JWdaughter

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Posts by JWdaughter

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  24

  new neighbors

  by Theredeemer in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so, my wife and i purchased a house about a month ago and recently we met our new neighbors.

  they are an older couple.

  they are very nice and even brought us cookies.. in conversation they brought up that they were mormons and mentioned how much they loved it.

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  JWdaughter

  Just say politely that you are happy that her religion works for her, but your experience with churches is that the hype and rhetoric doesn'treally match up to the reality so that you have become like a writer about religion-you would rather just SEE how her faith informs her life rather than being preached or witnessed to about it. Show, don't tell! That will give her an opportunity to be the nice person that she probably is without talking about her religion all the time. Just a thought!

  OR,you could just be kind and just let her know that you appreciate good neighbors and while you don't want the witnessing (they consider that "every member is a missionary"), you appreciate her family and community values and share many of them, but you won't be joining any church.

  Honestly, I think the first approach would be more successful, plus you will have a great neighbor.
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  50

  My family has known I'm an apostate

  by cognac in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i found out that my husband has not only gone to the elders, but has been going to members of my family about me over a period of a few years.

  this piece of news is just so depressing.

  i've been wondering how my family knew i didn't go and thats why so many of them have becoming more and more distant.

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  JWdaughter

  OH, and don't go being all noble and not revealing his cheating when it comes up (and it will). I refrained from telling the world what kinds of things my ex was up to before I divorced him and all the while he vilified me to EVERYONE we know. Don't be too 'classy' to keep all of it to yourself. But don't reveal it in a way that makes you just look petty.

  The one thing I wish I had been more of during my entire marriage and especially my divorce was strategic. He has been strategic in what is going on now that he has his eyes on another prize. Don't let him off the hook because you don't want to be some stereotype ex wife. I went totally anti-stereotype and it didn't help with the family, the kids or any other area. It didn't make me better (yes, I thought I would be "the better person"), he just screwed me over and I HELPED him by being passive regarding custody and finances.

  Sorry guys. I bought into years of conditioning and didn't want anyone to think I was a "gold digger" or what have you. 20 years of marriage (or 7) and 3 (or 2) kids is not just some game to get his stuff. Real life marriage has real life consequences. Don't let him off the hook or put yourself on it. Fair is not mean, greedy or grasping.
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  50

  My family has known I'm an apostate

  by cognac in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i found out that my husband has not only gone to the elders, but has been going to members of my family about me over a period of a few years.

  this piece of news is just so depressing.

  i've been wondering how my family knew i didn't go and thats why so many of them have becoming more and more distant.

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  JWdaughter

  Cognac, he was doing what he was "supposed" to be doing. As a JW. Not as a husband or a Christian or a friend, but he was pleasing his god the WTBTS/JW org.

  I'm so sorry. Looking at your posts for the last 6 years, you have been in a struggle the whole time. It's ironic that you learned TTATT so soon after marriage. You have two beautiful children and now you will be getting a fresh start-and knowing your enemy is better than being misled by him.

  It is sad to see that his first allegience on this earth is to the organization and relatives, rather than the wife he is supposed to be "one" with. He could have been honest but I think you went from being merely unenthusiastic(which probably suited him just fine) to being outright opposed to a degree that threatened him. He is happy to be a shirttail JW, but he doesn't want to lose it (family, friends) and so he will play the game that you are no longer willing to play.

  I'm so sorry, but you no longer have to pretend to anyone. I hope that it works for you in the end. You are finding out who really values you.

  All my best to you and your kids.
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  6

  "-- the anointed have been declared righteous for life--" did you know that.?

  by prologos in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  this might explain the reckless way with words of annointed glorious ones, .

  righteous for life- can do no wrong , until the rapture [since 1919], and then for here to eternity.. quoted from the daily text comment nov 11, 2014. .

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  JWdaughter

  How does that fit with the replacement 'anointed' that have been filling the slots of the unfaithful ex anointed? You know, the "Generation that will not pass away, Part B"
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  13

  Theory

  by Theredeemer in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  someone mentioned this in a post and i feel the need to make this theory its own thread.. i think that this past zone visit was intended to be that weird!

  i think it was a test of faith in this regard, are you loyal enough to ignore the crazyness of all that was stated?

  what if they are setting up for radical changes and are testing the waters to see if this current group of jdubs are going to readily drink the kool aid?.

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  JWdaughter

  Everyone keeps looking for some big method to the madness or plan or scheme. I think they are just a bunch of dumbasses doing dumbass things and there are nearly 8 million people who are buying into the stupidity.

  Some folks make dumb decisions and learn from them. Some people make it a lifestyle and think if they say it is brilliant enough, then it will be.
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  15

  Trolley Witnessing with Laika from JWN

  by KateWild in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  a while ago laika came to visit.

  we went to town and low and behold the jw trolleys were there doing their thing.. we approached the brother and i introduced laika, the brother was polite.

  i then went on to tell him that it was too difficult for me to return and be reinstated.

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  JWdaughter

  Kate, nice is the way to go. That doesn't mean doormat, it just means . . . nice! I hope I would handle things as you are, but when I left, and was announced as DA'd, I was afraid to talk to anyone because I knew they would reject me-they were already looking straight through me as if I were invisible. I admire that you aren't allowing people to do that to you WHILE you are still being kind.

  As to BOTR, there seems to be a lot of defensive posturing in her posts at times. I have enjoyed many of her posts over the years and I hope everything is ok.
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  42

  I Waited Until My Wedding Night To Lose My Virginity And I Wish I Hadn't...

  by Divergent in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  i found this article interesting & just wanted to share.

  after going through my teenage years trying to be the perfect jw, i realized that trying to live up to the standards imposed on me have been for worse & not for better.

  i was feeling miserable, repressed, unfulfilled, with a great lack of self confidence & self esteem.

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  JWdaughter

  We do tend to romanticize virginity, don't we? And losing it. And dying with it. For me, I always associated someone wanting to have sex with me as loving me(or thinking I was worthy in some way)-and vice-versa. How dangerous an illusion that was! I felt so unlovable that when that particular barrier was removed, I set about proving how desirable/lovable I really was.

  What a mess! Sex can be a beautiful and wonderful thing, but it sure can get twisted up with a lot of nonsense. The act doesn't do that-Our minds do.
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  24

  Muslim refuses to stand for the National Anthem

  by designs in

  1. social
  2. current

  cleveland cavaliers basketball player dion waiters stayed in the locker-room during the national anthem at a recent game.

  asked why he responded 'i am rededicating myself to my muslim faith'.

  another basketball player recently refused to stand for the anthem while on the court and was fined by the nba, dion chose to remain in the locker-room.. have you heard of followers of islam refusing to stand for the national anthem or to say the pledge of allegiance on religious grounds.. .

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  JWdaughter

  I have participated in two national anthems where the majority of the population 90-99% were Muslim and there was no lack of participation observed. No one was getting a scolding, so I am not sure where that comes from. I never heard of it and I have done some pretty serious Muslim things,like go to Mecca. No one ever gave a talk on the evils of national anthems. Arab countries all have them. I don't know of any Muslim countries that don't.

  Maybe he was in the locker room so that he could pray at the right time? I have never heard of that particular 'religious stand" in Islam or among Muslims or Muslim nations.
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  95

  Girls names

  by FeelingFree in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  ok so i know its not really anything to do with jwness but we are struggling with baby names and really can't think of one we both like.

  its getting a bit desperate as i'm due in about 8 weeks .. i'm getting bored of looking at the same old names on the baby names websites so any suggestions would be much appreciated (girls please).. **cash prize for the one we choose!

  ** ....... no not really lol.. .

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  JWdaughter

  Don't name her Virginia. Beautiful name, but shortened to Virgin (granted the emphasis sounds different than virgin, but STILL!) Good friend in elementary school with that name. I still suspect she quit school in the 7th grade from sheer embarassment.
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  95

  Girls names

  by FeelingFree in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  ok so i know its not really anything to do with jwness but we are struggling with baby names and really can't think of one we both like.

  its getting a bit desperate as i'm due in about 8 weeks .. i'm getting bored of looking at the same old names on the baby names websites so any suggestions would be much appreciated (girls please).. **cash prize for the one we choose!

  ** ....... no not really lol.. .

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  JWdaughter

  Rachel McKenna

  Laura Kathleen

  Kathleen (Katie)

  I like classic names, but those vary according to your language and culture. Noor or Nur means light, Nabila means noble. Binta means daughter.

  My main suggestion-a name that is light. To the tongue and to the ear. But not comical or ridiculous or too religious. Chastity and Charity are the kinds of names that beg for a rebellious teenager to fly in the face or it. Or get a sex change operation.

  Esperanza means Hope-I think that it is a beautiful name to the tongue and the ear and the heart.

  I have an Irish background and my kids names reflected that.

  CONGRATULATIONS ON THE NEW BABY!!! I'm happy for you-what a blessing.