hope you return someday. have enjoyed your posts and seems i first read one of them yrs. ago on H20? unfortunately, i'm sporadic on these boards due to being too busy and have missed much needed information.
have you considered one of the co-dependent meetups. you can check out information under cOda.org for meetings. they are everywhere in the world (just about) to help individuals deal w/their past and present, such as family of origin, or anything that has caused depression, pain, etc. they teach the fact generally one develops a drinking problem or a compulsion or addictive behavior (even religion) because they didn't have the skills and knowledge/introspection to deal w/life or what survival skills we used growing up to SURVIVE worked at that time but never really corrected the problems. something like that. i think it's an unbelievable life-skills program and have friends who have really benefitted and changed their lives.
best to you and take care.
NV1