problem: .
want a normal life of going to college, freedom.
in return will get kicked out of the house.
Hi Tsu -
17 is just plain tough but you can get thru this. Billions before you have already succeeded!!
Ill have to pay my bills which come out to be $440 per month
I'm curious what sort of expenses you would have that would total $440 per month...
College will cost about $20,000.
I assume that is for a year and includes living expenses like room and food?
-Aude.
i've got all these bethel pics to share with you and i hope i can the good ones posted.
i will only be posting ones of bethel... cause if you want to see nyc there are other places to do that.. .
here is the entrance to walkill... another good use of those voluntary donations.. here's the boys doing some work on... bindery equipment i think (at this point i was still half asleep).
Hi Richie -
Fun pics. Thanks for taking the time to share them with us!!
-Aude.
(unlisted phone...!)
i had to stop crying so i could write this and if you saw me you wouldn't think i would be the type to cry!
i am a 35 year old man from western australia....i should be tough....or so they say.
i have never posted anything before so excuse my fractured writing.
Hi Neil -
We're happy you stumbled upon us. I've been out of the 'truth' since 1994 or so but was more of a 'walk-away believer'. Not DA'd or DF'd. Such strong feelings of guilt and dis-ease in so many different situations.
This place has been such an incredible experience for me. Just reading the posts can be so curative.
I feel like I've met people who really, really understand what I feel. Some have put words to feelings that I just could not identify.
Get a comfy chair, a fresh box of tissues, and prepare to find some wonderful people with amazing stories to tell.
Oh yes - Many times we just get plain silly, too!!
-Aude Sapere (meaning: Dare to Know; Dare to Have Knowledge/Wisdom)
help, i'm finnaly going to do it.. i've been putting it off for 8 years.
i'm finnaly biting the bullet and getting it done.. at 10am tomorrow morning i'm getting my wisdom teeth taken out.. .
hheeellllppp.. i don't wanna go..
Hi Lehaa -
Glad to hear your surgery went nicely.
I hope you have lots of ice cream on hand. It helps to control the swelling and acts as a bit of topical anesthetic, too, because it's icy cold.
Feel better!
-Aude.
Baptized 1974 @ age 14
Pioneered 1984 - 1986
Irreg publisher 1986 - 1992 (ish)
Pretty inactive since 1992.
today i am 17. i just feel excited but i can't run up to witnesses and tell them... so instead i'll just quietly celebrate with all my friends on the board.
thanks guys-- you make life easier.
Happy Birthday, Richie!!
-Aude.
reading back there are lots of people sending pm ??
and getting in touch and meeting up and doing things together and - going to see our mouthy.. how do i get to get in touch with yawl say if i'm abroad.
(don't crack that one).. people on the board seem to be gradually getting to know each other in the real world too, and i think this is so great.
Hi Hammy -
It might also help if you reference your location under your avatar. It can be a conversation-starter.
Maybe. ...
I'm hoping to meet up with some from here too. I haven't had opportunity to do that yet but will definitely make time next time something is within 8hours of driving time!
-Aude.
from reading this site i've learned that jws frown up buying used clothing etc.
from second hand stores because of possible 'demonization.
' my neighbors are jw and i notice that they have fairly frequent garage sales.
Only bizarre JWs in my area ...How can you differentiate?-Aude.
There are some JWs that fly under the radar and have enough sense not to take everything sooo seriously. Then there are others who are just plain wacko. Like the sister whose son was having a nose bleed out in service and he said "oh the blood is running down the back of my throat" the mother said "well don't swallow it. You know how Jehovah feels about blood".
You mean that's not a 'normal' JW response?? It's what my mom always told me. Couldn't tip our heads back. Had to tip forward so we would bleed properly - out.
Which is why I sometimes have a tough time differentiating the usual JW from the Bizarro one...!!!
btw - I *do* know what y'all meant. I've seen some that were way more bizarre than dear old mom. But not many....
-Aude.
New Light.
Anything with smoke would have 'false religious connotation'.
-Aude.
i know so many people, not just witnesses that are on zoloft or similar drugs.
i know of some that, once they left the "truth", stopped taking these meds and have not had to go back on them.
i know of some that, if they did not have them, would not be able to properly function......what about you?
Yup. Sure was.
Started after my meltdown and was first prescribed Zoloft. They didn't tell me that you can sink deeper than hell and become even more depressed during the first week or two on the drug. I thought I was going to be locked up for insanity.
Once I started to rise out of Zoloft hell, I didn't like the 'flat-lining' that I experienced so I would stop after a several weeks. My heart would feel lighter and I felt happier when I was off. Then I would plummet and crash. It was horrible. I did that for about 4 years.
I had suicide-ideations for a few years before and then during my sporadic/semi-compliant-Zoloft-use years.
During the course of my two-year-cancer-treatment (all new doctors), anti-depressents were suggested. I discussed with doctor and since I wasn't liking Zoloft he suggested trying Prozac. It worked nicely and allowed me to have normal fluxuations in mood without going too high or too low. Although I was still semi-compliant, I stayed with the Prozac MUCH more consistently than Zoloft.
Dr suggested: Why not just stay with Prozac for a few months to get an idea of what 'normal' is or what 'normal' could be? What a concept!! I really didn't know normal from hellacious. He was right. Prozac was a good fit for me. I wasn't extremely compliant but fairly so. Even more compliant, though, when I was able to get the generic form (fluoxetine) at a third of the price!
On again, off again therapy (depending on my circumstances, emotions and finances) helped immensely.
Back in November, I spent about 72 hours straight (only about 6 or 7 hours sleep combined) scouting the various ex-JW sites and once I found JWD, MAGIC - !!!
(THANK YOU, Simon, Angharad, Seven006, & Everyone!!)
The clouds parted. The birds sang. I believe that even the Angels played directly to me...!! (could have been halleucination because I'm really tending toward agnosticism -- but I'm pretty sure I heard Angels singing that week... LOL ...!!!)
I still have 6 months supply of Prozac on hand but haven't felt a need for it since I've been on this site (coupled with monthly therapy sessions).
The truth will indeed set you free.
-Aude.
PS: I was so afraid of the stigma that I imagined was attached to using anti-depressants. Once I started taking them, I was surprised to learn how MANY people are on them. It was really no big deal and I'm glad got the help I so desparately needed.
edited to add: Although Zoloft wasn't a good fit for me, I know it has helped MANY, MANY people. My experience with the drug will not necessarily be your experience with it. There are so many options that it's always best to find a doctor that you can talk to and be willing to try a few until you get the 'right' response. At the time, I didn't realize that I had options and the affects could be so different. -Aude.
