Check_Your_Premises

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Posts by Check_Your_Premises

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  25

  Any commonality with dubs who join as adults?

  by Check_Your_Premises in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i know many women who joined as adults who were victims of physical abuse or some sort of sexual assault.

  i know many men who join because their wives do.. i think generally to join the dubs as an adult, you have to be looking for some sort of security.

  the world probably hasn't been very nice to you.

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  Check_Your_Premises

  Yeah I got one couple I can't get a mark on. They are totally loaded and absolutely fabulous... smart, beautiful, funny.

  I found out after awhile that the wife actually had a trashy, chaotic childhood, and I think she was the victim of a sex crime. Him... I just can't figure it out in his case. It is actually a little mystery I have been trying to solve for awhile, but it is difficult to get info out without arousing suspicioun at times.

  As a non-dub I feel at times like Jane Goodall observing chimpanzees, I have even had exceremnt thrown at me!!! I have found the best times for me are at those social functions away from the hall. I can be very disarming, and I think in general dubs have no concept of personal space. They tell me things about eachother that I would never tell anyone!!!

  I keep finding that despite outward appearances that most have very crazy stories to tell!

  CYP
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  25

  Any commonality with dubs who join as adults?

  by Check_Your_Premises in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i know many women who joined as adults who were victims of physical abuse or some sort of sexual assault.

  i know many men who join because their wives do.. i think generally to join the dubs as an adult, you have to be looking for some sort of security.

  the world probably hasn't been very nice to you.

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  Check_Your_Premises

  Has anyone with a healthy upbringing ever joined as an adult?

  That would be my husband and yes i think you got it right ,at least in my husbands case . All the answers in life were tied into a neat little package,thinking , learning ,how to live and knowing how you think you will never die . I suppose it is so much easier to live your life controled then to control your own life and you never have to worry about destiny because that is all planned out for you by the wt.

  Ok K, I am not sure those aren't contradictory ideas. To want to have the world tied up in a neat bow for you does not seem to me like a person who has a very well defined sense of self. Or maybe they were never allowed. What were his folks like?

  I just think they all must be seeking shelter from something.

  CYP
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  25

  Any commonality with dubs who join as adults?

  by Check_Your_Premises in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i know many women who joined as adults who were victims of physical abuse or some sort of sexual assault.

  i know many men who join because their wives do.. i think generally to join the dubs as an adult, you have to be looking for some sort of security.

  the world probably hasn't been very nice to you.

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  Check_Your_Premises

  I know many women who joined as adults who were victims of physical abuse or some sort of sexual assault. I know many men who join because their wives do.

  I think generally to join the dubs as an adult, you have to be looking for some sort of security. The world probably hasn't been very nice to you. You crave a certainty that you are protected by God, and worshipping Him the right way, that you are in with the "inside scoop". You don't have to trust your own conscience anymore because so much of that work is done for you. You don't have to figure out complex theological issues, because those are explained to you. The entire universe is tied up in a nice neat bow, and all of your activities are planned for you. You are given order, ritual, and a sense of purpose.

  Any other things that make it appealing?

  What sort of experiences do people have that make them more likely to join as an adult?

  Molested as a child? Abused physically as a child? A chaotic home life? Has anyone with a healthy upbringing ever joined as an adult?
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  11

  Is good fortune on my side? Wife wants to move.

  by ithinkisee in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  those of you that know i am about to tell my wife what i have learned about jws religion soon.

  we're talking likely less than a week.. anyways, i have in the past couple months dropped hints about moving somewhere else.

  our house has literally tripled in value since we purchased 5 years ago, and we bought some property last year that has gone up 600%.

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  Check_Your_Premises

  Hey I think.

  Have you been laying the groundwork with her to make her more receptive to criticism of the org? Have you asked her questions that will encourage independant thinking? Have you dealt with the problem of phobias?

  Hope I am not sounding critical. I think you are a smart guy, and you know I admire your work.

  It is just very common to want to go for a knockout blow. This "talk" you want to have with her sounds a lot like that. The big problem with a knockout is if it doesn't work, you will lose her trust, and you will be very dissappointed. If you are anything like me, that dissappointment will turn into aggravation, and finally rage. That rage will only add to the loss of trust you have caused, by making you seem "demonic".

  Moving sounds great!!! I think it is a great idea and will help your fade.

  Just don't shoot your wad buddy!
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  126

  My wifes struggle

  by gringojj in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hi friends.

  well its seems my wife has hit a standstill with the dubs.

  some of you may know my situation, but i guess its all relative anyway.

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  Check_Your_Premises

  Has AFIN come back yet?

  If she has, she isn't posting.

  I don't think AFIN is coming back. I think she has had it with this place. That is cool. I could understand that. I don't know if I would want to go slug it out with thousands of dubs on a posting board, not that they would have me. No matter how much you know, you don't know more than several people combined. I had a nice conversation with her today. She is alright when she isn't fighting with all of us. I hope she finds she doesn't need a group of people to make her be faithful to God. True faithfulness is shown when we don't have anybody telling/making us obey God. We just do it because we love Him!
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  27

  In defense of J-Dubs who post here, AKA JWD opposers!!!

  by Check_Your_Premises in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i just got an im from afin.

  apparantly she can't post right now.

  i don't know what she did exactly, so i can't speak to her specific offense, but in general i think the absolutely wrong thing to do is ban j-dubs who come here to debate.. .

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  Check_Your_Premises

  Phew. When I saw your id Mrs Jones, I got scared that I made a hasty generalization.

  (This is an inside joke between Mrs Jones and I)
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  27

  In defense of J-Dubs who post here, AKA JWD opposers!!!

  by Check_Your_Premises in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i just got an im from afin.

  apparantly she can't post right now.

  i don't know what she did exactly, so i can't speak to her specific offense, but in general i think the absolutely wrong thing to do is ban j-dubs who come here to debate.. .

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  Check_Your_Premises

  Maybe we should also look for people calling dubs all sort of things, when they post something.

  Sure! I am all for good manners. I usually pipe up with a "welcome" when some dub blusters in here and pisses everyone off.

  I want them here! I don't think they can take the heat. If I am wrong I want to know it.
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  27

  In defense of J-Dubs who post here, AKA JWD opposers!!!

  by Check_Your_Premises in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i just got an im from afin.

  apparantly she can't post right now.

  i don't know what she did exactly, so i can't speak to her specific offense, but in general i think the absolutely wrong thing to do is ban j-dubs who come here to debate.. .

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  Check_Your_Premises

  C_Y_P I have heard from good sources AFIN is visiting Tartarus for a short while, her release is pending.

  Great news. I look forward to crossing swords with her soon.

  CYP
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  27

  In defense of J-Dubs who post here, AKA JWD opposers!!!

  by Check_Your_Premises in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i just got an im from afin.

  apparantly she can't post right now.

  i don't know what she did exactly, so i can't speak to her specific offense, but in general i think the absolutely wrong thing to do is ban j-dubs who come here to debate.. .

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  Check_Your_Premises

  I only read AFIN's posts on Gringojj's thread about his wife...but I must say...I saw no name calling on her part.

  Well she did tell me something about not casting pearls before the swine... somehow I have a feeling I might be the swine in her illustrations. At any rate, I have had previous experience with her doing just that sort of thing.

  But regardless, you are absolutely right. We should never let other's bad behavior be an excuse for our own, for in doing so we allow people, we probably don't like, determine our behavior. Some of the responses to her are what actually helped motivate me to write this post. That and a post asking that we screen new members (apparantly tongue in cheek)

  And I still say AFIN has a lot of guts to come here!!! Say what else you want, you can't take that away from her!!!
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  27

  In defense of J-Dubs who post here, AKA JWD opposers!!!

  by Check_Your_Premises in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i just got an im from afin.

  apparantly she can't post right now.

  i don't know what she did exactly, so i can't speak to her specific offense, but in general i think the absolutely wrong thing to do is ban j-dubs who come here to debate.. .

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  Check_Your_Premises

  I have lost much to the cult, but compared to many it is a scraped knee.

  I understand K, that is why I said the above. I guess I don't mean to say that we should put up with anything.

  I just think it is more fun to get them here, out in the open where they can't use their little threats, and intimidation techniques to get people to stop saying things they don't like.