Sidewinder, welcome. Your post answered your question. For most, they have heart connections that depend on playing the game and they can only really be free when anonymous. I like the mass DA letter, too. You saw with your girlfriend what JWs are up against. Coming together would be great but some really value their JWs relations and can't risk them. Your girlfriend could have you and lose everyone else. The price is high. Freedom isn't free and all that jazz.
The other issue is that instead of fighting the common foe, the wtbts, ex JWs attack each other for current belief or non belief. It distracts from building something to fight the enemy. The arrogance of being "right". The wtbts is screwed up in so many ways corporately and administratively and fiscally that the actual present theology is immaterial. The leadership is poisonous, nothing right can come from it. The trinity, evolution and Christmas are the least of the issues.