Cordelia

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Posts by Cordelia

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  63

  why cant they see how cruel they are??

  by Cordelia in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  why just because i am dfed (march) can my family and all the friends ive ever known tell me i am dead to them?.

  why have i missed two important family weddings and been told i ruined them coz everyone was upset?.

  why if ihave tried to please them and tried once to get reinstated and now finally felt i have to be true to myself have i caused such pain all over again?.

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  Cordelia

  Thanks you guys its just when the bf does something that is abit uncaring i wonder whether i am doing the rightthing!

  im taking my daughter today to my mums and she said she wants to know once and for all am i definately seeing the lad coz if i am she said she will see my daughter through my hubby as she will have nothing to do with me!

  as the bf has been abit uncaring recently itll be hard for me to do it as part of me wantsthem not to know how serious it is with my bf so they feel they can have some contact, but i know its better to be honest either way i wont be saying what they want to hear as im not going to the meetings now!

  so wish me luck,

  i didnt mean to ask you all what i should do as i know you have listened to me and helped so much before (especailly you jgnat, yet again you have been brilliant and i do listen honest, its just so hard!) i just needed to be reassured again so thanks for that!

  es, did your parents not come to your wedding? are you dfed coz of it? i saw your pics they looked gorgous and you looked so happy,
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  73

  D'Fing and Love

  by I-CH-TH-U-S in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i once talked to a jw about disfellowshipping and was curious to how can this be showing a christly love when you all out turn your back on them.

  he gave me an answer about rightousness and unrightrousness having no fellowship (which is biblical) but it didnt make sense to me.

  didnt seem applicable in many ways.

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  Cordelia

  SORRY ANEWME,

  I DIDNT REALISE IT COULD BE SO DIFFERENT IN DIFFERENT HALLS, GUESS THE'RE NOT SPIRIT DIRECTED AFTER ALL!
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  63

  why cant they see how cruel they are??

  by Cordelia in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  why just because i am dfed (march) can my family and all the friends ive ever known tell me i am dead to them?.

  why have i missed two important family weddings and been told i ruined them coz everyone was upset?.

  why if ihave tried to please them and tried once to get reinstated and now finally felt i have to be true to myself have i caused such pain all over again?.

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• 

  Cordelia

  thanks you two, now you should go and have a coffee together

  i keep finding things hard because my dad keeps crying and keeps asking me the same question over and over again ie. are u seeing the boy or not? and i say yes and that hurts him so much and then the boyfriend is a complete heartless immature prick and i wonder WHAT THE HELL I AM DOING?
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  63

  why cant they see how cruel they are??

  by Cordelia in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  why just because i am dfed (march) can my family and all the friends ive ever known tell me i am dead to them?.

  why have i missed two important family weddings and been told i ruined them coz everyone was upset?.

  why if ihave tried to please them and tried once to get reinstated and now finally felt i have to be true to myself have i caused such pain all over again?.

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  Cordelia

  God i feel so bad forstarting this thread!
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  32

  Are the experiences of unbaptised born-ins of less importance?

  by mrsjones5 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  are you saying that the experiences of unbaptised born-ins are of less importance than baptised born-ins and baptised walkins?.

  yes thats what i'm saying.....oh boy.

  wow, well tijkmo, i respect that youre brave for saying so and that's where that ends.

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  Cordelia

  poor tikjmo he didnt mean it that way! i think its just the fact that if you ARE baptized then you CAN be disfellowshipped along with all the shunning that comes even worse whan you are dfed not just faded,

  saying that tho from some of the posts ive read it seems like some peoples familys shun them even when they are just faded!

  so i say what i said on my post, that i think it depends on your family, some dfed peoples jw familys actually do have contact with them while some who have just faded dont!

  but to each and everyone of us our own experience is probably 'the worst one' and yes people who are brought up in it whether baptised or not have all been through the same problems, but depending on the family and friends we all have makes it hard or easier! (imo)
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  63

  why cant they see how cruel they are??

  by Cordelia in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  why just because i am dfed (march) can my family and all the friends ive ever known tell me i am dead to them?.

  why have i missed two important family weddings and been told i ruined them coz everyone was upset?.

  why if ihave tried to please them and tried once to get reinstated and now finally felt i have to be true to myself have i caused such pain all over again?.

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  Cordelia

  thanks everyone,

  i understand what you are saying tho i agree with tik lisa could have put it abit better! but i still know whatshe means, as for peoples experiences i always thought id get reinstated and then date the boy but i realise that alot of you who havent been dfed still find their family takes it really hard!

  on the other hand some who are dfed familys actually have ALOT of contact with them!

  so i guess it depends on the family,
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  53

  LOOKS OR PERSONALITY?

  by Mary in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  ok, if you had to choose between looks and personality, which wins?

  guys: if a girl is only mediocre in the looks department but is absolutely fab-u-lous in the personality dept...........which is more important to you?

  or are they equally important?

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  Cordelia

  i forgot about sexual attraction you gotta have that too, when i was married i used to think it wasnt important now i know better
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  25

  I want to see your children, but shun you!

  by free2beme in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have relatives in the jehovah's witness religion still, and in-laws.

  because my spouse and me were never officially disfellowshipped, they have a hard time with how to shun us.

  basically, they don't.

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  Cordelia

  it is horriable (and yet so comforting) tohear all your storys, i am shunned and have a 3 year old daughter, but im making a massive choice at the mo, which will result in me being 'dead' apparently to my family, you see my dad still talks slightly as i had been attending all the meetings and working towards reinstatement but i cant do it i cant be reinstated into that religon again, and since i have told them i have had so many problems, sometimes i think i should just go back coz how do you live with losing your family? what if they died or something and you have ruined their last years of life!!

  but you all have been through it and im so sorry and i am doing it too!

  i just hope that having a daughter i can force them to at least have some contact with her!!

  what a cruel religon!
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  63

  why cant they see how cruel they are??

  by Cordelia in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  why just because i am dfed (march) can my family and all the friends ive ever known tell me i am dead to them?.

  why have i missed two important family weddings and been told i ruined them coz everyone was upset?.

  why if ihave tried to please them and tried once to get reinstated and now finally felt i have to be true to myself have i caused such pain all over again?.

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  Cordelia

  its hard tho isnt it when being true to ourselves means hurting people we also love?

  tik did you write that?

  you are right tho they will prob never be happy anyway, did you ever regret getting reinstated??

  mrsjones are you still married. i have no hope if you werent even baptised and still got all that grief, when you stood by your hubby and endured so much did you ever expect him to be extra perfect, did you ever take it out on him??
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  45

  Hot sisters (or brothers) in your cong...

  by blakky in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i was just wandering.... was it just me or was everyone thinking about it..... ive been in a few congs where some of the sisters were absolutely drop dead gorgeous!

  my last cong here in sydney, there was about 160 publishers so the talent was every where... i remember having the hots for this sister, who happens to be the wife of the service overseer... she was xxx hot.

  i remember always having to wear my suit coat to the meeting to hide my excitement.. i think all the bro's must have thought the same thing.

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  Cordelia

  tik you are so sweet, i didnt think you were kidding at all.