Posts by Incognito

23

Does Disfellowshipping only prohibit spiritual contact with a DF family member or friend?

by Isambard Crater in

all through my life, now in my 40's, i've seen df people get completely shunned by family and friends, but an ex elder showed me the stfog book that says it's just spiritual contact that stops.

so what's the crack?

i'm mega confused, as i want to go p.o.m.o or ideally da but don't want to loose family..

Incognito

StephaneL stated it correctly.

JWs are not to even offer a greeting to a DF'd or DA'd person, but when that person is a family member who resides within the same home, then WT stipulates there be minimal interaction and certainly no discussion of 'spiritual' matters.

If the df'd family member does not live in the same home, there is to be no interaction except for when family business is necessary.

When a family member lives in the home, I've heard where some JW families have required the df'd person to eat in another room or at a different time as that person was not permitted to eat with other JW family members. I also understand some parents of a df'd child, have required that child to move-out once reaching 18 years of age (or other age of adulthood applicable to that country).

Often, a person does not need to be df'd to be treated as such as many JWs will provide that treatment to anyone who no longer attends meetings.

38

What Privileges do you get when you are baptized ?

by LOLS in

my husband was baptized at the recent 2018 convention in south africa ....... he was very annoyed that his non-believing wife did not attend the baptism....... but i think he received pressure from his jw father & elders as to why his wife was not attending ....... anyway ..... it's really water off my back .

i wanted to know what privileges you get as a baptized jw man , as i saw a message from one of the elders at his cong , congratulating him on his baptism and to earning more privileges ..... what are these privileges the elder is speaking about ,,,,, .

i don't feel like asking my husband as it just lands up in a stupid fight ..... or a long winded explanation ..... thanks .

Incognito

LOLS, sorry for your loss.

It sounds as if he did not discuss his plans or request your views before proceeding. A spouse deciding to become a practicing JW, typically will not take into consideration the impact that decision will have on other members of the family even when the remaining family has no intention of becoming JWs themselves.

Things you may normally take for granted such as Christmas and Birthday observances will often become heated issues. If you or one of your children should be injured and require a blood transfusion, will he honor or consider your wishes or will he oppose a transfusion regardless?

You said:

which we all know they are not allowed to get divorced ...

This is not fully correct. Some JWs couples do become divorced.

Even when there is a legal divorce, if there is no infidelity by either party, then the JW is not free to be in a relationship with anyone else as he/she continues to be considered as married 'scripturally'. JWs consider the only valid reason to dissolve a marriage in God's eyes, is unfaithfulness.

If a divorced JW wishes to remain in favor with the organization but wants to pursue a relationship with someone else, they may attempt to gather evidence to a sexual relationship by their ex-spouse or request an admission to that in writing from their ex. Without a 'scriptural' divorce, the JW maybe disfellowshipped if they remarry.

22

Expected pain

by former2free in

last week was a big week for me in terms of coming totally clean to my wife and her being more than on board to leave the jw’s with me.

we know what to expect but things happen from family and it still hurts just as bad.

last night my wife got a long text message from her brother that has seemed to be in the fence and he told her that same guilt tripping rhetoric that the wt uses about life in the paradise etc.

Incognito

Just because you and your wife decided to leave the religion, does not mean your other JW family need to be made aware right away.

Both of you are starting a new experience in which to become accustomed. In a new situation, you may each be vulnerable to family emotions including pressure and suggestion that you are not doing the right thing and need to start attending meetings or even study again with a strong JW.

Take your time and be cautious with what you say to others, at least until you are settled and at ease with your situation and the decisions you each have made.

40

Branch Co-ordinators letter re the Australian Royal Commission

by stuckinarut2 in

this letter was posted on the aust and nz facebook group this week.. it is self explanatory!

wow.... it seems to be their attempt at controlling the situation after the arc fallout.. .

Incognito

Is this geniune or did someone on Facebook create it as a hoax?

Even if written from one WT committee to another:

No WT letterhead
Authored by a named person, not the usual generic no name provided closing
Too easily accepts WT 'confidential' documents will all eventually make their way to the internet

Suspicious, and too easily created by almost anyone.

Depending on the device you are viewing this on, if the attachment is blurry, try refreshing the page.

45

Broadcasting august, clown Lett about painting the K-hall

by Gorbatchov in

jw
friends

did you see the performance of stephen lett on august broadcasting?.

the illustration of painting the kingdom hall?.

used for explaining that you have to listen to elders even when they are totaly wrong?.

Incognito

I guess this goes along with their prior 'demand' to follow their directions even when those directions don't make sense from a human perspective.

I expect those that do comply without question, demonstrate their indoctrination whereas those that don't fully comply, will be viewed critically and as fence sitters, calling themselves JWs for their own selfish reasons such as, to maintain their relationship with their JW family.

12

No meetings memorial week

by Saltheart Foamfollower in

the august monthly announcements letter, among other things, says that if a memorial is midweek, there is to be no midweek meeting and if at a weekend, then no weekend meeting.

previously it was only no other meeting on the same day.

is this because so many congregations now share halls that scheduling it has become almost impossible?.

Incognito

I seem to recall, years ago, midweek meetings being commonly cancelled during week of memorial. Perhaps it depended on which weeknight the memorial occurred on. Our congregation shared a KH with another Cong but I don't ever recall bookstudy or ministry school being rescheduled to a normally non-meeting night (Mon, Wed, Fri or Sat).

For sure, there was no school or service meeting when there was a circuit assembly that coming weekend. Then again, CAs had then started on Friday evening and were held over the entire weekend including Saturday evening.

30

DFed talking to other DFed

by blownaway in

i don't know if they do this any longer but back in the day they had a special section at an assembly sectioned off for dfed people who would have to wear a ribbon that said disfellowshipped.

do they still do this and what was the rules on dfed talking to dfed at the assembly?

Incognito

I started attending in the early 1960s and never recall any such identification or designated areas.

A large number of DF'd and DA'd persons clearly identified as such and sitting in one area, would likely make an unwanted statement to the other attendees.

With regards to DF'd persons speaking with one another, I believe WT continues to prohibit such activity. Of course, unless the person wishes to be reinstated, why would a DF'd person care what WT prohibits.

I have heard where a DF'd person was pulled aside by an elder and 'counselled' against speaking with another DF'd person. The DF'd person's response was WT's rules are for JWs in good standing so he can speak with anyone he wishes.

89

why the watchtower is so short of money

by pepperheart in

the watchtower is so short of money because they have to pay for all the upkeep of so many branch offices around the world.because so many of the branch offices are in very poor countries and they are not balancing the budgets.

Incognito

Isn't it odd there is plenty of verifyable information made public for Sears and other private corporation finaces, but so little to be found regarding WT? Instead, GB 2.0 claim WT expenses exceed donations, even as it is subsidized by the public through tax exempt status, but they do not provide independant audited financial statements to support and verify those claims.

Just as active JWs can never do enough in preaching (do more, do more, do more ...), JWs can also never donate enough to satisfy WT's insatiable appetite for money.

13

Could you really trust the Governing Body to the right thing?

by no-zombie in

over the years, many have speculated on how the governing body might reform the society into something that might actually bring some positivity in to the world ... and a resent melancholy moment, i re-watched the youtube clip of usa for africa's, 'we are the world' which was released in 1985. now while i know our men in warwick would never actually consider organizing the brotherhood to do something completely selfless in helping the truly worldly poor, something that would actually improve the religion's reputation ... but the question is ... could you really trust the governing body to run an aid program like usa for africa or band aid, without skimming from the top?.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m9bnonfkcbi.

Incognito

truly believe that every "charitable scheme" that I have seen done by WT Corp has been for the purpose of making a "profit" on it - DOC

Does WT actually provide charity?

While there are reports of JWs assisting in disaster areas, my understanding is that individual JWs travel and provide that assistance on their own time and at at their own expense. I do not recall hearing WT supplying staff persons (Bethelites) time, travel and accommodations.

Even if WT supply building materials and other supplies to rebuild homes, are those materials only to be used for JWs who are in good standing, or for anyone in-need? If WT requires reimbursement for materials and labor from each homeowner through payment from an insurance claim, can that really be considered charity even if it is referred to as "a donation"?

While JWs around the world are expected to supply donations to build KHs and to support the WW preaching work especially in less affluent regions, are any KHs actually supplied as charity or are JWs using those halls expected to reimburse WT forever as is required in more affluent locations?

Since JWs preach using their own time, fuel, equipment and expense, other than WT literature, what preaching work is actually made possible through WWW donations, especially if missionaries are no longer paid?

15

My father has cancer??

by blisterfeet in

i am semi estranged from my jw family.

i am interested in a relationship but it never works.. they aren’t interested at all so we just leave it like that.. i received a text from my half-sister yesterday saying “your dad has cancer, it’s bad, i don’t know anything” i figured there was more to the story and if my dad needed me to know anything he would tell me.

or not.. i spoke with my mom this morning.

Incognito

I too offer my sympathies.

Remember, relationships work in two directions. While you may choose to offer your love, concern and support as his son/daughter, if your efforts are rejected, at least you can feel happy for having made the effort. You can't force others to accept your efforts, even if they are family.

If a good relationship with your father has not existed for some time, this is probably the reason you maybe feeling some indifference to the situation as he is likely somewhat of a stranger to you.