last year my daughter had her first birthday and all my wife's family and friends were there.
my family didn't attend.
my mother and sister still believe in the jw teachings even though they are both considered inactive.
My kids didn't follow their mother. Thank God!
A lot of unbelieving husbands have to work their butts off to make sure their kids have as close to a regular childhood as possible all while arguing with their wife about religious doctrines.
Adjusted knowledge, I give you a lot of credit for looking out for your kids. I know the giantic effort it takes to not only have to do everything related to unapproved celebrations but also to deal with a spouse at the same time.
yep, he told her that he wants to go a friends b-day...keep in mind it's not until december.
well anyway i told her i didn't mind if he did and i would take him.
yep, enter cult mode.....i hate this freaking cult.
I really wish you the best of luck. I am so glad you are taking a stand and allowing your son to experience a birthday party. Hopefully he will go to many more and even have his own.
I did the same with my kids. You will be responsible for all planning, gift buying and wrapping and transportation. It's worth it! The bond you have with your son will grow stronger as you do these unapproved things and mom isn't around. my wife and I argued the first couple birthday parties but eventually she softened and although for the most part she has nothing to do with it she has given our kids a ride or two when I was sick. I even think there was time when she had to pick up the gift at the store for us for a bday party.
hi... i am new and after nearly 20 years after being disassociated at 15 i would like to make contact with others who have similar difficulties.
my mother was disfellowshipped shortly after my rebellion and had all ties with both her mother and brother cut and that remains the case.. just really hacked off with not being able to put things in the proper place in my life after all these years.
for the record i don't know if i believe in god but am searching for some peace as i seem to self destruct on a regular basis.. any ideas anyone?.
Welcome Kurteous! Glad you joined and posted. This can be a great place to get support, advice and sometimes feedback we need but don't always want. I hope you have a good relationship with your mom, you said she was df'd but not if you two are close.
You asked for ideas. I say start by sorting out your feelings by reading threads about what is going on in some other's lives which may help give you some perspective and maybe even get a counselor (in the real world) to help with the self destruction you mentioned.
glad you posted and can't wait to hear more about your life and why you left at such a young age. God for you not wasting your entire life in the borg.
i have a confession to make.
a strange urge is building in my brain... each time i see a jw literature cart on the street it builds.
it is becoming a stronger and stronger thought in my mind.
my family are no longer in the shadow of the watchtower.
(2nd generation born in, but only a small family)for that i have to offer my thanks to simon and everyone on this forum whose posts helped expose me to ttatt (i struggle to say quite how much it actually means to me, so i won't say more than, thank you).it all took a year or two, but i've read enough to know that i'm incredibly lucky and that it all happened for me in a very short time.although time turns to syrup when you have to wait.
"expectation postponed..." will the platitudinous catchphrase scriptures ever stop coming to mind?when i started to tell my family some of the things i'd been learning online, they looked at me with no little fear and trepidation.
its been a little over 2 years since i left the watchtower.
in that time the magazines have been cut, the birth of jwtv, jw-org.
carts for preaching, removed district overseers, cut assemblies, demand all the money from the congregations, stop construction and layoff bethelites, change the format of the tmschool .
I really can't see them getting rid of the preaching work. I agree Old Major that it's busy work for the publishers and the WTS needs them to be busy. Publishers that sit around and do nothing can get apathetic. Busy publishers are excited about the big A.
I see the WT/AW being consolidated and the WT study articles being added to the new CLAM meeting KM thingy. I also see them requesting the publishers to print their own monthly CLAM meeting thingy. But, I see some books and the consolidated magazine still being printed so they can control the quality - such as it is.
More video parts and 2 day regional conventions.
something struck me last week.
i have been dealing with what i can only describe as a fear of death.
i'm not old and not in bad health.
My wife and I are in the situation now where our parents are older and not super healthy. I realize they will one day pass away and I will miss them but I do what I can now to see and speak with them regularly; even my in-laws. My wife shows no fear that they will die because the big A is coming and they will all live through it. She is completely unprepared for the death of her parents. When it happens, and it eventually will, I don't know if it will drag her deeper into the cult or maybe wake her up. The same goes for when she finally comes face to face with her own mortality as we age and get closer to a natural ending.
I really try to enjoy my life now and show my appreciation for those around me.
the operation "change midweek meeting" probably was a move to divert attention of the brotherhood from layoffs to betel and the ranks of special pioneers, a smokescreen for the pedophilia scandal !
!operation "change meeting infrra-weekly" is a smokescreen.
what do you think ?.
I totally agree that everytime the WTS makes a change the rank and file think the end is coming immediately. I've seen myself that the a lot of the rank and file have stepped up their activity level in the last couple months. We'll see how long this lasts before they tire out and it all becomes mundane again.
I remember something similar when the separate bookstudy night meeting was cancelled. Everyone in my area thought that big A was going to happen immediately - or at least the nearest October :)
Dubs love October
because i haven't put in a single dime for over a year now in the box at the kh.
the usual custom is to put money in there right after the meetings.
but heck, i already spend so much in car fuel just to attend - i don't care really if the gb starves and dies.. oops.. anyway, do the elders take note who's donating and who's not?.
long time lurker here.
i'm a fifth gen born-in baptized jw.
to say i've been struggling with doubts is an understatement.
Welcome Heartsafire! I am married to a witness wife and successfully faded. We were able to maintain our marriage. My wife didn't turn me into the elders when I was fading. I try to plant seeds but she sees through that so pretty much after my initial OMG DID YOU SEE THIS HONEY! moments when researching and learning we have an unspoken truce. Our marriage isn't perfect but it works for us, most of the time. My kids are free - so far.
Keep reading, posting and developing relationships on here because there will be days when you need a more personal friend to rant to. Good luck.
