BrendaCloutier

Joined

• started 142 topics
• posted 4,392 times   see topics posted on
• send a message

Posts by BrendaCloutier

• 
  76

  How much harm have you caused your congregation?

  by Joker10 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  how much harm did you cause to the people in your congregation?

  everybody complains how the witnesses did this and that and in the process caused so much harm.

  but what you don't say is how much pain you caused others while you were in.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  BrendaCloutier

  When I left, the ones I 'harmed' were the ones who actually had some (conditional) love for me: My mother-in-law, although she saw and understood the problems in that congregation; my parents, who adopted me and raised me JW, and had to hear all of the "poor so-n-so's daughter is no longer associated". I suppose my sister and brother, and their families, but my brother never did like me as I usurped his baby-of-the-family possition, and went out of his way to ignore my existence even when I was in good standing.

  I like this thread. I like the idea of owness and looking at ourselves and our actions even if the collective "we" were vicitimized by a cult mindset. The ol' "whenever one finger points, three are pointing back at you" thing.

  Hugs

  Brenda
• 
  45

  Do You Feel That Stereotyping Nationalities Is Necessarily Wrong?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  politically correct, it isn't----but do you think there's any validity to "stereotyping" people or backgrounds??

  ?

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  BrendaCloutier

  I am hispanic and my tortillas come out like the shape of Florida

  That's why they have tortillaria's. I buy mine. But I have yet to find really good tortillas mais in Portland, Oregon. So I stick with harina....

  Bren
• 
  27

  Whats the Biggest JW contradiction?

  by sleepy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  what do you think the biggest contradiction was in jw teaching or logic?

  i remember people confronted us with the argument that maybe over thousands of years the bible has changed, we would probably say any changes were minor, and we have the dead sea scrolls etc that don't vary much from the bible today.

  yet when asked by people with a little knowledge about the bible why the name jehovah was not in any manuscripts of the new testament, we would effectivly says its because they have been changed over time.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  BrendaCloutier

  "Celebration of the Lord's Evening Meal" (makes funerals look like a Frat party)

  ROFLMAO! I always hated memorial. So very boring, stuffy, overcrowded, and uncomfortable.

  bren
• 
  9

  My dog snores louder than me

  by Cygnus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have a seven month old chocolate brown lab and it snores so loud it shakes the room.

  it must be getting back at me for my noisy sleep habits.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  BrendaCloutier

  I've taken to wearing earplugs at night to limit the effects of the Mr. and his snoring. We got a Bowling Ball Bed so when one of us is having a restless night it doesn't disturb the other.

  My CAT snores louder than I do, but not the Mr.

  Bren
• 
  45

  Do You Feel That Stereotyping Nationalities Is Necessarily Wrong?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  politically correct, it isn't----but do you think there's any validity to "stereotyping" people or backgrounds??

  ?

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  BrendaCloutier

  Very difficult question. Can you judge all JW's by their brainwashing, er, training? At least JW's are generally passive, and of mixed racial backgrounds, albeit with homocidal/suicidal tendencies.

  The tough one is ***please I do not intend to insult ANYONE exept maybe a JW*** rabid Jihad supporting people, most commonly of middle eastern descent, and not stereotyping a man of middle eastern descent with a fuse dangling from his shoe, or trying to sneek a boxcutter on board an airliner, or taking westerners hostage and beheading them.

  However, that's not to say that EVERY person on middle eastern descent is a rabid Jihad supporting idiot. There have been pleanty of rabid christians and jews in history, too. Isn't Dubya a christian?

  IMHO

  Brenda
• 
  47

  SHOW DOWN TODAY

  by Corvin in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  today, i am taking the girls to meet with the court appointed attorney.

  he will interview the girls and me together, then he will interview sara and the girls together.

  it is his recommendation to the judge that will decide the outcome of this custody battle.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  BrendaCloutier

  That won't happen if I play all nice and kissy-face with those involved.

  I also see where you really did try this tactic and no way your #)$%* ex-wife was willing to compromise. I really do understand the insanity you're trying to protect your children from.

  -Bren
• 
  47

  SHOW DOWN TODAY

  by Corvin in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  today, i am taking the girls to meet with the court appointed attorney.

  he will interview the girls and me together, then he will interview sara and the girls together.

  it is his recommendation to the judge that will decide the outcome of this custody battle.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  BrendaCloutier

  Just fyi, her recovery includes dad getting involved in counseling.

  {{{ Corvin }}} I'm glad you're involved in counseling. Actually, I figured you probably were. After I posted, I realized I was probably a bit sharp. A reaction to the "dissagreement" between you and LT. No insult intended. I don't think anyone on this board harbors ill-will toward you, and only wants the best.

  Heck, I think most exJW's need therapy. Few of us know how to get along in the world unless we've been around the block a few times and have attempted to figure out how it really works. My spousal unit and I see a relationship therapist 2x a year for tuneups. I seek counseling from a friend/neighbor if I'm not sure what's appropriate. She happens to think I'm one of the more "normal" and "well balanced" people she knows. Maybe I should see someone else? But, then again, my psych nurse who I see for my anti-depressants thinks I'm pretty well balanced also, as long as I take my meds . Normal is just a setting on a washing machine.

  I am and have been concerned about your anger. If you have it controlled, GREAT! Anger is a by-product of fear. Once the adrenalin and other chemicals get flowing, they can be difficult to manage. I know, I've been there. I wanted to burn some a-h's house down because he caused an auto accident that got pinned on me. It took a lot of work to learn to be angry in a "appropriate" manner. Anger, and I'm sure you're aware, can be highly destructive. To the self and any and all surrounding the self.

  I want the best outcome for you and your family. I'd absolutely love it if the court ordered Sara into therapy, both for her own good, whether it will do any good or not, and for the conflict it will cause her Most of us know what JW's think about therapy.

  Hugs and only the best. You deserve it, and are overdue.

  Brenda

  PS how the heck do you change colours? I hit the colour key and everything changes to red and I didn't want to flame anyone.
• 
  47

  SHOW DOWN TODAY

  by Corvin in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  today, i am taking the girls to meet with the court appointed attorney.

  he will interview the girls and me together, then he will interview sara and the girls together.

  it is his recommendation to the judge that will decide the outcome of this custody battle.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  BrendaCloutier

  Like, whoa!! This is totally uncool. Since when does a dude need, like, a threapist for totally saving his awsome little grommies from a gnarly, grody, psycho beeyotch and that lame-o church? Duhh. Yeah, he's like, wicked pissed. Just 'cuz a dude needs to leak a lil' anger to his bro's does'nt mean he's gonna bum out everyones trip and go, like, totally Tony Montana on everbody. Cool?

  Corvin admitted a need to vent in this forum. That's kewl. But when there is as much psychological warfare and BS going on in Corvin's world, to have a trained head to bounce off of, especially someone who is skilled in cult recovery, doesn't hurt. It's a JW (and many born-againers) thing to be against professional help. And as exJW's we all need a little guidance and balance now and then

  To have a professional doesn't mean that a person is f'reek'n nutz, just that they are wise enough to seek professional counsel. What's so uncool about seek out professional counsel? Anger and rage are sometimes difficult to get past when there is a desprite need to act logically. It's not uncommon to lash out at someone trying to help when enraged. I know, I've been there myself with JW parents. And Covin is very angry right now. Rightfully so, but right don't cut it if you loose, and he needs his head about him.
• 
  47

  SHOW DOWN TODAY

  by Corvin in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  today, i am taking the girls to meet with the court appointed attorney.

  he will interview the girls and me together, then he will interview sara and the girls together.

  it is his recommendation to the judge that will decide the outcome of this custody battle.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  BrendaCloutier

  {{{{{{{{{ Corvin }}}}}}}}}} {{{{{{{{{{{{{ LittleToe }}}}}}}}}}}}

  Ok, guys, dudes, whatever. Enough already.

  I can see both sides here: Corvin venting on this forum because it's inappropriate to vent elsewhere (Corvin, think about getting a therapist, you need one inspite of yourself), and LittleToe was bringing up valid questions. Afterall, it IS about the children involved.

  Corvin - I'm glad you've adopted the Crow or Raven shield. I don't know if you were already aware of the similarities in your name and the latin genis, but the Corvid's spirit will help as crow travels between the worlds, and raven is one of the Great Mystery's messengers. Your message will get across. (For those who balk, this is based on Native American - indian - wisdom from a variety of tribes.)

  I have been praying for the whole lot of you: Corvin and your family, and Sara, and her family. God's (He, She, It, They) blessings to you all. You need them.

  Hugs and love

  Brenda
• 
  26

  Pathological fears?

  by Brummie in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  what do you fear the most?.

  we were relocating a person who works with us to another place , turns out she had a pathological fear of dwarfs and since one worked there she came running back to us.... not sure i have any real pathological fears, however i remember having to get out of pitsburgh due to the high buildings, then i couldnt stay in new york when i saw the hight of the twin towers and other buildings, dont know if i was pathologically scared or just totally overwhelmed.. anyway, whats your fear?.

  brummie

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  BrendaCloutier

  I have a little claustraphobia that comes on in the strangest places - like snorkeling - feeling closed in by the mask, and limited oxegen.

  I'm not afraid of heights at all. I am very much afraid of falling. As long as I feel even the slightest bit secure, I'm fine. Example: Riding up on a ski lift is fine. Getting off on that ramp at the end is a killer for me.

  I developed deformed feet (pes cavis) while growing up, and had a difficult time with balance, so I was always falling. On flat ground, up or down stairs. I still have difficulty with walking DOWN long staircases.

  Snorkeling this phobia came up also, because the "ground" was so far below me and I was floating insecurely above it!

  Spiders, snakes, lizzards, rodents, bugs... bring 'em on! I held a beautiful and large tarantual when we were in Mexico last winter. Really kewl creature! So docile. He enjoyed being petted. Kevan just couldn;'t even look because of his arachniphobia.

  Hugs

  Brenda