MelbaToast

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Posts by MelbaToast

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  13

  Baptist funerals vs. JW funerals

  by jws in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i went to a funeral at a 1st baptist church this past weekend.

  it was for the son of a former co-worker.

  travis was 18 and was about to start his senior year in high school.

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  MelbaToast

  Undaunted Danny:

  Im so sorry you had to find out about your mom that way. How much more painful can a loss get?

  my $.02:

  My JW father died in 2001. He was cremated, and they had a "memorial" for him at my moms KH. So I had to go, because I was the daughter and mom did not involve her kids in the final funeral arrangements. She was catatonic for the most part. But the kicker was that the elder that gave the memorial eulogy said "Im sure Patty(my mom) and Lief (my brother) and their two daughters (Me and My Sister who are both df'd) can use our encouragement"

  What a loving arrangement WHEN THEY WONT EVEN UTTER YOUR NAME. (sorry it makes me scream just thinking about it)

  Even funnier: Lots of people from the congregation came to my moms house afterward. Not one (excluding family and my dads worldly friends) JW would even express their sorrow to me or my sis. The rest of my family saw it and they were disgusted. I went outside and drank a beer and smoked a cigarette in the garage while they were there. THen I came in the house and stared at all of em. I made sure that they would be as uncomfortable as possible.
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  17

  This is your subconscious speaking...

  by seattleniceguy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  many of us have had the experience of our subconscious trying to send us messages.

  sometimes we refuse to listen and it has to resort to more forceful measures, even making us physically ill. for example, while in the final throes of my witness-ism, i found that i would get horribly painful sore throats within seconds of repressing a thought about something that challenged my faith in a way i could not legitimately dispute.

  it was as though my brain was saying, "you need to think about this, now," and then punishing me for refusing to do so.. i was wondering if anyone has experiences like this.

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  MelbaToast

  Funny side note JamesThomas....

  Your name is the name of the elder that headed my JC to df me....just seeing that name sent shivers....
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  100

  Kingdom Hall Spankings

  by JH in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  most meetings i went to, children were brought to the washrooms in the back to be disciplined.

  often i could hear a child yell or cry due to the spanking given by the parent.

  people in the hall would have that look on their face meaning that it was alright to discipline a child by spanking him.

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  MelbaToast

  Reading all these stories brings up vile memories for me...repress and forget, that how I deal

  Many times I was beaten "in the back" for fidgiting, talking, etc. My last beating was at the age of 14 in th KH, mom got me up (I was giggling at a special talk about masturbation)...she took me outside and took off her belt, she said if I screamed that she would keep it up.

  I sat in the bathroom for the rest of the meeting and decided I hated them. and the hall. And what they had done to me. Soon later I told my mother I would leave as soon as I was 18, and asked her what I should do in Gym class while changing ( I hat strap marks on the back of my legs) I told her that I would tell em that she hurt me. Besides a few slaps in the face, my mom never beat me again.

  I always got dissaproving looks from the elders, no matter what I did after that..."bad seed" I guess. Get this, I even went in service after school on Mondays and Weds (opposite tues and thur meettings) And they wonder why so many ex-jw kids end up depressed, sucidial, or abusers themselves.......

  Can we stop this thread? Makes me just angry.

  "Go Forward, and be Miserable, all you Believers of LIES"
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  14

  First Year Blues

  by MelbaToast in

  1. social
  2. family

  this really doesnt have anything to do with jws, but i needed to vent.. .

  i am going crazy i think...lemme just blurt it out.

  my husband and i just had a baby last december and we're having problems.

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  MelbaToast

  Thanks guys....I really love this board!

  guess Ill have to post more to up my status, Im trying but so many time the things Im thinking have already been said by someone else, I dont want to be a myna bird :)

  Havent talked to hubby yet, but our moods change like the wind (we're both geminis) and right now I am on break from school so its relaxing just hanging out and chilling, we rented scary movie 3 last night and just hung out togeth, sometimes its just the little things that makes marriage worthwhile...I never thought Id feel like that, but we have the pure caring for each other (we're best friends) that is hard to find in a mate :)

  So much for leading my "life of sin"...Im married and have a kid, so all em hippo-crites at the KH can kiss it :) And I still love God (after many years of soul-searching after the cult)

  *Melba gives big razzberries and flips off the old congo" Nahnahnahnahnah!!!!

  "Go Forward and Be Miserable, All You Life-Suckers"
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  14

  First Year Blues

  by MelbaToast in

  1. social
  2. family

  this really doesnt have anything to do with jws, but i needed to vent.. .

  i am going crazy i think...lemme just blurt it out.

  my husband and i just had a baby last december and we're having problems.

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  MelbaToast

  BTW, thanx for all the support, frenchy and others! Its great to go somewhere where I feel understood.
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  14

  First Year Blues

  by MelbaToast in

  1. social
  2. family

  this really doesnt have anything to do with jws, but i needed to vent.. .

  i am going crazy i think...lemme just blurt it out.

  my husband and i just had a baby last december and we're having problems.

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  MelbaToast

  YOu know what is really weird.....this crap wasnt happening before HE was put on effexor and I think this is a side effect....hes mentioned that hed like to get off of the med (for other reasons) but it helps with his anxiety management so much!!!

  *stuck between a rock and hard place*
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  14

  First Year Blues

  by MelbaToast in

  1. social
  2. family

  this really doesnt have anything to do with jws, but i needed to vent.. .

  i am going crazy i think...lemme just blurt it out.

  my husband and i just had a baby last december and we're having problems.

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  MelbaToast

  Bored with Hannah? No Way. Shes a light in my life, always keeps us hopping. Nah its more like "I'm so freaking tired" ( Im going to school also to become an RN) I think that maybe my hubby is getting a complex about my schooling. Everyonce in awhile he makes a statement like "once you become a nurse, you'll find someone better than me" I get tired of reaffirming to him that I am not going anywhere, plus the bs of "poor me" is irritating. Then I chide myself, thinking I am not doing something right, maybe I am not paying enough attention to him......

  and the circle continues.....
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  14

  First Year Blues

  by MelbaToast in

  1. social
  2. family

  this really doesnt have anything to do with jws, but i needed to vent.. .

  i am going crazy i think...lemme just blurt it out.

  my husband and i just had a baby last december and we're having problems.

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  MelbaToast

  He names Johannah...Hannah for short....thanks, she is a cutie and such a happy one too. Heres another pic with her glasses, thats my hubby holding her.
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  14

  First Year Blues

  by MelbaToast in

  1. social
  2. family

  this really doesnt have anything to do with jws, but i needed to vent.. .

  i am going crazy i think...lemme just blurt it out.

  my husband and i just had a baby last december and we're having problems.

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  MelbaToast

  This really doesnt have anything to do with JWs, but I needed to vent.

  I am going crazy I think...lemme just blurt it out. My husband and I just had a baby last December and we're having problems

  or not. I cant decide.

  Do you ever get a "wierd" feeling in the bottom of your stomach like something is wrong, but you just cant pinpoint it? Thats me. Hubby loves me, loves the baby, I love him, we're happy......

  But I feel bored, kinda like the seven year itch....btw, weve been together 6 years. We don't argue or fight. Actually on both of our parts there isnt much dialog going on...we talk, but he seems the same as me right now...bored. I don't know what to do really. This is the longest relationship I've ever been in and we have never had problems before. PLEASE someone tell me Im not nuts, actually thinking about getting on meds again (is it my problem?)
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  11

  more Hillbilly...

  by hillbilly in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  sorry i got to get this out.... late nights i hear her calling.

  the house quiet , her voice is clear.

  the memories uninvited.

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  MelbaToast

  Hehehe! :)

  I love that song, I was singing along as I read....And Ill hang around as long as you will let me.....Thats right up there with the "ring of fire" and "crazy" in my favorite country songs list