welcome to the board,
I know this has probably been discussed before, but I would like to take a poll of your thoughts as to what you personally would do, disassociate yourself or just fade over time. I've been in the process of "fading" myself since November of last year, (last meeting in January, and NEVER going back). I have been considering making it official though by formal letter of DA. I have a few JW family members, of which the only one's opinion that I would concern myself with being my sister. She knows my recent position, but perhaps just not how absolute it is. Let me know your thoughts. Thanks.
like i tell people i know who are in this very predicament:
it's your choice. there is no right or wrong way to do this. one thing is certain, (in the big picture if you will).... and that's that you (and your family members) will experience the same amount of pain regardless of the decision you make. it's like tearing the bandaid off, slowly, or quickly. but ultimately you end up at the same place. and that would be where you are no longer a witness, and everyone knows it. if you DA, everyone and yourself will be under a boatload of duress for a while. but it does go away. and if you fade, then everyone and yourself will be under little bits of duress at different times over the years. you dig?
anyways, i DA'd myself because i didn't want to spend the next X number of years essentially lying to the people i loved about how i viewed the universe. there's this thing called intellectual freedom that, unfortunately, i hold more dear more than the feelings of the people i love. and that's because it is MY mind, and MY life. and i could not fathom doing the fade thing, and then in the end them still be hurt and confused and in that freaking cult. and actually, it has worked out well for me. several of my good friends are out now. they say it may have taken them much longer if i hadn't dropped a bomb like that last year.
but that is just my opinion and experience.
best wishes to you, and happy trails,
TS