Posts by BoozeRunner

You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and cokes coming.
--Alan, age 10

No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with.
--Kirsten, age 10

9. WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?

Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.
--Camille, age 10

No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get married.[/]
--Freddie, age 6

8. HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?

You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids. --Derrick, age 8

7. WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?

Both don't want any more kids.
--Lori, age 8

6. WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?

Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough.
--Lynnette, age 8

On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.
--Martin, age 10

5. WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?

I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns.
--Craig, age 9

4. WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?

When they're rich.
--Pam, age 7

The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that.
--Curt, age 7

The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do.
--Howard, age 8

3. IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?

I don't know which is better, but I'll tell you one thing. I'm never going to have sex with my wife. I don't want to be all grossed out.
--Theodore, age 8

It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.
--Anita, age 9

2. HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?

There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?
--Kelvin, age 8

"And the #1 Favorite is........"

1.HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?

[i]Tell your wife that she looks pretty even if she looks like a truck.

--Ricky, age 10

15

My Profound and Wise 1000th post...

by Billygoat in

a few minutes before the services started, the townspeople were sitting in their pews talking.

suddenly, satan appeared at the front of the room.

everyone started screaming and running for the entrance, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from evil incarnate.. soon everyone had exited the church except for one elderly gentleman who sat calmly in his pew without moving, seeming oblivious to the fact that god's ultimate enemy was in his presence.. satan walked up to the old man and said, "don't you know who i am?".

BoozeRunner

Billygoat, congrats on your newly acquired JEDI status. I am sure I can outfit you with some additional garb befitting your divinity. :-P

ALL HAIL THE GODDESS BILLYGOAT!!!!

{{{{HUGS}}}}
Boozy

29

Need some Input!!!!

by VeniceIT in

jw
friends

ok people!!!!

you might have noticed i haven't been around as much the last few weeks.

i started a new full time job in the cosmetic industry.

BoozeRunner

Hi Ven...I too like the Rachelle de Veni.

BTW, how do we get the Ex-JW Discount? Show the bullwhip scars on our backs? LOL

Boozy

10

xmas funnies (WARNING could be offensive)

by peaceloveharmony in

okay, i warned y'all, don't get mad .

.

happyholidays

BoozeRunner

Way too funny all!!!HaHaHa

This one comes around each tear, but I always get a kick out of it.

Enjoy:-)
Boozy

Dear Santa:
You must be surprised that I'm writing you today, the 26th of December Well, I would very much like to clear up certain things that have occurred Since the beginning of the month (while filled with illusion I wrote you this letter)
I asked for a bicycle, an electric train set, a pair of roller blades, and a football uniform.
I destroyed my brain studying the whole year. Not only was I the first in my class, but I had the best grades in the whole school.
I'm not going to lie to you Santa, there was no one in my entire neighborhood that behaved better than me.
When my parents, my brothers, and my friends and I would go on errands, I would even help the elderly cross the street. There was virtually nothing I wouldn't do for humanity.
WHAT BALLS YOU HAVE LEAVING ME A FUCKING YO-YO, STUPID ASS WHISTLE, AND A PAIR OF SOCKS!
WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING, YOU FAT SON OF A BITCH! YOU'VE TAKE ME FOR A SUCKER THE WHOLE FUCKING YEAR; TO COME OUT WITH SOME SHIT LIKE THIS UNDER THE DAM TREE.
AS IF YOU HADN'T TRICKED ME ENOUGH, YOU GAVE THAT LITTLE SHIT HEAD ACROSS THE STREET SO MANY DAMN TOYS THAT HE CAN'T EVEN WALK INTO HIS DAMN HOUSE! PLEASE DON'T LET ME SEE YOU TRYING TO FIT YOUR BIT FAT ASS DOWN MY CHIMNEY NEXT YEAR OR I'LL FUCK YOU UP!
I'LL THROW ROCKS AT THOSE STUPID ASS REINDEERS OF YOURS AND SCARE THEIR ASSES AWAY SO YOU WILL HAVE TO WALK YOUR BIG FAT ASS BACK TO THE NORTH POLE JUST LIKE I HAVE TO, SINCE YOU DIDN'T GET ME THAT FUCKING BIKE, YOU PUNK BITCH! YOU KNOW WHAT SANTA, FUCK YOU! NEXT YEAR YOU'LL FIND OUT HOW BAD I CAN REALLY FUCKING BE.
YOU'VE BEEN SLEEPING ON A MOTHERFUCKER FAR TOO LONG SO WATCH YOU BACK NEXT YEAR, YOU FAT BITCH!

SINCERELY,
LITTLE JOHNNY

4

another funny pic...but could be offensive to some

by peaceloveharmony in

how office rumors get started.

.. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .

BoozeRunner

Oh Mony, Mony, Mony!!! I only WISH a rumor like that would get around my job about me...LOL

Boozy

24

Are you stable? (Mentally, that is)

by ashitaka in

jw
friends

ok.....any response will do, but if you're going to post a funny one, please also type your real thoughts along with it.. as for me, i'm pretty wild, but stable.

i never mention or show my fears; especially if my wife is around.

i can't bear to make her nervous.. ashi

BoozeRunner

Truthfully, I believe I am stable, but far from "normal" whatever that is. To put it another way, my abnormalities are in a stable state, that is, not getting any worse. Just a result of BORG life, as well as other things which should not befall a decent human being. I pretty much just see and live life from a slightly skewed perspective.

Boozy

25

Whos Who

by Stacey in

jw
friends

can someone post the link to the whos who page?

.

thanks.

BoozeRunner

Marie, e-mail Stephanus with your bio, and he will post it on Who's Who.

Boozy

15

Question for you all

by wonderwoman77 in

jw
friends

i was wondering if anyone has ever felt like they were in a relationship where the person is an empty bottle with holes in the bottom, and you are constantly trying to fill them up?

i was listening to the song not the doctor by alanis and it triggered this in my brain.

i would love to know everyones thoughts and experiences on this..... steph

BoozeRunner

WW, TY 4 the encouragement. :-)

COMF, you are right...so, its over between us. BYE...LOLOLOLOL

Boozy

15

Question for you all

by wonderwoman77 in

jw
friends

i was wondering if anyone has ever felt like they were in a relationship where the person is an empty bottle with holes in the bottom, and you are constantly trying to fill them up?

i was listening to the song not the doctor by alanis and it triggered this in my brain.

i would love to know everyones thoughts and experiences on this..... steph

BoozeRunner

Hi WW,

Such relationships seem to be my destiny. I have always likened it to constantly filling a pitcher up wih cold water on a hot summers day, only to find that when I need a drink for relief, the pitcher is always empty.

It sucks to be able to give SO MUCH, asK so LITTLE, and get NOTHING.

Boozy