'They didn't ask t come in to the world'.......Oh my! How many times have I heard that?
My mum would often play the 'I carried you' for nine months line.....ad nausium.
One day my sister replied: 'You mean I had a choice?'.......Actually no one does.
We dont get to choose our kids either. They are not and we should not want copies of us.
Single parent here ( mum liked to 'entertain' in my absence and was rather too fond of the bottle ).
To achieve this heady goal was a rather easy matter of convincing a judge who, on looking at the evidence, not only gave me custody of my two but banned her from access without supervision....Enough said I think.
It still took a year and it cost me my 100K a year career. That was five years ago. My autistic son could not do hiis shoelaces back then....he now makes stop-motion films with my DSLR. My other son went from a poor performer at school to top level and now speaks French, English and German.
I think I might be doing something right here though I admit that I miss the money.
Do I love my children? You tell me.
Do I like my sons? No, not always. Sometimes they can be obnoxious monsters and I cant wait for them to become adults ( Actually Louis wont ever be leaving home unless to go into a home and that wont happen for as long as I can help it )
Please be honest about your own feelings : Yes your kids will absolutely will say and do things you dont like. They will rip your heart out and play football with it...then give it back with a request for sweets.
Its why they need parents. Empathy does not come easy and some never get it.
If you deny the hurt or the occasional dislike of what they are at the moment then you can come to resent them. That resentment absolutely will creep up on you and bite you where it hurts.
If your kids hurt you then let them know. You are not and can never be invincible.
Yes you can call me 'hard' and 'unfeeling' but I dont get called 'gentille maman' for nothing. ( gentle mum )
Im working on it : Been ages since I burned the salad.