OrphanCrow

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Posts by OrphanCrow

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  27

  Angry and scared

  by BlackWolf in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i feel like everything that comes out of my mothers mouth is something negative and cringe worthy.

  all she seems to talk about with me is how terrible and demonic our disfellowshipped relatives are, how horrible the world and holidays are, or how she is so much better and "holier than thou".

  it really makes me sick sometimes.

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  OrphanCrow

  BlackWolf: Every time they ask I just say that it's my own decision to make when I'm ready, and then my dad just says "well, when will you be ready?". It's really frustrating because if I try to actually talk to them about my doubts things will end badly like they did last time.

  Then don't talk to them about your doubts.

  Your parents want reassurances from you. I think they are fearful. Of what...who knows? It could be varied - fear that their baby won't make it to paradise...fear that they won't make it there if they aren't seen as good parents...

  Regardless, what you are doing/saying now isn't working. Maybe tell them, next time they ask about you getting baptized, that you are praying about it. And tell them not to worry about you so much because you know that Jehovah loves you anyways even if you haven't been dunked. Tell them that in your heart, and in your prayers, you know that Jehovah will tell you when the time is right. They won't be able to argue with Jehovah.
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  31

  Lunch today with.. JW step father....

  by raven in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  it has been a while since i've posted, i think its because i have finally gotten some peace and quiet as far as harassment from the jw elders.. my step father, the one who reported me to the elder police for a sinful act invited me to lunch today.. it has been almost a year since the incident, we have talked here and there, it has been just casual though.

  he says he is in town for work and asked if i would like to meet up for lunch, i couldn't think of any excuses so i agreed.. i hope it goes well, hope that we don't go into the jw nonsense.

  hope he doesn't bring elders with him, am i paranoid or what?

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  OrphanCrow

  raven: Yes yes I know.. I had(have?) some very bitter feelings towards him.. I just try to not think about it, it's in all honesty a very confusing situation.

  It is time you stopped ignoring your feelings. You should be bitter and you should be angry. There is nothing wrong with being angry when someone has treated you badly. Nothing at all - nurture your anger and make friends with it - know what it means and stop stuffing it down. It is your anger and you have earned it. Experience your anger, taste it, feel it and embrace it - be human. Anger won't destroy you - it will make you whole.

  The situation isn't really that confusing. You are too close to it to see how simple it really is. Distance yourself. Stop putting yourself back into that confusing situation. You need distance and time to process what has happened or you will find yourself, if not back in the same situation, in another one just like it. You need time to adjust your 'template' or that victim pattern will continue to plague you for the rest of your life.

  Good luck, Raven, and go find some good, kind, and honest people to hang out with. Life is short and it is a waste of time investing in relationships that are unhealthy for you.
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  31

  Lunch today with.. JW step father....

  by raven in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  it has been a while since i've posted, i think its because i have finally gotten some peace and quiet as far as harassment from the jw elders.. my step father, the one who reported me to the elder police for a sinful act invited me to lunch today.. it has been almost a year since the incident, we have talked here and there, it has been just casual though.

  he says he is in town for work and asked if i would like to meet up for lunch, i couldn't think of any excuses so i agreed.. i hope it goes well, hope that we don't go into the jw nonsense.

  hope he doesn't bring elders with him, am i paranoid or what?

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  OrphanCrow

  WC: This guy TURNED YOU IN TO THE ELDERS, like a snitch going to the Gestapo, and you are going to have lunch with him? WHY?

  Ooohhh. I missed that part.

  In that case, I totally agree with WingCommander.

  When a person shows you who they are, you should believe them. I didn't realize this is the jerk who gave you so much trouble, Raven. By going for lunch with your step-father, you are repeating past victim patterns.

  If you don't want to be a victim, you have to change your behavior. He won't - you have no indication that he has changed and any little thoughts you have about this being a warm and cuddly reuinion is simply wishful thinking on your part - exactly like a victim behaves.

  Don't want to be a victim anymore? Then stop thinking that someone, who has abused and mistreated you in the past, will change. "Oh...it will be better this time..."

  If you still desire to have a relationship with someone who has treated you so badly...then I guess you still have some life lessons to learn. Keep trying...it is hard to stand up for yourself when you don't realize how strong you actually are.

  You made your post looking for advice so here is my advice to you - make up an excuse that you are busy if he calls again and then go out and do something nice for yourself. With people who don't try to trap you back into their deceitful lifestyle.

  You will remain a victim as long as you keep acting like one. Going for lunch with this guy is victim behavior.
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  13

  Banned From The Kingdom Hall

  by darkspilver in

  1. watchtower
  2. scandals

  banned from going to the kingdom hall..... a former jehovah’s witness has been banned from visiting any of the organisation’s kingdom halls in the uk – or face going to jail.. http://www.kentonline.co.uk/deal/news/judges-jail-warning-to-former-117012/.

  previous thread / discussion.

  youtube channel.

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  OrphanCrow

  Yes, it was inappropriate behavior. And an example of the rage and hurt that an ex- member can feel when they are disfellowshipped.

  "...going to the man’s house to post leaflets through his letterbox."

  Geez, I wonder where he learned how to do that?
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  29

  JW's arrogant as f...?!

  by Alostpuppydog in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  has anybody else noticed that almost all the jdubs are super arrogant?

  i mean even from just the basic ones to especially the elders and the overseers omg.

  they act like they are so high and mighty that you should just worship them.

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  OrphanCrow

  Yes, the majority of JWs who I have interacted with have definitely been arrogant.

  I don't know if that is just a quality that the Org is responsible for implanting in its members or if that quality is something that attracts the members. Probably both.

  The doctrine and structure of the JW religion is all about elitism. The higher you go up the food chain, the more elite you become. Until you can drink the blood of Christ and join in his lofty perch. And the lowly members, the ones who are merely of the worker class with no special privilege, usually act out their elitism by kicking the dog - the worldly ones.

  It has made me cringe when I have heard JW elders, with a grade school education, make derisive comments towards people who are educated professionals. I was working at a hotel desk one day when a herd of JWs came in. There was a newspaper with a headline about a judge on the front page that was lying on the desk. A fat elder, who I know didn't graduate high school, picked the paper up, read the headline and snorted, "Huh! Why would he want a raise? What is so hard about judging?" Snort snort and a big laugh. It took all my strength not to reach across that desk and slap him. I kept my mouth shut (one of the rare times) but I so wanted to tell him what a judge has for education and what kind of knowledge base he would have because of his years and years of studying and work. That elder had no business making fun of someone who could run rings around him as far as knowledge of the law goes.

  Many times I have heard JWs poke fun at people who are educated and professional. Or better dressed than they are, or just not like them. If a person isn't a JW - they automatically belong to the scorn class.

  The scorn of the elite. The arrogance of the elite. I have seen, heard and felt it many times. It isn't pretty.
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  31

  Lunch today with.. JW step father....

  by raven in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  it has been a while since i've posted, i think its because i have finally gotten some peace and quiet as far as harassment from the jw elders.. my step father, the one who reported me to the elder police for a sinful act invited me to lunch today.. it has been almost a year since the incident, we have talked here and there, it has been just casual though.

  he says he is in town for work and asked if i would like to meet up for lunch, i couldn't think of any excuses so i agreed.. i hope it goes well, hope that we don't go into the jw nonsense.

  hope he doesn't bring elders with him, am i paranoid or what?

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  OrphanCrow

  raven: I am sure you have had encounters with JW's since leaving.. How do you handle it?

  Well. That depends.

  It depends on my mood, who the JWs are, how old they are, if they have kids with them, if I am related to them, if it is raining, or if it is snowing. Or if I need new material for an art project. Lol!

  I am afraid that my responses to the JWs have varied from inviting them in for a chat and tea to screaming like a banshee at them. I think I have responded in almost every way possible - except physical altercation. I have never punched them

  It just depends :)

  I was rather proud of myself once. I had a woman from my childhood congregation call on me and I told her that when I had left the JWs at 13 years of age, that I pretty much knew as much about the Bible as she did right now. And she agreed with me.

  Then I said, "Well, after I left, I didn't stop studying the Bible. I read it for myself and I studied it from more than one church's perspective. And, when I went to university I studied it as well. From Jewish scholars. So, I am not going to engage in a Bible discussion with you because I like you and doing so would put you at a severe disadvantage. If you can ever come here and leave your Bible in the car, I would be happy to make a pot of tea and chat about how our lives have been - talk about our kids and stuff. But, you can't do that, can you?" She admitted that she couldn't do that and she left. But, every time we ran into each other around town, we would smile and say hello.

  How will I handle it next time? I have no clue. It will depend on the weather and if I am in a good mood or not.

  
  
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  31

  Lunch today with.. JW step father....

  by raven in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  it has been a while since i've posted, i think its because i have finally gotten some peace and quiet as far as harassment from the jw elders.. my step father, the one who reported me to the elder police for a sinful act invited me to lunch today.. it has been almost a year since the incident, we have talked here and there, it has been just casual though.

  he says he is in town for work and asked if i would like to meet up for lunch, i couldn't think of any excuses so i agreed.. i hope it goes well, hope that we don't go into the jw nonsense.

  hope he doesn't bring elders with him, am i paranoid or what?

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  OrphanCrow

  raven: Anyways, so it went well, maybe more lunch meet ups in the future?

  Of course it went well. Grooming is like that. Nice, nice...a little bit of JW stuff here and there...not too much the first time. Nice...nice...a little bit more...groom, groom, groom.

  I am glad your lunch went well. But don't be surprised when he starts to up the pressure. That is when the grooming will stop.

  Yes, I am cynical. It comes from having over 40 years experience dealing with the niceness of JW relatives. It only lasts so long...long enough for them to assuage their guilt about not being nice. Then, when you say no or resist their religious overtures...they can feel better. "See? It isn't me. I tried to be nice. It's them - those damn apostates"
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  36

  JW Ideal candidates for Life Insurance?

  by MNLifeAgent in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i am not a jehovah's witness, although i do respect your religion entirely.

  i am 27 years old, and live in minnesota.

  i have an older cousin, who's mother (not with my uncle -separated when my cousin was a baby) had been a witness, grew up in your word, and about 12 years ago she fully converted.

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  OrphanCrow

  MNLifeagent: I wasn't sure if finances were already addressed in excess.

  Lol! Those finances are addressed. Believe me, they are addressed already. Excessively.

  All excess money is to be given to JWorg. Including children's ice cream money.

  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8pL-LnqNyw
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  8

  WBATS = THE WIZARD OF OZ

  by UNCONDITIONAL LOVE in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i found this amusing and ironic, but in a nutshell.

  stay on the yellow brick road, do as we say and want, and we promise you courage, a heart, a brain and a ticket back home (spirtual paradise now/ physical paradise soon/ resurrection guaranteed )... .

  don't ask too many questions or look behind the big curtain, just believe us or you'll fall apart and die... (research or study on your own/internet/ researching the governing body leads to weakness and disfellowshipping).

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  OrphanCrow

  UL: Life imitates art?

  No. Art imitates life. That is why myth can be so believable.

  Personally, I like Chicken Little

  
  

  
  
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  45

  Special Talk During the Meeting Today About the Bad Press in Canada

  by RobertT18 in

  1. watchtower
  2. child-abuse

  i was invited to a congregation in ontario, canada today and as soon as the meeting opened the brother conducting the meeting said there was a very important statement coming from the borg.

  this talk replaced the two last parts of "living as a christian" section.

  he started reading a letter from the borg about how much they loved us.

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  OrphanCrow

  "- The media has decided to ignore all the material on JW.org regarding Child Abuse despite them telling to look into the articles, broadcasting and magazine articles about protecting the child(s) /members of the cong."

  They just don't get it, do they? Their frustration must be hitting the roof - "we say we do things this way, but nobody is believing us".

  The org is being judged on their actions, not by what they say they do. The tactic of saying one thing to the public but behaving differently behind closed doors isn't going to work this time.

  It is time for the org to walk the talk and they don't know how to do it. They have been lying for so long that they don't know how to tell the truth. They have no truth to tell.