bikerchic

Joined

• started 100 topics
• posted 5,117 times   see topics posted on
• send a message

Posts by bikerchic

• 
  31

  Do you Sudoku?

  by BlackSwan of Memphis in

  1. social
  2. entertainment

  i tried the one in the newspaper the other day and just about solved it.

  but thought i should start small and work my way up to get a better understanding of how it's played.. so i picked up a sudoku mag at target the other day.

  it's an easy one and i'm really getting the hang of it and enjoying it.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  bikerchic

  I'm hooked too!

  I do the one that comes in our local newspaper daily. *blush* I have bought a book full of 'em too, love it!
• 
  14

  Bridge to Terabithia

  by Simon in

  1. social
  2. entertainment

  just been to the flics to see this - i think i was probably about 12 the last time i cried in public!

  omg ... what a moving film!

  well worth going to see but take a hanky ...

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  bikerchic

  On my must see list!

  Just been to the flics to see this - I think I was probably about 12 the last time I cried in public!
  
  OMG ... what a moving film!
  
  Well worth going to see but take a hanky ...

  Angharad is that you under Simon's account?
• 
  4

  Where's that first thread detailing the new WT format?

  by Apostate Kate in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  anyone have it saved?

  does anyone know if there will be copywrite laws concerning the magazine that will be for the jw's only or any other reasons they are changing it?.

  kate.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  bikerchic

  Try this link Kate:

  http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/129215/1.ashx

  I'm looking for another thread where the actual letter was posted and will post it when I find it.
• 
  15

  AL-ANON and Me

  by compound complex in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  dear friends,.

  i have begun reading one day at a time in al-anon, hoping it will help me deal with an alcoholic's destructive behavior, which has been visited upon me and friends for too long a time.

  obviously we care about him, but his influence with or without alcohol has shaken us badly.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  bikerchic

  robic I experienced the same things as what you said at AL-ANON meetings;

  I (and others) secretly feel they have given up one addiction (alchohol) for another (AL-ANON).

  After leaving one cult I wasn't about to jump into another.....that said I do understand why a recovering alcoholic needs to immerse themselves in a new life style, but at some point they really need to put what they have learned to use and live life without a crutch ie; alcohol or the need for an organization.

  blondie:

  I went more to ACOA meetings (Adult Children of Alcoholics). It actually was my first step towards leaving the WTS. I received much help and support, things that I had not found in the WTS.

  That was the beginning of my leaving the WTS as well. I also liked the format of the ACOA group (at least the one I was in) which was really helpful in that they would call you to task and not let you get away with stinking thinking™. What I found and didn't like about AL-ANON was how they wouldn't call a person on their repetitive bad actions and just listen to their stories and at the end thank them for sharing......I found this to be defeating and not helpful at all. What were we there for if not to really help a person see that they are just repeating what got them in AL-ANON in the first place? AL-ANON calls this cross talking I just didn't get it and it kept the person stuck I could only figure out that eventually after being stuck and miserable for so long the person would figure it out for themselves and finally figure out how they contributed to their own downfall. How many times must a person fall in a hole before realizing they shouldn't go down that path again? I guess I liked the way ACOA brought the hole to the person and made them realize it was the wrong path and nip it in the bud fast!

  AL-ANON also does not let you use any material or discuss anything which is not AL-ANON approved which was a red flag to me. There is so much good material out there which can help a person learn about the what's, why's and where to go for help out there yet they capitalized on my way or the highway approach which I didn't like.

  Bottom line is if AL-ANON is helping you now you just might out grow it and please be open to other avenues of healing, dealing and coping with the addict in your life, it's not the end all and you can get caught up in the endless doing this and that with the organization (AL-ANON) that you are just another spoke in the wheel which reminded me too much of the WTS.
• 
  23

  A Big Miracle - God is Love

  by David ben Jesse in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  a big miracle

  i composed an instrumental song "god is love" and sent it as an mp3-file via email to a christian music publisher.

  every time the song was cut in half, the rest was missing.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  bikerchic

  Brownboy?
• 
  50

  Loosing Moms We Never Had

  by Sparkplug in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  when my mom first came to live with me, i begrudged it.

  i was angry.

  i left home at age 14 and that was fine by me.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  bikerchic

  ((((((Decki)))))

  I can't tell you what an emotional roller coaster ride your story gave me, but I can tell you with tears streaming down my face that I have more than the deepest respect for you and the love you have shown your Mother over the years. You probably didn't see it as love but more as a damn duty......but I see a little girl still wanting to somehow please her Mom and get some kind of acknowledgement for doing it, maybe even a sincere thank you from her would be enough to make it worthwhile for you.

  I don't have to tell you that your Mother is mentally ill, you already know that all I can say is Decki how can you get blood out of a turnip? I totally feel for the caring person you are just wanting a normal Mom to do normal things with and not having to be put in the position of care taking your parent for such a long time (since you were 4) I can relate to that in more ways and I will try to tell you, bare with me. I'm not sure I would have it in me to do all that you have done and not be resentful for what you don't have in a Mother. Gawd this is bring up so much in me and I'm about to bore you with my experience.....I hope it helps you.

  First all resentment can eat you up, it can make you very physically, emotionally and spiritually ill and it can take years to get over it if you are lucky and it hasn't worked itself into a disease of some kind.

  I have a wonderful Mom and I'm am so glad beyond words to be able to say that today it wasn't always the way I felt about her. My Mom lived a life of not only a staunch JW but also as a very codependent person all tied up in what my Dad was or wasn't doing to the neglect of us kids. Our family legacy is one of neglect. I grew up not feeling loved and at the age of 4 realized that I was pretty much on my own....I became a very independent little girl which galled my Mother to know end needless to say we didn't get along very well, my older sister was wiser at playing our Mom and learned to be a people pleaser. My younger sister became invisible and had her own "friends" she is schizophrenic and now cares for our Mom on a daily basis and our Mom cares for her as well.....not sure who's zooming who??? But it's working for them for the time being and I'm thankful for that.

  Decki it took me years of therapy to get to the place where I could admit that I couldn't get blood from a turnip......or rather I couldn't get from my Mom all the things I needed (and I was an adult by this time) but she did have some things to offer me and for that I became grateful. ACOA has a saying which became my mantra "when nothing else works try gratitude."

  I remember the very day, the very place, and exactly what I was doing when I finally got it and was able to accept my Mother for who she is rather than what I wanted her to be and I knew I simply knew it was enough and some thing I could work with. It was an epiphany for me and it came hard learned by an independent little girl now a woman who surly didn't want to believe I would never have the Mom I wanted. What I have is a loving Mother who is limited in what she has to offer me and what I learned is that I as a Mother am also limited in what I have to offer and what I did give my children which makes me sad but then again I have to realize where I failed my own children I also gave them determination to be and do for themselves which isn't a bad thing and the goal after all is that we bring up independent children who can function regardless of what was given them. It may be my own rationalization about my own failures but I do know I tried my best with what I had to offer and I also know I try to console myself with that because I failed them miserably and I tried so hard not to, not to be my Mother yet I was some thing else. We can't be all things to all people and we will never be able to meet every one's needs and I hate that about myself, my limitations! Grrrr!

  Gratitude is a hard lesson to learn and it won't happen over night but you already have an insight on this;

  I can think of a few fun things and actually even if it is a bit sick, it is pretty damn funny to me how she described trying to rip her dogs head off..

  You've found humor even in it's sick way.....BTW I don't think it's sick it is what it is and can be pretty laughable unless you're the dog. Your Mom is teaching you things even if they aren't what you want right now I bet some where down the line you will draw on this experience and find you have a strength you didn't realize, it will happen. Plus I can't help but think of what YOU are teaching your children about responsibility to those whom we are related to even if we don't particularly care for them. Lesson's in life don't come when you are having a good time and every thing is wonderful those are times to just enjoy the moments, lessons life affirming lessons come when we are struggling mostly with ourselves to do the right thing when we want to run screaming from the room. We stay and do what needs to be done because it's human, it's necessary it's the right and dignified thing to do, not for our self but for someone else's benefit. You are an awesome person and you are doing a wonderful thing not for your Mother who doesn't remember, doesn't care, doesn't see but for your own children who are observing and learning from YOU!

  Hang in there girl and find the humor, let go of the resentment and be grateful for the little things which IMHO are part of the bigger picture. Can you imagine in your old age needing the kind of care you are giving your Mother from your children? Life's lessons, suck eh?

  You know I wish I lived closer to my Mom so I could have been there to help her as she was convalescing from her recent surgery, but no the "friends" from the KH helped her (somewhat) and my younger sister who drew from her own inner strength helped her even though it was probably hardest for her with her inabilities limited as they are helped her.

  Oh one other thing I would like to share with you which this brought up for me:

  I have not even hugged this woman since I was about 8 unless it was forced on me and here I am worrying if the elastic band on her panties is going to aggravate her rash ………

  Before my epiphany I started doing this thing we did in our ACOA group. Every time I saw my Mom I would give her a hug, this was funny because most of the time it was at the KH and my Mom is a very stoic person who hardly hugs. Her reaction at first was awkward and I wasn't sure I was doing the right thing or even doing it right! LOL But I kept on and I also never left her without giving her a hug and telling her I love her, no matter where we were. I really think this helped me get over it......funny thing is that now she and my younger sister have a nightly ritual of hugging each other before they retire each to their own apartments (they live close by) and can't go without doing this. Hum....

  Well this was a gut wrenching post for me and I hope it helps you but I mostly wanted to tell you that you are an incredible person doing an incredibly hard thing and I wish you all the strength you can draw up to continue on keep doing this:

  Lately though I just go through the routine with ease and I find that singing Afroman’s song http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=305vRNoofr8 while doing it keeps me laughing. She seems to like the tune and does not remember it in five minutes so it is all good.

  I think that's great! Hang in there Decki!

  sigh.............
• 
  27

  Trevor: Meditation

  by onacruse in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  in one type of meditation the mind is able to be fully conscious without he intrusion of words, which lead to thoughts,.

  trevor, i'm not trying to get on your ass here, but, please.... thoughts without words?

  that is a fundamental epistemological impossibility...rather like farting without emitting gas.. or, perhaps, we're talking about a purely personal "mystical" experience, which cannot be put into (and did not spring from, nor finds any possible formulation within) words?

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  bikerchic

  "The obtuse one" (aka Craig)

  Awe honey you task me......

  I'm not gifted with word but I know what I know and I remember what I've been shown or have read and this reading comes to mind from a Buddist nun Pema Chodron in her book The Places That Scare You in her Prolgue;

  When I teach, I begin with a compassionate aspiration, I express the wish that we will apply the teachings in our everyday lives and thus free ourselves and others from suffering.

  During the talk, I encourage the audience to keep an open mind, without preconception's. As the Zen master Suzuki Roshi put it; "In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities, but in the expert's there are few."

  At the end of the talk, I dedicate the merit of the occasion to all beings. This gesture of universal friendship has been likened to a drop of fresh spring water. If we put it on a rock in the sunshine, it will soon evaporate. If we put it in the ocean, however , it will never be lost. Thus the wish is made that we not keep the teachings to ourselves but use them to benefit others.

  This approach reflects what are called the three noble principles; good in the beginning, good in the middle, good at the end. The can be used in all the activities of our lives. We can begin anything we do--start our day, eat a meal, or walk into a meeting--with the intention to be open, flexible, and kind. Then we ca proceed with an inquisitive attitude. As my teacher Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche used to say, "Live your life as an experiment."

  At the end of the activity, whether we feel we have succeeded or failed in our intention, we seal the act by thinking of others, of those who are succeeding and failing all over the world. We wish that anything we learned in our experiment could also benefit them.

  In this spirit, I offer this guide on the training of the compassionate warrior. May it be of benefit at the beginning, in the middle, and at the end. May it help move us toward the places that scare us. May it inform our lives and help us to die with no regrets.

  trevor said:

  The whole point is to not allow words to enter the mind and start the thought process. It is the space that this uncovers that makes it possible to return to a default setting of calmness and peace. It is what silence is to noise. Sometimes this state of mind can cause emotions to enter the mind that have been held back by the activity of word driven thought. People who first attempt meditation find a lot of debris rising to the surface.

  It takes lots of practice to quiet the mind and it also takes a willing spirit to endure the process. Little by little you achieve a calmness which keeps you repeating the process until you finally achieve transformation and the calmness overtakes you and it's a high higher than any you've ever experienced with any mood altering substance which keeps you coming back for more, and this is the quencher for anyone who has truly reached it you come back not for the high but for the calmness of it all, where you just know all is well and you are okay and life doesn't seem such a burden anymore.

  It is not rocket science, in fact it is not science at all. It is about developing the ability to still the thinking process and make room for the awareness of the other factors that may be affecting our lives.

  Bingo! Life seems so much more refreshing when we stop struggling against the nature of reality and just accept what is, only then can we relax and be fully present for our lives.

  Craig said;

  My "point" is to understand your "point," and to allow myself to try to understand that there may be other ways of apprehending my universe, as foreign, and even illogical, as they may be to me.

  Not everything has logic to it, dare I say that the things which are most illogical are the by far the most poignant.

  You touch me with that. I think and think and think...sometimes I'd like to just blow off my head, especially as I consider that everything I've thought is just...well,

  And now honey I will say something you will probably really hate but from the words of Philip Knight.......just do it!
• 
  6

  MY NEW HANDLE!!!

  by Sister Golden Hair Surprise in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hi there everyone, i am the girl who had been writting under "messy" but i decided to change my name to sister golden hair surprise to reflect my personality in a more positive way since messy jessy was my nickname as a child and i am now a woman, and not so messy.

  my last post as messy is under the experiences/reunions etc.

  and it is a letter i wrote to the papers but isnt being published.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  bikerchic

  Hey there sista....please read thisTerms of use somewhere in all that gibberish it states no duplicate accounts.

  Please decide which account you wish to keep and the other one will be zapped asap.

  Thanks!
• 
  25

  ITHINKISEE birthday today!!!

  by freedomloverr in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  good morning fellow jwd'ers!

  it's my hubby's b-day today.

  we woke up to a beautiful dusting of snow and lots of time to just chill and go play today.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  bikerchic

  Enjoy your special day ITIS!
• 
  26

  Taking a break.......

  by fullofdoubtnow in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  .....not a very long one though.

  next weekend is a bit special for trev and i, and we are going off on holiday on sunday (25th) to spend 8 days relaxing on the meditterranean island of sardinia.

  we will be staying in villasimius, and there's a bit of info on that and the rest of the island on the link below.. http://www.discover-sardinia.com/regions/villasimius.htm.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  bikerchic

  Aloha,hoy! Have a great vacation and tell us all about it when you return!(hint,hint)