The first time I was barely 14. My father had been df for a year but we still went to the hall. My mother had left him and had DA'd herself. This was all a shock b/c ever since i could remember our family had been considered a stronghold in our congregation. My uncle was a minesteral servant and his family was very active at our hall. It began slowly, I would arrive at the hall by myself and the people I had grown up with and their parents would all greet me warmly, ask how I was doing but after that nothing. No invites to be partners in field service, no ivites to sleep overs or gatherings. My own uncle would offer to drop me off and then head out to meet other families at BBQ's and picnics. My best friend of 9 years was no longer allowed to call or spend time with me. Her family feared that I would be a bad influence b/c of my parents choices. Mind you, I continued coming to the hall b/c it was all I knew (i was raised in the "truth"). People started to buy me clothes and bring leftovers to me at the meetings. They treated me as an orphan, giving me handouts, but had ceased offerinig me friendship. I brought this to my uncles attention telling him that I had parents who were taking care of me and therefore was not an orphan. After that people just smiled and went on about their business. My cousin or aunt were the only people who would be my partners in field service and I would only be called on to answeer a meetings if I was the only hand up.. Eventually I just stopped going. 2 years later my father had been reinstated and my youngest brother was now a part of the ministry school. He was five about to give his first talk so I came to the hall to give him support. Mind you I came just before his part and intended to leave immediatly after. As the began inroducing him, my uncle informed me that my precense was requested downstairs in one of the meeting rooms. Apparantly the elders decided it was appropiate to hold an impromptu meeting regarding my inactive status in the ministry school. They began questioning me about an abortion my mother forced me to have a few months prior. How this was any of their business or how they even found out was beyond me, nonetheless, i was questioned for thirty minutes on whether or not I had the abortion. No one offered consolation or asked if I needed guidance. I remember becoming snot nosed because i was crying so hard. 16 with three grown men in a room with the door shut. When I asked for a tissue, they looked puzzled as if I had just requested their first born. Needless to say, i never went back. Now I'm 22, married and in school. My uncles makes it very clear that i am not welcome in his house. The last time my father begged me to stop in and say hello, i overheared my uncle instructing my ten year old cousin to stay with me and make sure I did not take anything. My father is remarried to a woman who asks that I not stay over their house when visiting town. She belives I will bring demons into their home. My father conceeds for the most part unless i absolutley have no other option. My aunt on my mother's side of the family refuses to speak to me b/c my mother is DA'd.But her daughter is also. My mother was remarried last year and my aunt said b/c of her concious, she could not come, but had no problem sitting in our front room for two hours the following day to visit with her non-JW brother and sister who flew in from Cali to come to the wedding. I do not understand any religion, any person insisting on family values but shuns their own family members for their personal choices. I was never baptized and therefore never DF or DA'd. I was 14 years old, a baby when the congregation turned their back on me for my parents decisions.
EyeKinCeeClearly
JoinedPosts by EyeKinCeeClearly
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46
What is your most ridiculous example of being shunned?
by formerout ini was just having lunch in a wendy's near my house an hour ago.
an elder and his wife entered and got in line to order without seeing me seated in the eating area.
after a minute the wife turned and saw me.