appollyn

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Posts by appollyn

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  7

  Is this for real?

  by flower in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  is the society really ok with this or is there like a rebel band of witnesses who set these up and run it against the societys wishes?

  i wonder what the word in the kh is about sites like this.

  i know when i was a jw i would never have believed i'd see something like this...not legitimately run by jw's anyway.

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  appollyn

  I would say that it is not a legit site.... would a real JW even have any mention of drinking or smoking prefs?

  I am an evil person .... like to me them and show them the light!
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  18

  Newbie! My saga

  by appollyn in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i wanted to first take the chance to thank everyone for all of their posts on this forum.

  it is nice to know that i am not alone out here.

  i was a lifer born and raised, drifted out completely about 6 years ago and have struggled with an identity crisis since.

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  appollyn

  Thanks for the warm welcome! Better than I got at the KH!

  Michelle - I am in the Springfield area.... vast majority of my history is here too.

  Thanks again to all!
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  18

  Newbie! My saga

  by appollyn in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i wanted to first take the chance to thank everyone for all of their posts on this forum.

  it is nice to know that i am not alone out here.

  i was a lifer born and raised, drifted out completely about 6 years ago and have struggled with an identity crisis since.

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  appollyn

  Hi to all! I wanted to first take the chance to thank everyone for all of their posts on this forum. It is nice to know that I am not alone out here. I was a lifer born and raised, drifted out completely about 6 years ago and have struggled with an identity crisis since. I have enough stuff for two dozen posts?. But I wanted to lay out my history first, let you all get to know me?. if ya want too.

  I would appreciate and welcome any and all comments. Its nice to have somebody out there that has an understanding of you?re background. I imagine that I will make much more sense to all of you than anyone else.

  I was born in Ohio a small town that should have been forgotten a long time ago. My mother a hardcore lifer JW from age 7, and my dad a reformed teenage delinquent around 16, married when they were 21 and 19 respectively, in the late 50s. They were the young pioneer spirit. They had the goal of serving in Bethel, but received the surprise of my sister as they were approved to go to the Big Apple. At any rate they persevered, soon to be joined by my oldest brother. They worked hard in the congregation and were well liked. In the late 60s, there was a call to serve where the need was great. My parents uprooted the family, job and friends and moved to my birthplace. The fledgling congregation flourished. My other brother was born in the and about a year and a half later so was I. Dad was an elder, mom stayed at home and took care of the kids and took us all out in service. We had family Bible studies and all. We lived very close to the hall and quite frequently after book studies or TMS and SM we would have a couple dozen people over to the house for refreshments. I remember it all distinctly.

  But around that time my oldest brother was a teenager. He has always been the ?black sheep? so to speak in the family. He got involved with smoking and other things as some teens do, but since he was baptized, they DF?d him. At that time there wasn?t a lot of guidelines regarding how the family was to be considered ?.. so they removed my dad as an elder?. and all the after meeting get togethers? Gone ?.. ghost town. Family life decayed?. Family bible studies became more of a hassle. Over the years I have learned that my father was very offended that he was treated as such, because he helped most or all of the elders that removed him become elders themselves. Mom was the strong one through adversity. She pushed on and kept everyone going to the meetings. My brother when he turned 18 moved out of the house and not long after my sister left as well.

  Around the time I was in 5 th grade my parents uprooted the family again to move to a town 30 miles south. It was a bigger town ?better schools? they said. It was culture shock for me?. at school and at the KH. I was raised to that point in a farm town ? now I was in the city schools. It was tough for me as a kid being ?separate from the world?, I didn?t want to be different from everybody else. I remember once in 2 nd grade, saying for a St. Patrick?s day party even though I knew my mom would be mad. I ate the green jello and wiped my mouth with the green napkin, just like all the other kids. I knew I wasn?t supposed to do it ?. But I did anyway. I went home and told my mom and she told me I needed to go pray to J for him to forgive me. I remember it all like it was yesterday ?. Even though it happened over 25 years ago. Guilty green jello. Never have been able to look at it and not think of that since. Anyway, I never was able to really fit into the new congregation. I had a couple friends that I hung out with but never really mainstreamed. I got baptized when I was 15, because I thought that was what I was supposed to do?.. maybe I could fit in then.

  I wanted so badly to fit in somewhere. I never went to school dances or parties that kids had form school. I felt so totally alienated. My parents thought it was best if I graduated early from high school. If you look at my birthday, I eeked into the school year barely having turned 5. I graduated from high school when I was 16?..turned 17 that fall. Much to my dismay and further alienation, I enrolled at a local community college. I?m sure there have been discussions about the follies of high education. I graduated when I was 18 with my Associates degree. Of course, through all of this I was never doing enough in the congregation, at least in the eyes of the elders. I was out of high school and wasting my time in the pursuit of material things. Not trying to learn a way to make a decent living, so I didn?t have to live at home with my parents until I was 30, or trying to live off of stocking grocery shelves while I was doing what I was supposed to be doing ?. Pioneering. I did auxiliary pioneer for 3 months ? we drove around the countryside throwing firecrackers and bottle rockets out of the windows of my car. I also have several complete sets of Fun Meal toys. That was productive.

  I continued to work full time and slipped in my service activity, doing just the minimum so I didn?t get tagged as an irregular publisher. And like a lot of young sexually repressed ?dewdrops? went looking for a spiritual partner. I never really looked for anyone that was going to pioneer, I wanted somebody to make out with. Guess what ? her friend told the elders. Judicial Committee 1! That was fun. I spent 4 hours answering questions and getting hammered for details, never really getting much realignment. I will have to elaborate on that story another time. Any rate?. After those 4 hours?. Public reproof. All of my privileges revoked! I got a number of them back. I met a girl that was 5 years younger than me, I really liked her (she is the one that will haunt me for the remainder of my life), judicial committee 2. That about the same time I had gotten engaged. Short story ?. Private reproof. But, I couldn?t get married in the KH. Oh well, had a really cool outdoor wedding at the Community College that I went too. Really nice.

  My slide picked up from there and eventually I gave up going all together. I usually had to work late or something came up. We bought a house and remodeled it and that was pretty much the end of going to the KH. My mom really had a problem with it and I think initially she might have told some we were trying another congregation.

  Fast forward to the future. I have 3 kids, 7 y/o boy, 6 y/o boy, and a 4 y/o girl. A dead end job, a strained marriage, a mortgage, two car payments and enough credit debt to last the rest of my natural life.

  I?ve got more ?. But here?s my start! Looking forward to chatting with you all.

  P.S. If you are curious ?appollyn? is a name from the Revelation book?.. it means ?the destroyer?, think it was JC?s name in the battle of Armageddon ? seems fitting to me for some reason.
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  52

  What did you day dream about at assemblies?

  by lastcall in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  as a kid i would try to pay attention, but i just couldn't hang in there.

  if i didn't day dream i was going to go insane.. i used to create scenarios in my mind that i was a jw super hero.

  i had a special costume that was partially made of "flubber" that would allow me to bounce all over the auditorium.

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  appollyn

  Chocolate pudding and Fruit bags! HAHAHAHAHA

  I used to fly around the coliseums ... occasionally swam in the baptisimal pool .. and I killed a few of the popular young MS. They irritated the crap out of me ... struting around. RRRR

  Then after I got batized I could volunteer... tried to stay away from the cleaning dept. too much work. I work the contribution boxes, JW secret service! What could be a better fantasy!