Esmerelda,
Keep searching, keep knocking.
Remember those words?
Do you want to settle for an imperfect package of beliefs - having your conscience messed with as doctrine changes 'just like that'....
It's up to you...you know something? I'm prepared to have faith that a spiritual education from our own very God is not dependant on forced inculcation.
I've been a witness for a mere 25 years, I have joined in congregational prayers, thanking our God for 'new truths' - they weren't truths - they were false teachings - my religion - the 'one and only true religion' taught me these false teachings and insisted that I believe each one at that time - or else surely I'd be out of step with my God.
You have just started - take no notice of the actions of other witnesses in your congretion, it's just life - and these people are full of.....a culture of deceit and lies - please, take notice of the organisations method of teaching.