Fleur

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Posts by Fleur

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  28

  REPOST: For mothers who have lost a child

  by Lady Lee in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  on mother's day we often forget those who are mother's but never had the chance to hold their child.

  some because they chose to give their child up for adoption.

  others because of miscarriage or stillbirth.

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  Fleur

  WW: You most definitely do matter. Any woman who knows the feeling of carrying another life within her, for a day, or to term, is a mother. Any woman who loves a child with all her heart and soul and adopts it to raise as her own is a mother.

  SF, I didn't know about your son, I am so sorry. Bizzy, I am so sorry about your son as well. I can't even begin to know what to say.

  I'm thinking of fathers who've lost children too...they grieve as well. :(

  This holiday turns out to be quite a landmine doesn't it? For those of us who are still sad over our own relationships/lack there of with our mothers, and for those who have, and have lost, the most precious gift anyone can ever receive.

  The anniversary of my first miscarriage is coming up. It was also very near the due date for the second baby. I should've been able to bury the second one, things were not handled properly. It still bothers me, very much.

  Maybe I should go visit my Grandmother's grave this weekend, finally...she was more my mother than any woman ever will be, even the woman who carried and birthed me, her own daughter.

  hugs to all

  essie
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  27

  What Used To Bother Your Conscience?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  many jws were trained to have "sensitive" consciences.

  very little ever bothered my conscience.

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  Fleur

  Ian!!! so good to see you, mate! *hugs*

  to answer the question, Minimus, it'd be easier to ask, what didn't bother me??? Because even if something didn't make me feel guilty, (and everything did) someone else's conscience (usually my older, nosybody sister's *rolling eyes* and her super-pious elder husband's would be bothered and they'd send the elders 'round to counsel me!)

  god am I glad that's over now LOL

  essie
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  28

  REPOST: For mothers who have lost a child

  by Lady Lee in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  on mother's day we often forget those who are mother's but never had the chance to hold their child.

  some because they chose to give their child up for adoption.

  others because of miscarriage or stillbirth.

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  Fleur

  God, Skally, that picture is beautiful. I am bawling here.

  I have one living child and lost two to miscarriage. You don't ever get over losing a child, you learn to live with it. LL, this is a great thread. I urge everyone who knows someone who lost a child to honor them this mother's day in some way and mention the child. I guarantee it, any mother who loses a child in any way IS thinking of them on Mother's day, no matter how many living children' they have. My great grandmother had more than a dozen kids...she lost one as a toddler and another to still birth...and she always grieved them both.

  essie
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  7

  Need to vent

  by caligirl in

  1. social
  2. family

  i am so pissed at the family court system.

  did you know that there is a state which shall remain nameless at this point that by law requires child support to continue to the age of 21, or as long as the "child' is attending school (and they have to attend only part time, which at community college is usually 2 classes or about 6 credits) it is bad enough that the majority of teenagers today have an "entitlement mentality", but now there is a law that backs them up!!!

  kids don't even have to say thank you because they are "entitled" by the nature of the socialist crappy laws to do it!!

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  Fleur

  If he is not talking to us anyways, why should he have the right to a huge chunk of his father's paycheck for the next 3 years?

  I hope this doesn't offend you but..I feel he is entitled because he is his father's son. Period, end of sentence.

  When you have children, they are your responsibility, whether the relationship they are born into works out or not. If the law in that state says till 21, I can't imagine this is new or it would not effect an older case, right? I mean, you had to know this going into the relationship that the man had to pay child support? If you knew that than on what grounds can you gripe about it now? Seems kind of cold to me to complain about it now if you knew it was in place when you got involved with him.

  I see the way that my daughter's step mother looks at me and I imagine, from the way she behaves at times, that she resents his paying child support too. But you know what? that's too bad. His kid, he pays a fraction of what it costs to support this child. A fraction. My husband, who is the step father, is the one REALLY supporting the child. But he doesn't complain. He knew that we would be a family when he married me.

  This is just my 2 cents from the other side of a support case...I will probably regret posting this.

  Did you ever also think that fighting the support may very well reinforce this kids negative view of you? I mean, it plays into the whole JW thing, don't you think? Seems to me that they'd use it to their advantage. If the kid gets into college, he might be able to break the brainwashing. Isn't that worth some money, for the chance at his freedom? Sounds to me like he's a typical dub kid, and he's probably conflicted more than you realize. I don't know him though so I prolly shouldn't speculate, it just sounds like you're more worried about the money than the kid from your post.

  essie
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  65

  so exhausted you can't rest

  by Utopian Reformist in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i have been on the road now since late march.

  i am in helsinki, finland and am very very very tired.

  i am flying out again tomorrow to mexico city via london & atlanta, ga. i will be working in mexico city until the 27th of may.

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  Fleur

  Oh Mario. Your post breaks my heart.

  I wish that you would please, please, please talk to someone professional...don't give up...

  I can't imagine the grief you live with, I won't insult you by telling you that I can. Just know please that people really care, okay?

  hugs

  essie
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  35

  HEY I HAVE SOME GREAT NEWS!

  by jaredg in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have found one of my old jw friends from when i was a teenager.

  i discovered her on myspace and wrote her message and it turns out that she is out of the religion and doing well.

  this is the first time i have met one of my friends from my inner circle who has left the jw religion...i'm so excited!

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  Fleur

  
  Welcome KimberB! :)

  Jared, posts like this just make me smile all day long. I never give up hoping that someday...one of my dearest friends will contact me to tell me she's out. I already have two dear friends (more like family really) who left after I did, I saw them recently and it was so incredible. We're free, we're free.

  I'm so happy for both of you, true friendship is something worth savoring, cherishing, and fighting for in this life. Thanks for telling us your happy news!!!

  big hugs!
  
  essie

  p.s. when I saw the post title I thought for sure you were going to say that you saved "just saved a bunch of money by switching your car insurance to Geico" LOL
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  21

  Were any of you ever...

  by LaCatolica in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  ...teased, harrassed, tormented in school because you were jw and couldn't participate in what other students participated in?

  how old were you when it began to happen?

  how did you feel and how did you react to it?

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  Fleur

  
  I was beat up, put down and tormented by other students, humiliated by teachers, every time something came up that showed I was different. Nope, I didn't get to stay home. I think once or twice my mom picked me up early on days they were gonna have a Halloween party. Eventually we were taken out of public school but those years in were pure hell.

  The last year wasn't so bad...my teacher was Jewish and she felt sorry for me when the kids would be mean...she would send me on errands for her and got me a special program signed up at the library so I didn't have to sit there doing nothing when they were drawing christmas trees and having birthday parties...she was a nice lady, I wonder what ever became of her.

  essie
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  27

  What do you consider yourself?

  by poodlehead in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have wondered how each of you classifies yourself.

  as regards to religion.

  this is for my own person interest.

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  Fleur

  They had me as a zygote. And I will never belong to another organized religion again. I have stopped believing in the duality between the Divine and mankind. I guess you could say to put it in plain terms, I kind of believe in the Force. Everything is connected, there is no separation.

  I feel most peaceful this way. I don't have to claim I know it all, because no matter if people think they do, no one does. We are all students in this life. What we become in the next...I guess I'll find out when I get there.

  Welcome to the forum, Poodlehead!

  essie
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  30

  I've had it. I want to DA myself

  by White Waves in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  but i am afraid to send a letter to my old kh.

  what should i write to make sure they don't just df me?

  also, they refused my request to da myself before.

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  Fleur

  Um, guys, I have to offer another experience here...somebody (forgive me I forgot who LOL) said

  How can they do that? If you write a letter saying you reject the teachings of the WTS and no longer consider yourself a JW, then you are DAd. Period.

  I wrote that letter. They ignored it and announced me as df'd when I refused to meet with the judicial committee kangaroo court. If your family is too high-profile or your exit is too scandalous, then they will choose to ignore your DA letter.

  The PO's DIL was not going to be allowed to quit, she had to be fired. It still irks me a bit. I went out on my terms, not theirs, and people don't know it.

  essie

  who quit before she was freaking fired, already!
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  49

  My Birthday

  by Farkel in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  .

  today is my birthday.

  i'm 58.. i don't feel a year older than i did yesterday.. farkel, who is 25 at heart.......

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  Fleur

  How is YOUR life on the planet Zolotone, anyway?

  ROFLMAO! Fark, this is why we love ya. Well, one of the reasons.

  Happy, happy birthday my dear! We are the same sign, I wonder what that means if anything LOL ;)

  hugs

  essie