Posts by kat2u

33

It's happening, the anger and depression are taking over

by Tim Horton in

jw
friends

i haven't posted for a while.

i'm starting to really lose my cool.

i'm angry all the time, it seems at everyone.

kat2u

Yes... I have been there and felt the same way... therapy helped and friends but it took awhile, And i did get very depressed in the process... try to think of it in a different way... a challenge to make it on your own,,, a new opportunity.....A begining of a different and possibly much better life... try though i know its easier said than done you will be up and down for awhile

12

....a group hug and 'hi' for tim horton?

by reboot in

jw
friends

.

..wonder if anyone would like to help me send a hug and a 'hi' to tim; she's lovely and could do with a smile on her face at the moment...jw's can be pretty nasty when they're feeling righteous.....

kat2u

Chin up and remember... You are above it all...

190

All Secret Santa Paricipants sign in here please!

by Gadget in

jw
friends

the details of who to send a gift to will be getting pm'd to you all either friday afternoon or saturday morning!

according to the information i've found online the last posting day for standard parcels is dec 11th for usa and december 15th for the uk/europe, so you should all have plenty of time to select and send a gift, although sending sooner rather than later is prefered.

can everyone taking part post on this thread what things they like, what their interests are etc so that the person who is buying a gift for you has some idea what to get you.

kat2u

I collect english setter things, LOOOve glass or crystal xmas ornaments, shelia's houses are another passion.

61

I'm worried about our 8-year-old -- anybody got any ideas?

by cruzanheart in

jw
friends

our 8-year-old son, jackson, is exhibiting the following symptoms:.

* disorganized (unfortunately, this has kind of been since birth but more pronounced now).

* hard to concentrate.

kat2u

I remember a few years ago when my son was in 2nd grade i think it was I asked the teacher if he notices how distracted my son was ,hard to get him tio finish anything he always got side tracted.

His teacher laughed and said I have a Class full of them , your son is actually not as bad as most. I was shocked as I couldnt imagine any worse.Maybe its part of the age. he is somewhat better now.

Also I am sure that the meds he he is on dont help at all.He sounds not that abnormal to me.

P.S. my son gets very emotional sometimes too

117

I'm gettin me a couple more wives!

by gumby in

i figure since jehovah had no problem with the faithful men of old having more than one wife, he wouldn't mind if i got me a couple more and won't kick my arse at armageddon.

polygamy was practised without criticism in the old testament.

in fact, it was regulated by law.

kat2u

I actually researched this subject at one time for a return visit.

I good ol bound volumes as I recall explained it as having to do with the need to increase the numbers of his followers durring that time in history. And hey what better way use a male who has a almost unexhaustable ability to reproduce with as many women( who get tired of being pregnant and giving birth over and over again) as possible.

Seems maybe it was hard to find a good god following man back then so needed to take full advantage to make more.

21

My daughter and granddaughter.

by kat2u in

this may be a bit long,,, sorry,.

my daughter t was born when i was a married witness,i was almost 21.she was a very sweet outgoing loving child.when she was 4 i had another daughter s .

lol this one was my challenge when she was little but is now such a joy to me.. anyway t began school at 5 and seemed to be doing well with school and her friends.. just about a month after she began 1st grade we had stopped to eat lunch while out in service.t suddenly made a strange noise she looked off into space with a strange stare and wouldnt respond to anything we said or did.i was in a panic by the time she began talking again and told us that she heard us but couldnt answer us at that point.demons?was my first thought but as i began to ask her about it then i began to feel she had had a small seizure.

kat2u

to continue again....

T had a baby girl who was perfectly normal last january so my grandaughter Emily is almost a year old,She is so beautiful from what I have seen of her.I did get to see her at the hospital the day she was born. But have not been allowed to see her except in passing since then.We live in the same town so I run have run into them a couple times.

T has informed me that my ability to have any relationship with herself or Emily depends on my standing in the eyes of jehovah. Meaning the elders I repeated to her when she told me this.

I will not ever be a witness again!!! I will not love my children with CONDITIONS. I told T when I talked to her last that I love her and Emily no matter what and though I wont be a witness again that I will always be here for them if they need me.

By the way her new husband seems a nice man from what I can tell.And whenever I see him he has shown me more love and respect thanT. He even calls me mom. But of course he doesnt go out of his way to see me either as any good dub.

So my heart aches for my eldest daughter and grandaughter. And to keep her on the straight my MOTHER super witness, makes sure to stay in close contact with my daughter to keep her in line.Though this mother of mine was NOT there when things were bad! either when my daughter was sick nor her son!!!!!

Sorry to go on so long it feels good to get some of this stuff out.

21

My daughter and granddaughter.

by kat2u in

this may be a bit long,,, sorry,.

my daughter t was born when i was a married witness,i was almost 21.she was a very sweet outgoing loving child.when she was 4 i had another daughter s .

lol this one was my challenge when she was little but is now such a joy to me.. anyway t began school at 5 and seemed to be doing well with school and her friends.. just about a month after she began 1st grade we had stopped to eat lunch while out in service.t suddenly made a strange noise she looked off into space with a strange stare and wouldnt respond to anything we said or did.i was in a panic by the time she began talking again and told us that she heard us but couldnt answer us at that point.demons?was my first thought but as i began to ask her about it then i began to feel she had had a small seizure.

kat2u

to continue....

We then began the series of further tests and visits to surgens.Also being good dubs we were in nose deep with the blood issue.We were told at one point that she probably has six months to live.

Well after another couple weeks of hell we left for california for her brain surgery,

Which actually went better than we expected because her speech wasnt affected as they thought it might be.So then back home and off to onocoligist.

To back track a little I was getting some support from those at the hall but my husband was very uninvolved for the most part in this process.But thats a whole nother story.

T went thru radiation therapy for a bout 6 weeks i think it was. And durring this time her personality changed alot.I remember going to the radiation therapist and crying because I didnt understand why she was changing in her personality so much.

After the radiaiton was done she was back to school and though no sezures she was unable to pick up anything new in school.She ended up in special classes because she couldnt follow in the regular class,And she was having some social problems as well.

She became very hard to reason with and so hard headed about very stupid things that it was difficult to deal with her sometimes. as she went thru my divorce and my disfellowshipping it definatly made it even worse especially sinse this was durring her teen years. and her abilities eventually got to about 4th grade level and stopped there.

She kept going to meetings as I had told the girls it was there choice.

But she moved out in a huff at 18 and I was very frightened for her.She got involved with a stange non witness family and moved around quite a few times in the next year or two but was very determined to do things her way.So I had no choice I let her and tried to be there for her when she got into tough stuff.

Eventually after living with a guy for about 6 months she got pregnant.I was upset but told her I would be there for her And that I would help in whatever way I could.

she avoided those from the hall so wasnt disfellowshipped, at her first ultrasound they found the baby had a heart defect.we all cried and did alot of reading on this defect and found that the baby was viable.We had specialist and surgeon all ready and lined up she and I became very close and I was there when her son Tyler was born.she said to me MOM I have a Baby He was perfect in every way except for his heart that is.

When he was three days old the were going to do surgery on his heart to manage his defect I was the only one there with T even babies dad didnt show up till later.

Tyler passed away on the table because the bypass machine malfunctioned while he was on it.We were devastated! She said to me MOM my baby is DEAD, I felt so helpless as we followed them into the room to see him after he was gone And i picked him up and handed him to his mother because i felt she had to hold him to feel him being gone.It was the hardest thing I ever have done.

She and I went to grief counseling together as Tylers dad was no longer in the picture very quickly after tylers death.

Soon after that T began going to meetings again within about a year and a half she was engaged to a brother and no longer speaking much to me, She got married and The wedding was very tough for me as I was not to be at the reception and was shunned at the wedding.

So then within the next year she was again pregnant.... again im taking a break,,,

21

My daughter and granddaughter.

by kat2u in

this may be a bit long,,, sorry,.

my daughter t was born when i was a married witness,i was almost 21.she was a very sweet outgoing loving child.when she was 4 i had another daughter s .

lol this one was my challenge when she was little but is now such a joy to me.. anyway t began school at 5 and seemed to be doing well with school and her friends.. just about a month after she began 1st grade we had stopped to eat lunch while out in service.t suddenly made a strange noise she looked off into space with a strange stare and wouldnt respond to anything we said or did.i was in a panic by the time she began talking again and told us that she heard us but couldnt answer us at that point.demons?was my first thought but as i began to ask her about it then i began to feel she had had a small seizure.

kat2u

This may be a bit long,,, sorry,

My daughter T was born when I was a married witness,I was almost 21.She was a very sweet outgoing loving child.When she was 4 I had another daughter S . LOL this one was my challenge when she was little but is now such a joy to me.

Anyway T began school at 5 and seemed to be doing well with school and her friends.

Just about a month after she began 1st grade we had stopped to eat lunch while out in service.T suddenly made a strange noise she looked off into space with a strange stare and wouldnt respond to anything we said or did.I was in a panic by the time she began talking again and told us that she heard us but couldnt answer us at that point.DEMONS?Was my first thought but as I began to ask her about it then i began to feel she had had a small seizure. I called the doctor as soon as I got home and he told me not to worry and to bring her in on monday,

I wasnt happy about this but did as he said.I told her to let me know if it happened again.It did once more before monday.I told the dr, what was going on and he told me that I was wrapped around her little finger but that if i was insistent he would schedual a eeg for the next week.NEXT WEEK?! I called around and got her an appointment at a clinic the next day for an eeg.

As this very sweet woman was doing the EEG i asked her if she could tell me what it meant.She said No you need a neuroligist (please excuse any spelling) for that.I said I dont have one, How do I get one? she said i could make an appt but it would take a couple weeks to get into see one I Got very upset....she pulled some strings and we left right then and went to a local neuroligists office. He did the EEG and she had a seizure while they were doing it.I thought ohh good now they can tell me.

He was a bit nervous about me not going thru my regular dr. I could tell ,and he told me it was like nothing he had ever seen before and so I just should ignore them.I couldnt do that so I began testing her durring her seizures and found she could remember what i was saying to her after the seizure but could not speak or move her left side durring the seizures. she was having one or two a day at this point.

I then went to the library and checked out books on seizures and the causes. Found out she was having complex partial seizures and often caused by brain tumors.I told dr. this but to no avail.About 2 weeks into this she bagan to fall backwards durring seizures andher eye would jump when having them. FINALLY dr said. hmmm no way she could fake that she needs to be in hospital till we figure this out.

So into hospital she went Dr. still convinced she was somehow faking and he tried to make her bring them on herself... she didnt. he decided to send her home on seizure meds.I said I wanted CT scan before she went home. Dr finally agreed to it.He said they would do a simple one and since the contrast they sometimes put in thru IV had some risks that they wouldnt use it unless they saw something.I was waiting there alone when the nurse came out and asked her weight so they could use the IV contrastI KNEW..... and tried to ask her but she wouldnt say anything. I paced the floors till the Dr. came and told me they had found a brain tumor. My mother in law who was there with me by then began hyper ventilating and so we had to try to calm her down all I could think of was what does this mean????? tell me more!!!!

wow im worn out will continue more later

13

Funeral today

by kat2u in

well i have decided to attend a funeral this afternoon at the kingdom hall.an elder whom i feel was a very nice man passed away .. his wife has always been welcomming to me at the hall.

and doesnt do the ,i dont see you thing, if and when we run into each other in public.

she actually smiles and nods to me.. it will be interesting as my daughter and son in law and grandaughter (whom i dont see unless by accident) will be attending too.. it has been a hard choice as weather to go or not.

kat2u

I did it. I went to the funeral I got a peek thru the crowd at my grand daughter that made me a bit teary,I would love to hold her and tell her who I am.

I saw people I knew well years ago didnt speak to anyone except some lady next to me who asked me how i knew the departed but when I told her I was disfellowshipped then of course I became invisable.OHHHH except when they were looking up the scriptures she made sure that if I had wanted to I could read from her bible. had I wanted to look up scriptures though I would have brought my own.

The only really annoying thing was when a brother( elder who years ago wouldnt leave my children alone, and tried to get them to tell the elders all that was going on in my home)

He followed me out to my car to tell me he was happy to see me there. I really detest this man, so I said thankyou sweetly but then shut my car door so as to effectivly end any further conversation.

I cried a bit on the way home for lost friends and family, But I am glad I went. thankyou all for your encouragment

13

Funeral today

by kat2u in

well i have decided to attend a funeral this afternoon at the kingdom hall.an elder whom i feel was a very nice man passed away .. his wife has always been welcomming to me at the hall.

and doesnt do the ,i dont see you thing, if and when we run into each other in public.

she actually smiles and nods to me.. it will be interesting as my daughter and son in law and grandaughter (whom i dont see unless by accident) will be attending too.. it has been a hard choice as weather to go or not.

kat2u

thankyou for the responses, I will go , and yes I am second guessing myself. A fault I am trying to overcome.I think I will make her a card to give to her and let her know how I appreciated her husband.