had many close friends because of, do you think this organization is inherently evil? Perhaps evil evokes an image of intense malice, perhaps dangerous may be a better word? But please, I would love to hear your thoughts.

41

Discussion with some elders

by GoUnion in

hello everyone just wanted to relate a situation that occurred a few days ago.

so i have quit going to meetings for a few months now based on some issues i have with the explanations of current doctrines.

my wife is none too happy with this but over the last few months we have had some date nights and have tentitively agreed to disagree.

GoUnion

just a quick reply to those who are concerned about a possible jc or disfellowshipping, that is a realistic possibility that I have considered but I have very little interactions with most Jws right now, it is something I am not afraid of. I would find it much more satisfying to confront the issues we all face and contemplate with an open mind and an honest outlook at all times. If that means I am asked to explain my thinking to 2 elders or 3 I will for the sake of discussion. a jc has no real effect on my life.

oubliette thank you for your perspective, I won't say I agree 100% yet, but I will contemplate your post and hopefully I can give a more detailed reply later.

6

Discussion with some elders

by GoUnion in

hello everyone just wanted to relate a situation that occurred a few days ago.

so i have quit going to meetings for a few months now based on some issues i have with the explanations of current doctrines.

my wife is none to .

GoUnion

Sorry I hate posting on an iPhone could this thread be deleted? Lol

41

Discussion with some elders

by GoUnion in

hello everyone just wanted to relate a situation that occurred a few days ago.

so i have quit going to meetings for a few months now based on some issues i have with the explanations of current doctrines.

my wife is none too happy with this but over the last few months we have had some date nights and have tentitively agreed to disagree.

GoUnion

Hello everyone just wanted to relate a situation that occurred a few days ago. So I have quit going to meetings for a few months now based on some issues I have with the explanations of current doctrines. My wife is none too happy with this but over the last few months we have had some date nights and have tentitively agreed to disagree. When I bought CoC I told her what I was reading and explained I would not try to sway her opinion. I know she has some of her own disagreements but I am a firm believer in everyone making their own decisions at their own time.

Before I told her this over the last year I have had several discussions with one or two elders about my concerns which I have enjoyed. I try to be honest at all times in expressing my concerns over inaccuracies and the effects these can have on people. The elders were obviously concerned but were never rude nor have I felt like they were defensive they merely try to highlight the aspect that JWs can only be the organization that is used.

When I told my wife that I read CoC she told me she felt like she needed to tell the elders I was being influenced by apostate information, again she was not angry nor did we get into an argument. I told her if that is how she felt that's fine I am not one to try and hide anything. Well I met with the elders and I was surprised at the plesantness of our meeting at a coffee shop. my line of reasoning to them was I can think for myself, when making decisions it's important to see both sides of an agrument. the general vibe I got from our discussion was my thoughts and disagreemets are fine, but influencing my wife and others would cross a line.

im not sure how I feel about all of this I don't think it's an intrusion on my life because if my wife wants to talk we will, she is not ready for that at this time. I also am not angry with the elders because we talked a Lot and I feel like any kind of a discussoon about life and what our purpose is is beneficial. Im just curious on your thoughts.

6

Discussion with some elders

by GoUnion in

hello everyone just wanted to relate a situation that occurred a few days ago.

so i have quit going to meetings for a few months now based on some issues i have with the explanations of current doctrines.

my wife is none to .

GoUnion

Hello everyone just wanted to relate a situation that occurred a few days ago. So I have quit going to meetings for a few months now based on some issues I have with the explanations of current doctrines. My wife is none to

94

Avoid Going back to the JW's - Educate Yourself about Mind Control

by flipper in

jw
friends

i've talked with some good friends on the board about this before and we seem to be in agreement : one reason ( among many ) that some disfellowshipped jw's go back and return to the wt organization is because they are full of uneeded guilt or uneeded fear because they haven't educated themselves about how the wt society uses mind control tactics to deceive them into thinking they have " nowhere else to go " .

i understand that some dfed ones may go back to the organization for family and friends- however- it's an exrecise in futility because once you learn the truth about the truth you cannot undo what you heard.

so some may just go back and live a fake jw life to appease family- but just think of how that can damage a person's emotional and mental health playing the fake jw game the rest of their lives !

GoUnion

Coming from someone born in, it is not easy to leave some of your longtime friends, or to have them leave you I should say. Religous differences should not break up friendships and families, but because of strict, interpretations of the scriptures this is happening. I have been away for a few months but have found myself lonely several times, and at these moments I have thought about attending the meetings. The feeling of isolation however is intended and encouraged by the powers that be. When I contemplate this fact that tends to discourage me from attending for social reasons.

45

Hello

by GoUnion in

jw
friends

hello everyone it's nice to finally be able to post i had trouble getting emails last month and was never able to sign up.

this has been a very informative site which has really helped me grow and to think for myself.

please allow me to introduce myself.. i was born into a witness family and was baptized at a young age an was part of a small kingdom hall.

GoUnion

Sorry for the delay my line of work is tied to the weather and I have been working a ton.

Thank you all for the warm welcome it is nice not to feel isolated, which is what happens to an individual when they decide not to attend meetings.

Several have asked about my wife, she does not support my thinking but over the last few months we have agreed not to discuss doctrine/religion and instead have focused on enjoying each other's company. I think many here will agree it is not the ideal situation, but we do get along despite the differences and we still have a lot of laughs together. I will never force my ideas on my wife. We may disagree with what the witnesses do, but I think by being forthright, honest, and patient we can meet somewhere halfway. we shall see.

someone else asked me about the wt about elders and the sentence about human logic. I don't have my PC right now i can't remember the quote exactly but I remember reading with it and disagreeing win it. I seem to remember a scripture telling us not to put our trust in nobles. the idea that a group of men will require our complete obedience in order to please god makes me uncomfortable. what if they are wrong? this again brings me back to the idea that if good intentions is all that matters, then it applies to all people not just witnesses.

again sorry for the delay I hope to have an opportunity to talk again soon, take care everyone.

45

Hello

by GoUnion in

jw
friends

hello everyone it's nice to finally be able to post i had trouble getting emails last month and was never able to sign up.

this has been a very informative site which has really helped me grow and to think for myself.

please allow me to introduce myself.. i was born into a witness family and was baptized at a young age an was part of a small kingdom hall.

GoUnion

Hello everyone it's nice to finally be able to post I had trouble getting emails last month and was never able to sign up. This has been a very informative site which has really helped me grow and to think for myself. Please allow me to introduce myself.

i was born into a witness family and was baptized at a young age an was part of a small Kingdom Hall. In high school I led a double life because I always got along with my friends in school and liked to party. When school was over i had no desire to attend college so I became an apprentice electrician. I dont know if I would have made a different choice as a non jw, i believe it is true that college is not for anyone. when I moved out of my parents home I realized I needed to make the truth my own so I started pioneering while working full time. That only lasted a year but I went to pioneer school which helped me appreciate spiritual study.

during this time I started dating a wonderful girl and was able to be completely open with her with all my past sins. We dated several years and we married in 2008, shortly thereafter I was appointed as a ministerial servant. This was an exciting time for me I did my best to study and keep up with my responsibilities. I was able to give public talks at surrounding halls and I enjoyed the deep study to really understand my outlines.

later on I was offered a job in pipeline construction so my wife and I moved. this has proven to be wonderful for us I have been working steadily for 4 years making more then most college graduates not too bad for a construction worker. It was in the last year and a half in our new hall that I started to feel like something was not right.

our hall was just dull, service was dull, singing was dull. It seemed as if there was no life, people attended just to go through the motions. In our 3 years there we were always referre to as the new people, never invited to do much even though I was an active m.s. I started going to meetings just merely to be seen, never feeling refreshed. Then one evening my parents mentioned the july 15 wt and the new understandings. I read this right away and was instantly troubled, why would Jehovah reveal this now? Why not 40 years ago? Then it hit me hard, he didnt reveal anything progressively, it's just what they think right now. The conclusions reached in that magazine made no sense to me why would the FDS be appointed over domestics and then the belongings which are made up of themselves and other annointed, not to mention the annointed are supposed to kings and priests with them. This interpretation has no backing in scriptures. This conclusion had profound meaning to me, I realized the bible can be interpreted in different ways. One idea may be right but could later be wrong. since this is the case how can jw's condemn religions for their erroneous teachings when their teachings could change as well.

If god accepts individuals spreading incorrect ideas, then truly it is their heart condition that matters to him, however could that not then apply to every human on earth regardless of their religion or beliefs? when i understood these ideas I found myself unable to engage in the ministry and stepped down as a servant.

i started researching online about the watchtower and have learned much. I recently purchased crisis of conscience, and it is a powerful book indeed. I know it's the foremost apostate book but the books tone of sadness, humility, and honesty was nothing I expected from the "selfish apostates". This site has contained excellent life stories, opinions, and links that have really helped me as well. I am unable to write down what I believe right now, I don't know what that will turn out to be, but I believe the process itself to figure out lifes answers is worth it in itself. I do not agree that you must avoid material that challenges your beliefs, we need to challenge ourselves to find out is true in our lives.

this turned out to be longer then I meant, but thank you for the opportunity to talk.