Posts by Check_Your

only if to just say hello.. my life has been anything but boring, pioneered for years, brought several family members into "the truth", and find myself unable to have studies anylonger because i feel unsure about the stand i have taken all these years.. i was previously married, my husband left the organization for various reason, we divorced and i recently remarried another brother, he is a wonderful man and husband, i care for him deeply we and had been friends for 15 years.

i also have a son from my first marriage who is 4, he is the love of my life, recently my son had an opertion that could require a blook transfusion and to be honest i could never deny him that.

Check_Your_Premises

Hi unclear.

Welcome.

I liked your post. I think it probably helped you to write it. I find it is often helpful to write out my thoughts. It helps me to clarify my thinking. I hope you continue to post, and continue to hash out the thoughts in your head.

Thanks so much.

CYP

30

Please help, don't want to lose daughter

by katy in

please help,need some advice.

my daughter married a jw last april without telling us.

i suspect she thought we wouldn't approve.

Check_Your_Premises

I think this situation sounds pretty harmless and they will get along and be happy.

Until the daughter or baby needs a blood transfusion...

Sorry mom. Don't mean to scare you here. But I also don't want you to be lulled into complacency about this religion. It could be low in terms of cost for you. For many others it has been a far greater cost than any should have to bear.

CYP

30

Please help, don't want to lose daughter

by katy in

please help,need some advice.

my daughter married a jw last april without telling us.

i suspect she thought we wouldn't approve.

Check_Your_Premises

I Agree, but as I am sure you agree, it is the daughters choice who she lets influence her decisions. It is the mothers job to respect that and not be intrusive. I think you agree with the rule in the above. Same if the roles were reversed, if it was the JW mother in law that was imposing her values on her daughter-in-law- the advice would be the same.

Oh so clever. All influence is equally legitimate. This ladies and gentlemen is a beautiful piece of sophistry. Marvel at it's close resemblance to an ethical and logical position.

But also note the difference. This woman is motivated to INFLUENCE her daughter such that the DAUGHTER has more control over HER own life.

The jw are motivated to INFLUENCE her so that the JW have more control over HER life.

See the difference?

Now let's notice the difference in methods.

The mother will appeal to her daughter using carefully thought out questions designed to get her to be open to ALL facts and ideas.

The JW will appeal to the daughter by asking her to ONLY look at facts and ideas that support the JW paradigm.

The mother will encourage the daughter to talk to other people with different points of view. IN that way she will be able to make the best informed and thought out choices.

The Jw will encourage her to be surrounded ONLY by other JW's so that no other ideas or fact may ever come to light.

See the difference?

Of course not. To notice the difference would likley threaten your fragile world view.

CYP

30

Please help, don't want to lose daughter

by katy in

please help,need some advice.

my daughter married a jw last april without telling us.

i suspect she thought we wouldn't approve.

Check_Your_Premises

Does she want a divorce for her daughter so she can hang storks?

It has nothing to do with such trivial concerns... the matter has to do with WHO SHOULD GET TO DECIDE whether she can hang storks.

Who her daughter allows to be in control of her life is a matter of the utmost importance. Because nobody but her daughter could possibly know, better than she, what is in her own best interests.

God gave us all a conscience for a reason. And that reason is not to discard it for the conscience of another person who is just as capable of self-delusion as anybody else.

30

Please help, don't want to lose daughter

by katy in

please help,need some advice.

my daughter married a jw last april without telling us.

i suspect she thought we wouldn't approve.

Check_Your_Premises

Learn about cults!!!

Your daughter and her husband are under the influence of mind control. That is just a real fancy way of saying that they are in an environment where everybody thinks the same way, and uses the same stupid arguments to control them.

So what you need to do first is to learn about mind control cults. Here are a few links: http://www.freeminds.org/psych/lifton.htm http://www.rickross.org/mind_control.html

I would recommend the following books:

Releasing the Bonds by Steven Hassan

Combatting Cult Mind Control by Steven Hassan

If you don't like to read you could order these videos:

http://www.rickross.org/dvds/dvd.html

Hope this helps! Take care mom. To answer your question, there is always hope! Many here have left, or have helped others leave. I'll be prayin for you!

CYP

5

Please help,don't want to lose my daughter

by katy in

Check_Your_Premises

We are ready, willing, and able to do anything to help you.

8

Other than spiritual conversations you've heard at the Kingdom Hall.

by JH in

jw
friends

.

i remember once talking to a brother at the kingdom hall, who was a car mechanic, and i asked him a little question about my car, and he replied, we don't talk about this at the kingdom hall, meaning we should only talk about spiritual things.... .

gee, i couldn't believe what he told me, when just about everyone at the hall talks about anything butt religious stuff..

Check_Your_Premises

I asked him a little question about my car, and he replied

This is probably just his way of keeping from being inundated with car questions and mooching brothers wanting free repairs.

CYP

25

"Joined-As-Adult" JW's: What need did the WT fulfill for you?

by Check_Your_Premises in

jw
friends

.

were you able to fulfill or remove that need in some way?

did fulfilling that need make it possible or easier for you to exit the wt?

Check_Your_Premises

In the beginning it seemed so, but as time went on, the fact that they weren't fulfilling that need, and their lies, failed preditions, lack of love, ect. time to leave...

So you were able to fulfill those needs outside the org?

25

"Joined-As-Adult" JW's: What need did the WT fulfill for you?

by Check_Your_Premises in

jw
friends

.

were you able to fulfill or remove that need in some way?

did fulfilling that need make it possible or easier for you to exit the wt?

Check_Your_Premises

Yes. I accepted that no one or thing has control over life. I must look to myself for strength.

What went into you having this realization? What external forces allowed or influenced it?

Check_Your_Premises

Posts by Check_Your_Premises