Posts by Thegoodgirl

37

Hello

by Amionne in

i just joined here so i'm not completely familiar with the forum code.

well, i'm going to be baptized in less than a month and i was wondering if i can find any friends among my peers or anyone around my age.

you see, my congregation was split up almost three years ago.

A big welcome to you! You are always welcome to talk to us. It is so hard when the congregation splits. Same happned in ours when I was 12. I was so sad my friends were all on the other side. But remember, you can be friends with teens in other congregations. Also, it helps to talk to other kids at school and such that are your age. It will be hard to fit in with the older teens. If you have a hard time, don't worry, it's not because you're a bad person, it's just the age difference. It really helped me when I started making friends with people in other congregations. Don't isolate yourself. I think chatting online helps too.

I got baptized when I was 13, and I was really stressed out at the time. Anyway, just know that even though you feel like "breaking down and crying" at times, things will get better. Keep associating with all types of people, keep an open mind. I know you are trying to do the right thing, sometimes it's hard to know what that is! You can send me a message anytime.

The good girl

39

Please advise.

by embalmed in

jw
friends

after years of waiting, i finally turned 18. i remember distinctly that my mother said during an argument that i would not have to attend meetings once i turned 18. well that was a lie.

she denied ever having said such, and pulled the "under my roof" card.

so now she is saying i have to continue attending meetings until i move out.

Thegoodgirl

I agree, you unfortunately have to move out if she tells you, but, when's your birthday? Did you graduate high school this month? Tell your mom, you are working on moving out, but don't jump into a bad situation. Carefully plan out your move. save money, maybe get some sane roomates with lofty goals like college. I think if you let your mom know you are working on getting out, she won't throw you out into the street the first meeting you miss. And I do like that idea of getting a job where you miss most meetings due to "schedule conflicts". I know my first job was being a CNA (nursing assistant). Not the most sought after career, but plenty of jobs. You can get an easy job by working as a personal nursing assistant to a pleasant elderly person in their own home versus working at a nursing home. That's what I did, it worked out fine, and there are plenty of night shifts. You can also work for a home health company who will help you find these jobs. Hopefully you'll be able to work your way through college with that and loans and hopefully some scholarships. Look for housing scholarships where they provide a place for you to stay during college. (That's also what I did, it was a lifesaver, and fun living with other college kids climbing out of a bad situation like me. Made some great friends.) Scholarship appliations are great places to tell your story that you are discouraged by your family and friends from pursuing higher education, but that's what you want to do. They love that stuff.

13

Good Grief - Life Celebration

by misspeaches in

jw
friends

oh this one is just crazy.. a guy i know in the cong i last associated with is having his 'life celebration' party on the 2nd july.

by strange co-incidence this is also the date that he turns 40 years old.

so everyone is off to have a party with him to celebrate his his life.

Thegoodgirl

Oh that is so crazy. Betcha someone will "get offended" at that one, and they will have a local needs talk about it, and then it will be banned forever.

15

Apologies for JW shunning

by greendawn in

jw
friends

you disassociated or got disfellowshipped and the jws were shunning you.

but then some of them went down the same road as you later.

did they then approach you as ex-jws and apologise for the way they had treated you, and what exactly did they have to say?

Thegoodgirl

Great topic. I have often thought of starting this one. Yes, for sure I want to say sorry for shunning, and especially sorry for reporting my friends to the elders. That was idiotic and ridiculous. It was so hard to do, so I should have stopped and thought why does this feel wrong? Never again. I'm so sorry Sheryl and especially Danielle.

30

My relationship has come to an end because of JW brainwashing

by MM090503 in

a few of you may remember when i came to this site back in sept. i was seeking advice about my bf who had been studying with jw.

well i hate to say it but they won.

after being together almost 2yrs we broke up.

Thegoodgirl

Sorry to hear it, Meg. Hey, how were you to know? The same thing happens with everyone. My mom got into the cult, and My dad asked her dad, what should we do? And my Grandpa said "just let her try it out, she'll get tired of it after a while." 25 years later...

Not your fault. Sorry he doesn't see it now, maybe someday he'll be sorry he lost your relationship.

24

I had an odd day today......

by love11 in

i finished my spring semester of schooling!

yay!

i got a call from my sister saying that she was arrested and in jail for 3 days for domestic violence.

Thegoodgirl

Love11,

That part about "then she looked a little sad" brought tears to my eyes. Sounds just like my mom, and I feel like I'm reading about my future when I read your post. My mom is in her 50s. I don't have kids yet, but I can so see my mom doing something like that and then regretting it 10 years later. (And mom lives in Florida!) That's one of the main reasons we don't move back there, because who knows at any moment she decides to cut me off, and then I've just moved "closer to family" for nothing. Anyway, thanks for sharing.

GG

102

What's Your Favorite JW Expressions?

by minimus in

jw
friends

i like "theocratic strategy", "new light", "the slave", and "lovers of truth"......anything that you find amusing?

Thegoodgirl

We've left it in Jehovah's hands.

(Richie, nice picture, what a hottie!)

43

Did you ever feel like you never fit in?

by Dragonlady76 in

jw
friends

when i was growing up in dubland, i always felt like i never "fit" in with the other kids in the cong or their families.

i always knew deep down that i didn't like being a jw and their had to be more to life than meetings and field service.

i just wanted to be normal, like the other kids and have sleepovers, birthday parties, after school activities and christmas etc..... my folks were and still are devout dubs and my dad in particular is the nicest man you will ever meet, he would give you the shirt off his back if you needed it, no questions asked.

Thegoodgirl

Candid: Good point. I wouldn't want to be friends with them now. I too was the one "in between". Worldly people were too bad, and the kids in the congregation were just sneaking around behind their parents backs, so that left the old pioneers to befriend. Not bad, but no good for a teenager trying to find a peer group to identify with. I finally started making friends right before leaving when I finally decided to branch out to other congregations and found some sane 19 year olds, but now they won't talk to me cause I"m not going to meetings. The Witnesses who snuck out? Well, 2 are on drugs ( I mean hard drugs-one had a crack baby who she left with her parents to care for), a 2 are married, but have no money for jobs since they have no education, so have extra stress, plenty married and then divorcedbefore 20 years old, and the occasional still in the truth acting like perfect backstabbing witness elderettes. It's kind of sad.

My mom was never included in stuff because she was divorced and also was too "good." There would always be anniversary parties and stuff that we weren't invited to even though everyone else our age and my mom's age was at. When I was like 17, I finally got an invitation to my friend's parents 20th anniversary, and don't you know, my own mother wasn't invited. I was shocked. Everyone in the congregation was there. She was the pioneer that was really trying, Yet she was always left out of stuff in the congregation. It's disgusting.

61

Describe Your Personality

by minimus in

jw
friends

what type of person are you?

are you outgoing, charming, sweet, thoughtful, humorous?

all right.

Thegoodgirl

Quiet and "sweet" on the outside, deep thinker on the inside. A pushover. Curious, but lazy. Want everyone else to be happy, but I rarely am. Though if it will make others happy, then I'll pretend to be happy. Cry at sad stuff on TV, but too much of a pushover/people-pleaser to get out and do something about the injustices in the world.

Am hoping I will build my strength with time and die truly as happy as I am on the outside.

138

The verdict is in! Michael Jackson is . . . . . . . . NOT GUILTY!

by nicolaou in

the full list of charges faced by michael jackson at his child abuse trial.

count 1: conspiracy to commit child abduction, false imprisonment and extortion between 1 february and 31 march 2003. not guilty.

count 2: lewd act upon a child between 20 february and 12 march 2003. not guilty.

Thegoodgirl

I kind of think he was innocent too. He's a weirdo, and odd and probably has some mental disorders. No I wouldn't let my kids sleep near him, but you have to look at the fact that this family tried to sue anyone they can. As a nurse, I run across like every 10th or 15th patient is just determined to find something to sue us over. And more often than not, it's the old patient's grown son or daughter adoment in finding something to sue over. It's disgusting and annoying. They sit there with a pen and notepad and just write down everything we do and ask for a copy of the chart, etc. It's absolutely ridiculous, but that's reality, and there are just plenty of people out there like that.

That said....I think this mother of the child was one of those people, end of story.