I was molested by an elder at age 5 and he was never punished. He also molested his daughters and died an elder. So in my little head, I figured Jehovah had no use for me if he wasn't accountable. I went on to pioneer and got in an abusive/neglectful marriage. I took what I thought was the high road (proving loyal to Jehovah in spite of it all) knowing full well I wasn't worthy of the New System. sick.
Posts by alamb
-
45For those who were raised in "the truth"
by Hangin_on inhow many of you always felt like you would be killed at armageddon no matter what you did... it was never enough and your parents put a guilt trip on you?
-
-
-
5
Ex-RLDS 'lost boys' sue over shunning/expulsion...hmmm
by alamb inhttp://news.aol.com/topnews/articles/_a/lost-boy-sues-utah-polygamist-leader/20070221161309990001?cid=2359
-
-
alamb
It always gets back to First Amendment Rights of an organization v. Parental Rights. Sooner or later, the pendulum will have to swing. I've always thought it could be approached as the First Amendment Rights of the CHILD are being violated by forcing him to choose a religion or lose a parent.
-
37
COMF: Who's still here?
by COMF inhi, ya'll.
i left jw's voluntarlily in 1987, still believing but thinking something was wrong with me that caused jehovah to reject me in spite of my best effforts.
after that it was "let us eat and drink, for tomorrow we die".
-
-
alamb
I remember you on H20 when I was lurking. Nice to hear from you again!
-
34
Independent Thinking
by Jeffro ini decided to do a search of the watchtower library cd on the phrase 'independent thinking'.
only three times is it ever spoken of as being a good thing.
and those three instances are quite telling about the insidiousness of all of the other times that jw publications consider independent thinking to be such a bad thing.. .
-
-
alamb
I posted this awhile back...
The Recovering Thinker
Hi, my name is Bob, and I am a recovering thinker….
It started out innocently enough: I began thinking at meetings now and then to loosen up. Inevitably though, one thought led to another and soon I was more than just a theocratic thinker. I began to think alone, you know, “to relax,” I told myself, but I knew it wasn’t true.
Thinking became more and more important, and finally I was thinking all the time. I even thought at the Kingdom Hall. I knew thinking and my position in the congregatin didn’t mix, but I couldn’t stop. I began avoiding the friends at lunchtime so I could read Crisis of Conscience and other works that challenged my thought processes. I returned to the Kingdom Hall dizzied and confused, asking, “What exactly are we doing here?”
Things weren’t great at home either. One evening I turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life guided by the FDS—she spent the night at her mother’s.
I soon had a reputation as a heavy thinker. One day the PO called me into the back room and said, “Bob, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking is a real problem. If you don’t stop thinking, I’ll have to recommend you be disfellowshipped.” This gave me a lot to think about.
I went home early after my conversation with the elder. “Honey,” I confessed, “I’ve been thinking.”
“I know you’ve been thinking,” she said, “and I want a divorce.”
“But Honey, surely it’s not that serious.”
“It is serious,” she said, lower lip quivering. “You have been a fine window washer all your life and your service to Jehovah comes before the children and I having health insurance or educations.”
“That’s faulty syllogism,” I said impatiently, and she began to cry. I’d had enough. “I’m going to the library to look up what really happened in 607/587,” I snarled and stomped out the door. I headed to the library in the mood for enlightenment, roared into the parking lot, and ran up to the big glass doors—they didn’t open. The library was closed.
To this day I believe Jehovah was looking out for me that night. As I sank to the ground clawing at the unfeeling glass, whimpering for a computer with an internet connection to feed my starving mind, a magazine caught my eye; a Watchtower left in a laundromat. The words “Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?” stood out in large letters. You may recognize the line: it comes from the standard issue “Thinkers Anonymous” poster.
Today, I am a recovering thinker. I never miss a meeting . At each meeting we listen to a non-educational, self congratulatory public talk. I am again training my mind to be numb. Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting. I still have my family and things are a lot better at home. Life just got easier, somehow, once I stopped thinking.
Soon, I’ll be able to be an elder again….
Thanks, Bob
-
5
Ex-RLDS 'lost boys' sue over shunning/expulsion...hmmm
by alamb inhttp://news.aol.com/topnews/articles/_a/lost-boy-sues-utah-polygamist-leader/20070221161309990001?cid=2359
-
-
-
33
If you could be anywhere right now.....
by PaulJ inif you could be anywhere right now, doing anything.... what would it be?.
right now, i'd be watching oasis in concert, bottle of beer in one hand, a tiny tiny bit drunk.....
-
-
alamb
Sitting next to my grandfather in his old Chev pickup bumping down a dirt road that smelled like rain.
-
8
Lying elder on the stand exposed in new version of testimony video!
by Wasanelder Once inhey people,.
this really knocks the socks off this liar.
it includes pages from the custody packet that he denys knowledge of and a km from 1992 with the announcement of its availability.
-
-
alamb
This was a child custody dispute. My ex called in the "Brother" to testify that shunning doesn't exist. I had argued that if the children's father got custody, my own and my children's freedom of religious rights would be trampled as I would be shunned by my children. The children's rights to have two loving parents would also be called into question. That opened up a can of worms: Religious freedom v. Parental and children's rights.
I came into court with 4 ex-JW's who testified before he did as to the effects of shunning on their families. Jim Johnson, the elder, wasn't allowed in the court so as not to corroborate his testimony. So his lies showed blatantly to the court what they will do....lie to cover up their teachings....including the booklet that instructs them to lie.
I have been compiling the documents and info. for the U. S. Justice Department after speaking to them regarding the teachings of a group to perjure themselves. If anyone can help please p.m. me. I need affidavits as to the effects of perjury re: abuse, custody, etc.
-
6
Local puff piece on blood needs responses
by Dogpatch inthis was in our local paper today.
methinks the dubs are busy trying to counter all their negative publicity lately!.
randy.
-
-
alamb
My grandmother was a victim of the old blood policy. My letter's in the works.
-
108
How Far Up The "Ranks" Did You Go In The Organization?
by minimus inat age 18, i was a regular pioneer.
at 20, a ministerial servant.
at 24 an elder.
-
-
alamb
Baptized at 16.
Auxiliary Pioneer 4 years.
Regular Pioneer 6 years.
Married an elder.
Got to "man" the literature counter due to lack of brothers and also read at the book study.
Circuit assembly part for turning down a college scholarship. Other assembly parts.
Worked unassigned territory.
Considered for international Bethel work...but got pregnant.
Victim of "good old boys" club. (oh, and molested by two elders...almost forgot)
-
4
serious child custody question
by reneef inhas anyone divorced a jw and had a good outcome with co-parenting?
has anyone been able to stop the spouse from taking the kids to meetings?
do you think a person can ensure their kids get a quality life if they are out of the home and the ex has primary custody?
-
-
alamb
I have a court order blocking my ex from exposing my children from anyone who shuns me (including my family), from going to any meetings, etc. Of course he doesn't obey Satan's court.