BeautifulGarbage

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Posts by BeautifulGarbage

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  40

  What is your worst fear?

  by Scully in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  a recent death in my family triggered my worst fear - as irrational as it may sound - into a very real possibility.. let me explain: as a global culture, we simply accept that when someone dies, those who care about them will want to gather and offer a meaningful tribute to the person and those who survive them.

  with regard to my recently deceased family member - her own children decided against holding a memorial service for her surviving family, which included two children and their respective spouses, eight grandchildren, and seven great grandchildren.

  yes, we are spread out over 2000 miles.

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  BeautifulGarbage

  I've come very close twice. Burying one of my children.

  Losing my husband, young.

  Andee

  Sorry for the blank post. I still can't get this new board to edit.
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  40

  What is your worst fear?

  by Scully in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  a recent death in my family triggered my worst fear - as irrational as it may sound - into a very real possibility.. let me explain: as a global culture, we simply accept that when someone dies, those who care about them will want to gather and offer a meaningful tribute to the person and those who survive them.

  with regard to my recently deceased family member - her own children decided against holding a memorial service for her surviving family, which included two children and their respective spouses, eight grandchildren, and seven great grandchildren.

  yes, we are spread out over 2000 miles.

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  BeautifulGarbage
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  20

  Michael Jackson Sleeps With Kids(not his)

  by TR in

  1. watchtower
  2. child-abuse

  michael jackson has "slept in a bed with many children.

  " what a friggin' weirdo.. http://apnews1.iwon.com//article/20030204/d7ovt4eo0.html.

  tr

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  BeautifulGarbage

  I was highly critical of MJ on another thread and I stand by those comments.

  Fact: MJ is a 44 year old grown male.

  The guys upbringing and talent are irrelevant in regard to whether or not he has children, other than his own, sleeping in bed with him. If this were MJ the 44 year old plumber living down the street, people would never so easily dismiss his behavior. Nobody would care that he had a difficult childhood,etc. The police would be called and parents would be in an uproar.

  how many parents out there have ever had their child sleep with them in bed?

  Are you considered a pedophile for doing so?

  The act of an adult sleeping (as in literally falling asleep) with a child in the bed is not a crime.

  
  Most parents have had their own children sleep with them at one time or another. Usually because the kids are scared or something is bothering them. However, I have NEVER, and nobody that I know of, has ever had someone else's children sleep in their bed. If a child is frightened, or having some other difficulty, I think it much more appropriate that child's parent(s) are called to come get them and take them home so that they, themselves, can comfort them. If this can't be done, then perhaps they can go into another room sit on the couch to that the kid can be comforted. Yes, the bedroom, and especially the bed, is symbolic for sexual activity. Even though nothing sinister would happen, I would take them into the livingroom and comfort them there.

  No, I don't think someone should be labeled a pedophile because they have a kid sleeping in their bed. However, I do think that some very serious questions should be asked. I always views things from the standpoint: What is in the best interests of the child? The adult's needs are irrelevant. This extends to parents and their own children, also. For example, if a single parent is feeling lonely, they request their child sleep with them to lessen the pain of being alone. The child is being used inappropriately by the adult to alleviate their own emotional suffering. I think that children being used in that way is not healthy for the adult, and especially for the child.

  No, it's not a crime. For me, it is MJ's reasons for having children sleeping with him. Even if those reasons are "innocent" it's still not something that a responsible adult would do with someone else's children. MJ has made it clear this is something he does on a regular basis.

  There's no question Michael leads a very different life than most. It's also quite evident that he is now a product of his upbringing, fame and mental state. Period. YOU don't know what it's like and never will. I KNOW what it's like for people with mental illnesses. It's CRAZY...their minds do not function the way ours does, and what's worse is that instead of sympathy they get the opposite - ridicule. And when you are constantly ridiculed, it's very crushing, especially if it is over something you cannot help. (I was picked on a LOT as a kid and it had long lasting effects)

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  Again, upbringing, fame, and mental state are not an excuse to inappropriately use children to meet an adult's needs. Even more so if someone has a mental illness. Proper therapy needs to be sought. Many of us on this board have experienced abuse and cruelty from those that were suppose to protect and love us. Myself included. I do know what it is like. My father was/is a sociopath. No, I wasn't famous. Still, fame is not an excuse for his behavior. I think that MJ gets an abundance of sympathy. However, mine stops dead when children are exploited. Granted, MJ has done some great things for sick children but, if he is mentally ill, I would question any parent's sanity in allowing their child to be alone with him.

  Do I think MJ is trying to teach kids that it's okay to sleep with adults? No. I think that MJ is desperately trying to capture and create something he feels he was denied. A healthy, loving, childhood. You have no idea how much I understand this. Still, his childhood is gone and he cannot get it back. Period. If he wants to create a world of amusement parks, castles, and endless "fun" he is certainly entitled to for himself. He is not entitled to use children to relieve the pain of his own childhood suffering. Even if he motives are pure. And if a child feels they need to be in bed with MJ to feel better, if it is due to serious emotional problems, then a competent therapist should be sought.

  Not MJs bed.

  Andee
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  46

  Jehovah's Witnesses Can Go To Hell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  by Big Tex in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i need someplace to vent, so excuse me but i am very angry at the moment.

  as most of you know, my father in law committed suicide last sunday (the 16th).

  his death hit nina hard, but i've discovered this week that my sweet little kitten of a wife has the heart of a lion.

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  BeautifulGarbage

  Dear Big Tex and Nina,

  I read this thread a couple of days ago and I just didn't know how to respond through my tears. I'm just so sorry. To have to experience such a tragedy with such awful circumstances surrounding it. I'm glad to know you found strength here to able to withstand the JW callousness and down right cruelty. The service you provided was, indeed, fitting and appropriate.

  Warm wishes to you both and your family.

  andee
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  18

  Poll

  by patio34 in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  what to wear to attract the opposite sex

  this is from the book how to make anyone fall in love with you.. in a study, both men and women were shown pictures of members of the opposite sex.

  some of the people in photos wore chic upscale clothes, and others wore less expensive ones that ranged from cheap to downright cheesy.

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  BeautifulGarbage

  Hi Pat,

  I watched a show on the Discovery Channel a few years ago that also supported that information. Especially regarding women wanting financially established males because instinctually they think their offspring would be supported properly.

  I'm also not suprised about the findings regarding males. I think the style of clothing is much more important to females than to males. It's done more to impress and compete with other woman. I seem to remember from this same program that males are instinctually attracted to women with wider hips because that signals fertility and an ability to carry many children. Still, I knew of plenty of amorous males that would gladly lower their standards of what is attractive to get some action. Especially at closing time.

  Again, we humans have the capability to think beyond our instincts. Take the well dressed dude, for instance. He may spend most of his paycheck on fancy clothes and still live at home with Mom. Or, the guy with the fancy sports car may barely be able to make the lease payments and has maxed out all of his credit cards.

  When I was in the early twenties I worked with a number of men that fit the above description. They had an abundance of flash, and style, with a healthy dose of expensive tastes. It's easy to have when you live in my area. Unfortunately, they didn't make a salary to match. They always seemed to have plenty of girlfriends, though!

  So, what did us young female bankers do? Well, when we had a good looking single male client, we would check his bank accounts. Mind you, we were not impressed with a large balance on a particular day. We wanted AVERAGES. Six months and year. It was our vow that we would never want to date a guy that had a bank account averages that were lower than ours!

  Andee
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  32

  How Did You Find This Forum?

  by SpannerintheWorks in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i found this forum whilst perusing the panorama web site.

  the link is half way down on the right:.

  http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/programmes/panorama/2114320.stm.

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  BeautifulGarbage

  After shunning my Non JW family for decades, my JW family decided to get in touch.

  I did a search on Jehovahs witnesses to get a refresher on how nutty they are and found Randy's Freeminds site. I found the link to here, lurked for a few months, and Wa la!

  Andee
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  36

  Today

  by Scully in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  today is the day i realize that i'm being toyed with.

  i hate being a pawn.

  i hate feeling like people have had nothing more than a phony selfish reason for having any interest in me.

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  BeautifulGarbage

  For the lady that always seems to have an abundance of wisdom, intelligence, and class, I wish I had something to share that would shed light into why life on the outside can suck so bitterly at times.

  I'll stay until the noise of my own thoughts subsides. I'll stay until it's safer to be outside than inside.

  
  
  I hope that sharing your thoughts with us will make the outside safe faster than it would be otherwise.

  Take care,
  Andee
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  6

  Dr. Phil says "time for a new church"

  by Mulan in

  1. watchtower
  2. scandals

  on yesterday's dr. phil show, he was talking to a couple and the husband had had multiple illicit affairs.

  phil was counseling them on surviving this in their marriage.

  he said this: "do i understand correctly that you were kicked out of your church?

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  BeautifulGarbage

  Hi Mulan,

  I saw the show too, and wondered if there was a JW connection with that couple. It sounded so familiar. "Leave and don't come back" I believe is what they said.

  Another thing that struck me was when the woman related that she had lost all of her friends because she stayed with her husband. JW connection? Not sure. A dear friend of mine, not a JW, found out her spouse was cheating and she made the decision that she wanted to salvage the marriage. He was very sorry and they went to marriage counseling for nearly a year. Out of all of her friends, I was the only one that supported her through such a trying time. Everyone else told her she was "stupid" and an "idiot" for not leaving him on the spot. It hurt her deeply to be abandoned by "friends".

  Andee
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  31

  Hairy? Where? Do you Like it Hairy?

  by teenyuck in

  1. social
  2. relationships
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  BeautifulGarbage

  Woman on the other hand should.

  Why?
  

  #2, one of the women on Joe Millionaire had hairy pits, it was gross...

  Why?

  Why is hair on a woman's armpits and legs, deemed gross? There is nothing more germy or dirty about it than what grows on a man's body. I find it interesting the extreme reactions of American woman when it comes to normal female body hair. Social conditioning on what constitutes femininity is extremely strong on this one, even though it has no basis in reality.

  It hasn't been that long since they finally stopped shaving women's pubic hair when giving birth. Wanted to keep the process "clean", you know. Even though women have been giving birth for thousands of years with hair.

  As for men? I like medium hair on the chest and on the legs. I like it their head too.

  Andee
  
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  18

  Did you know: some states will force blood transfusions on your child

  by joe_from_kokomo in

  1. watchtower
  2. medical

  one of my children is facing surgery, and when we went in for pre-op discussions and tests, we met with the anesthesiologist's assistant.

  of course, we told her we were jws, and noted that on the questionaire form, but she was quick to inform me that in my state, blood transfusions can be administered to minor children in spite of the parent's objections, even if they are jws.

  state law precedent has been set in this matter, and they will get a court order if needed.. .

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  BeautifulGarbage

  Though not a JW at the time, when my daughter was diagnosed with Acute Leukemia, I asked the hospital social worker what would they do if I refused transfusions of blood products for her. I was curious because I had JW family and JW co-workers. It was stated to me the matter would be taken to court and an order to give the transfusions would be granted whether I approved or not.

  Another little side note: People are rarely given whole blood. Generally, it's fractions. Red blood cells, platets, etc.

  Of course, there's that little matter of infants getting their Mother's white blood cells from breastmilk.....