Thanks so much everyone that really felt great!
And i needed abit of cheering up today, I've still got ten minutes of being in my twentys it seems so strange!
Cordelia
JoinedPosts by Cordelia
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28
cordelias first ever birthday!
by Cordelia inhey i keep forgetting but its my birthday tomorrow!.
18th november i will be the big 30 (and i look about 11!).
i really wanted tobe completely open and celebrate it properly i never dreamt i'd be still in the position of living a double life and hiding my true feelings from my family (see my other thread).
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28
cordelias first ever birthday!
by Cordelia inhey i keep forgetting but its my birthday tomorrow!.
18th november i will be the big 30 (and i look about 11!).
i really wanted tobe completely open and celebrate it properly i never dreamt i'd be still in the position of living a double life and hiding my true feelings from my family (see my other thread).
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Cordelia
hey i keep forgetting but its my birthday tomorrow!
18th november i will be the big 30 (and i look about 11!)
i really wanted tobe completely open and celebrate it properly i never dreamt i'd be still in the position of living a double life and hiding my true feelings from my family (see my other thread)
I have just made a vow to myself that i will have it all sorted by christmass so i can be free to go out (i will have to get one of those baby trees i can stick in the cupboard!)
God all this is making me feel a tinsy bit guilty!
what was it like celebrating your first pagan things?
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63
ok i think i finally have made a decision
by Cordelia insoooooo any of you thats been following my threads thanks (and poor u) i have changed my mind so many times.
i have finally decided that i must stop trying to get reinstated, basically i got dfed 9 months ago had a boyfriend i felt i loved, was married tho still to my hubby who is only just starting to divorce me, (hes waited coz he keeps saying we could try again for the sake of our daughter but he would expect me to be completly in the 'truth') i hid the bf from my family coz they were so heartbroke and i decided to please them i would get reinstated and then fade, but as time went on i realised that wasnt an option as with a family like mine it would be so hard to do, plus there was the bf still hidden poor guy, anyway we spilt up several times, i was a complete physco i kept blaming him for everything,.
anyway last month i put my letter of reinstatement in and sat there scared stiff that they would reinstate me (as that would defo mean the end of the bf) they didnt reinstate me, and i blamed the bf and we spilt for good;.
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Cordelia
it really means alot that u all take the time out to care, your comments help me alot,
tik i did get your email the other day and there were so many things i want to respond to so i will email u when i have more time, (i keep just bobbing on the comp) it was lovely to hear from you,
sass u are right and i will put my daughter first i have just got a good solictor, but my hubby wants her half and half which is only fair, thats the sadest thing of all this, guess thats why when me and the bf had it hard i swayed towards the 'truth' again, and figured id just go back to everything id left behind, but i didnt count on loving the bf still so much! (he thinks its freaky how we cant seem to completely let go, whan it prob would be the best thing for both of us, but he feels that must mean its love and so he wants to move in and be together openly this time)
which is what i decided to do, coz i havent been happy living this double life, but that brings me to ,y family how do i tell them?
big willy thanks for your experience, i always thought it was better to fade and not be dfed coz than at least they can have association without feeling guilty to god, but i guess its just as hard either way! youre right my dad does love me but i know without a doubt that he would cut me off completely if i was seeing/living with this boy, and thats what hurts my family will see it as a choice between them and him, and there not well etc and i will break there hearts but i dont think getting reinstated then leaving would be much better do you?
plus id lose the bf, anyway im going round in circles i have made the decision to be with him and stop the meetings (i hate sitting there) but how do i go about telling them?
and am i making the right decision?
can you be happy without your family around?
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63
ok i think i finally have made a decision
by Cordelia insoooooo any of you thats been following my threads thanks (and poor u) i have changed my mind so many times.
i have finally decided that i must stop trying to get reinstated, basically i got dfed 9 months ago had a boyfriend i felt i loved, was married tho still to my hubby who is only just starting to divorce me, (hes waited coz he keeps saying we could try again for the sake of our daughter but he would expect me to be completly in the 'truth') i hid the bf from my family coz they were so heartbroke and i decided to please them i would get reinstated and then fade, but as time went on i realised that wasnt an option as with a family like mine it would be so hard to do, plus there was the bf still hidden poor guy, anyway we spilt up several times, i was a complete physco i kept blaming him for everything,.
anyway last month i put my letter of reinstatement in and sat there scared stiff that they would reinstate me (as that would defo mean the end of the bf) they didnt reinstate me, and i blamed the bf and we spilt for good;.
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Cordelia
u guys are great
Ross i know u know me and i know u are so right!
jgnat how are u so full of such brilliant ideas all the time, i will do that.
diana, im like u i could prob tell u what to do just cant seem to tell myself!
jeff thanks too, i do know what i need to do and this time i must do it, or im sure ill drive u all completely mad! not to mention the poor bf!!
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6
Creation account according to the Ladies....
by bull01lay inin the beginning god created eve.
and she had 3 breasts.
after three weeks in the garden, god came to visit eve.
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Cordelia
i thought it was really funny, does anyone remember thatb rib joke about adam
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11
Can you read this?
by skyman incan you read this?
olny srmat poelpe can.
i cdnuolt blveiee taht i cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht i was rdanieg.
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Cordelia
do you know what i read it so fast absolutely no probs at all and im alittle bit tipsy maybe that helps
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63
ok i think i finally have made a decision
by Cordelia insoooooo any of you thats been following my threads thanks (and poor u) i have changed my mind so many times.
i have finally decided that i must stop trying to get reinstated, basically i got dfed 9 months ago had a boyfriend i felt i loved, was married tho still to my hubby who is only just starting to divorce me, (hes waited coz he keeps saying we could try again for the sake of our daughter but he would expect me to be completly in the 'truth') i hid the bf from my family coz they were so heartbroke and i decided to please them i would get reinstated and then fade, but as time went on i realised that wasnt an option as with a family like mine it would be so hard to do, plus there was the bf still hidden poor guy, anyway we spilt up several times, i was a complete physco i kept blaming him for everything,.
anyway last month i put my letter of reinstatement in and sat there scared stiff that they would reinstate me (as that would defo mean the end of the bf) they didnt reinstate me, and i blamed the bf and we spilt for good;.
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Cordelia
that old man boy and donkey was brilliant, i saved it on my favourites
i know i dont know why im like this but my dad is the same thats what so hard i know hed do anything for me and i will hurt him so bad!#
but i think i must stand by what i think (prob is i keep changing my mind!)
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17
Elders' School this weekend
by atypical ini don't know if this is true all over the country, but here they are having the elders' school this coming weekend.
i was wondering if there is anybody here who will be going.
if so, i hope we will be getting the scoop afterwards...........
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Cordelia
it must be same in england coz my dads going hes taking part of it, its a shame coz hes a good lovely man and has changed since i was dfed he knows about 607 and un and maliwa and everything but still thinks jws have the answers
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63
ok i think i finally have made a decision
by Cordelia insoooooo any of you thats been following my threads thanks (and poor u) i have changed my mind so many times.
i have finally decided that i must stop trying to get reinstated, basically i got dfed 9 months ago had a boyfriend i felt i loved, was married tho still to my hubby who is only just starting to divorce me, (hes waited coz he keeps saying we could try again for the sake of our daughter but he would expect me to be completly in the 'truth') i hid the bf from my family coz they were so heartbroke and i decided to please them i would get reinstated and then fade, but as time went on i realised that wasnt an option as with a family like mine it would be so hard to do, plus there was the bf still hidden poor guy, anyway we spilt up several times, i was a complete physco i kept blaming him for everything,.
anyway last month i put my letter of reinstatement in and sat there scared stiff that they would reinstate me (as that would defo mean the end of the bf) they didnt reinstate me, and i blamed the bf and we spilt for good;.
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Cordelia
thanks so much jgnat u have always helped me so much i dont mean to seem like i havent listened but i made my decision to tell my dad and my bf started being horriable about the way i had treated him in the past and it all went pearshaped and i found myself promising my family i wouldnt see him again, i know i need to do it now its been too long surely to keep coming back to each other like this must mean theres something there!
vitty i know what you mean and carla is ubm unbelieving mates and is that what u are and is it hard? coz i guess us jws expect other people just to understand and i know thats not fair.
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63
ok i think i finally have made a decision
by Cordelia insoooooo any of you thats been following my threads thanks (and poor u) i have changed my mind so many times.
i have finally decided that i must stop trying to get reinstated, basically i got dfed 9 months ago had a boyfriend i felt i loved, was married tho still to my hubby who is only just starting to divorce me, (hes waited coz he keeps saying we could try again for the sake of our daughter but he would expect me to be completly in the 'truth') i hid the bf from my family coz they were so heartbroke and i decided to please them i would get reinstated and then fade, but as time went on i realised that wasnt an option as with a family like mine it would be so hard to do, plus there was the bf still hidden poor guy, anyway we spilt up several times, i was a complete physco i kept blaming him for everything,.
anyway last month i put my letter of reinstatement in and sat there scared stiff that they would reinstate me (as that would defo mean the end of the bf) they didnt reinstate me, and i blamed the bf and we spilt for good;.
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Cordelia
i understand what you are both saying. but do you understand my piont that if i say about my bf i will lose my family forever and its a big decision to make.
i did decide i would just go back and live my life thru my family but if my bf is willing to have me back then i feel like i should give him a chance.
isnt it a shame that giving him a chance would mean hurting my family (what a bad religon!)
thing is as well, the bf is sick of everything so wants to move in with me (so then id be living in sin) but i dont think hed settle for hiding again, so what do i dooooo?