I used to have similar panics and fears, and didn't have nearly as many years to unpick/unlearn. One thing that really helped me was to actively disprove everything I'd been taught to believe was true. Once you can work out they aren't right then they can't be right about the end of the system either. It takes time and effort to unprogramme the lies, but it's possible. Good luck.
gonzobear
JoinedPosts by gonzobear
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52
last convention before global attack on witnesses
by Phoebe inso it's not enough that i'm dealing with post traumatic stress/anxiety and panic attacks all related to my life as a jw (50 years baptized -- i stopped going a couple of months ago) at 3 a.m. i get an email from the other side of the world.
'you have to go to the convention.
bro sanderson says we must watch the news, things are happening.
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Latest News on Charity Commission Investigation into WTBTS
by gonzobear inthis has just been published on the government's website regarding the charity commission's investigation into wtbts in the uk.
it sounds a little like a backward step, and also like the society are playing clever legal games - as to be expected - but hopefully the information provided by people who've left and been affected by the society will help them reach an informed conclusion.
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gonzobear
Hopefully this is the case. When I last spoke to them they were hoping that by keeping the WT a registered charity it would help them to monitor them and safeguard children to the extent they could. I know recently the society changed their policy on reporting sexual abuse, but it still felt a little like lip service and doing to because they had to to comply with the commission's requirements.
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Latest News on Charity Commission Investigation into WTBTS
by gonzobear inthis has just been published on the government's website regarding the charity commission's investigation into wtbts in the uk.
it sounds a little like a backward step, and also like the society are playing clever legal games - as to be expected - but hopefully the information provided by people who've left and been affected by the society will help them reach an informed conclusion.
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gonzobear
This has just been published on the government's website regarding the Charity Commission's investigation into WTBTS in the UK. It sounds a little like a backward step, and also like the society are playing clever legal games - as to be expected - but hopefully the information provided by people who've left and been affected by the society will help them reach an informed conclusion.
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Jehovah God is Real
by TakeOffTheCrown inthere are many on this site that do not believe that jehovah truly exists; that he is not a real being.
but, he is as real as next breath you draw into your nostrils.. some of you say that there is no evidence that he exists.
yet, none of you can prove that he does not exits.. cofty, (you come to mind), i appreciate that you have stated, without reservation, that you do not believe that god exists.. yet, you cannot prove it.. hope in jehovah..
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gonzobear
If you cannot prove God doesn't exist, then by extension of the same logic, you can't prove he does exist. Caught in this state of uncertainty, unable to either prove or disprove - although I believe there's far more evidence God doesn't exist than does - all we are left with is choice, the choice to choose to follow a God who largely seems to be a fiction varying between religions, with varying degrees of severity, or to not follow God. I chose and would make the same choice time and time again, not to follow the God of the witnesses, in good conscience I couldn't follow a God that harsh and severe who distorts the idea of all godly qualities beyond recognition. Nor would I want to follow a religion who have disseminated the bible in the way they have.
I believe all Gods were invented by early humans as a way to explain things they didn't understand, but science and knowledge easy replace these early ideas, and so now, there is no need for God.
Whilst you might feel you've put burs under seats, there's certainly not one under mine.
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HELP needed from folks in UK, esp. in Scotland!
by WTS Archive intl;dr: if you live either in scotland or in other parts of uk and you don't mind traveling, you might be able to help a fellow ex-jw by being present during a courtcase where she alone has to face more than two dozens of jws who have ruined their business.
please contact me directly for details on when and where the court case will be held (i will know these details in few days probably).
ps.
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gonzobear
They obviously have differently bible trained consciences to that of my ex-husband who just tried to take me to court over access arrangements with my daughter, he did take me, but I didn't contest the motion, but he's a witness as are his family who submitted affidavits.
Surely this is a matter of employment law? Did the witnesses employed have contracts, you can't just not turn up for work.
Even a link to the trial date and what court it's in - those should be on the court of sessions' website - would help.
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Publisher death nail.
by Chook ini have done this exactly as quoted more than once.
i ask elder if it's better to hide serious sin or reveal, of course we know the answer.
then i ask them to explain elders book page 38 paragraph 19, which say it's sometimes ok for elder who has committed immorality and has kept it secret to continue serving as elder.
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gonzobear
Sorry, this 'e. For example, the sin may involve past child abuse, and this would likely disqualify him for many years' - the language indicates that even a past sin of child abuse wouldn't necessary exempt an elder from serving, only that it likely might. Wow. So much wrong with all of this. Does anyone know if the charity commission have seen this paragraph?
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BBC Radio Four Comedy Centering Around Leaving the Witnesses.
by gonzobear ini heard this on the radio last week and thought it was really powerful, amazingly radio four referred to the witnesses as a religious cult, which i thought was progress.
it's a strangely tough listen, i'm sure many of you have been through similar, i know i was, and to hear it presented as comedy seems to add an extra punch.
it's great to see true life stories gaining some media traction.
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gonzobear
I couldn't find it on here when I searched, thanks for the heads up. It was amazing, really brave for Radio Four too.
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Week 16 Since My Disfellowshipping - Update
by pale.emperor inhi guys.
i could really do with you advice regarding my current state since being disfellowshipped 16 weeks ago.. since being given the boot (i did try to fade but it failed) ive been on a rollacoaster of emotions.
lately im getting frequent headaches, tiredness and i have about 3 or 4 thoughts running through my mind at all times.. im passed the sadness phase of discovering it's a cult.
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gonzobear
I am so so sorry and sad to read what you're going through. As with all things this pain you feel WILL pass. I left when my daughter was 3, and it was terrifying. It's terrifying to be so alone. I faded and so had occasional contact with my mother - that's gone now she has branded me an apostate, and honestly, it's easier without her - but it was the worst time in my life. You are strong for leaving, and for seeing it as it is. Firstly, keep this knowledge you're strong close. You're loving for not rejoicing in other's pain. You're also seeing the good in others, seeing that people with true Christian values help others.
Your worries about your daughter - she will see them as they are. Your influence and experiences will open her eyes, she won't want to join them. She might be conflicted for a few years, and that's going to be a tough one. My daughter is now 11, and she detests the witnesses - her father is still in - she sees the hypocrisy and lack of love and has made her own conclusions. Kids are smart.
It does get better. Try and find ways to make new friends. I volunteered for a charity after I left and it changed my life, opened my eyes to the good in the world and helped build a new set of friends. Now my life is good, you'll get to that stage too, you just need to hang in and I know it'll be painful and awful at times, but you've done the hardest part and there are lots of people here who have your back as well.
There are lots of phases people go through, it's not dissimilar to post traumatic stress at times, and you've lost your family, so there will be the stages of grief too. I was numb, sad, angry, doubted myself, distrustful of others, but gradually have learnt to let it go, and in the main, it's ok now. You'll get there too.
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BBC Radio Four Comedy Centering Around Leaving the Witnesses.
by gonzobear ini heard this on the radio last week and thought it was really powerful, amazingly radio four referred to the witnesses as a religious cult, which i thought was progress.
it's a strangely tough listen, i'm sure many of you have been through similar, i know i was, and to hear it presented as comedy seems to add an extra punch.
it's great to see true life stories gaining some media traction.
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gonzobear
I heard this on the radio last week and thought it was really powerful, amazingly Radio Four referred to the Witnesses as a religious cult, which I thought was progress. It's a strangely tough listen, I'm sure many of you have been through similar, I know I was, and to hear it presented as comedy seems to add an extra punch. It's great to see true life stories gaining some media traction.
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Can’t cope with being disfellowshipped…..Need some advice
by xxBettyBoopxx inthis site is great, i have been lurking for a while now.
but i can’t get reinstated and have used some of the advice already given.. i was df’d many months ago and go to all the meetings and do all the preparation for the meetings, but the jc committee keep refusing me.
tomorrow at the clam meeting i am puting yet another letter in and will be called for another dreadful jc meeting.. 1. what can i say to the elders to show that i am truly repentant?.
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gonzobear
All of the above advice is very good. If you can try and sit tight for a while.
Ask yourself what love is. This is what the disfellowshipping arrangement claims to hang on. Ask, is it loving to cause you as much mental distress as you're currently undergoing? Is it loving to shun people at the drop of a hat, and to only show them conditional love. These are hard questions, and leaving IS hard, but you've done the hardest part already.
If you're experiencing really bad depression please go to your doctor, or call a helpline, leaving can cripple people, and the sooner you're able to talk to someone and to build new relationships with people who accept you for who you are the better. Opening up can be terrifying, but people tend to be sympathetic, and empathetic and surprised too at the way you're being treated. Talk, think and rest, and try to imagine a life away from the organisation. How do you want your life to look, what does a good life mean to you, what's your purpose? Ask these things, seek help from others outside, and slowly you can build a life for yourself outside of the witnesses. It's not easy, doesn't happen over night, but believe me, in years to come you'll look back and see how brave you are, and how strong you've been. So many people here have been through the same things.