Posts by findingmyway

24

The story of my life (part 5- Bethel, the first shock)

by onacruse in

jw
friends

about 2 months after i arrived at bethel (late spring), i took my place at the breakfast table...awakened, as usual, by the 6 a.m. bell, a quick shower, and arriving with great anticipation for the 7 a.m. daily comments, with a few words from the "head of the table" (usually knorr, but they had recently started a weekly "cycling" of governing body members; part of the impending organizational elders restructuring).

the norm was to start eating at 7:30 a.m. (read "scoop the bowl and wolf it down"), and on the clock by 8 a.m.. but, on this day, something completely beyond my anticipation.

knorr starts off by saying that we should be prepared to sit for a while, as he proceeds, for 3 hours, to outline how a homosexuality "ring" has been operating at bethel for some time, including some gileadites.

findingmyway

Onacruse, this is THE story that I heard about. I never was able to get the details, but my cousin told me about this story. I wasn't sure how much, if any, of it was true.

12

Likening my exit from the JWs to a bad divorce

by findingmyway in

unlike those of you who made the choice to drift or fade away, i was df'd a few years ago and, at the time, i thought i would return.

with the passing of time, i am realizing that going back for the sake of mending family bonds is not a good enough reason to go back.

but my family has been holding out the hope that i will return.

findingmyway

Cordelia,

I've been df'd 4 times... I know, TMI. With the exception of this last time, each time I submitted a letter for reinstatement it was for my family. This last time, I did submit a letter - 2 actually - because I really felt that I was ready to "walk the walk" and my plea was rejected twice because of "my past." That would be my final attempt to return. I am a single parent now and therefore have a family of my own. I no longer think in terms of what my family (mother, father, siblings, etc.) wants, rather what my family (my son & myself) needs.

I've come a long way -- I can even track my progress, but I have an even longer way to go. I take it one step at a time. Looking back, I know that even if they had reinstated me that last time, it was never and never will be in my heart to be a JW. I would never "make the truth my own."

My best to you!

12

Likening my exit from the JWs to a bad divorce

by findingmyway in

unlike those of you who made the choice to drift or fade away, i was df'd a few years ago and, at the time, i thought i would return.

with the passing of time, i am realizing that going back for the sake of mending family bonds is not a good enough reason to go back.

but my family has been holding out the hope that i will return.

findingmyway

My friend says that ex-JW's are some of the bravest people on earth.

Brave, huh? I don't know how brave I feel, but I certainly do experience moments of insanity...especially after discussing the topic at nausea.

15

Singer finds her voice after leaving JW's

by Gopher in

good story about rene marie.

she speaks frankly about a good effect she found by joining the jw's, and how and why she left never to look back.

http://www.pacpub.com/site/myzwire.cfm?newsid=15292956&brd=1091&pag=461&dept_id=343157&rfi=6

findingmyway

I wonder what positive impact it would have on the WTBTS if they abandoned the cruel shunning policy?

Because my entire immediate family are all JWs, I know that I would still be attached to the religion on some level. However, in spite of the shunning, there are still major flaws in the doctrines that are taught. So I would suspect that they would keep people around a little longer or their membership may even increase. But for those who conduct their own research in their quest for truth, they may not hold on to them for long.

12

Likening my exit from the JWs to a bad divorce

by findingmyway in

unlike those of you who made the choice to drift or fade away, i was df'd a few years ago and, at the time, i thought i would return.

with the passing of time, i am realizing that going back for the sake of mending family bonds is not a good enough reason to go back.

but my family has been holding out the hope that i will return.

findingmyway

Unlike those of you who made the choice to drift or fade away, I was df'd a few years ago and, at the time, I thought I would return. With the passing of time, I am realizing that going back for the sake of mending family bonds is not a good enough reason to go back. But my family has been holding out the hope that I will return. I liken my experience to a wife separated from her husband who is realizing that she doesn't want to reconcile, but the husband doesn't want to let go. Right now, I can't bring myself to tell my family that I never want to be reinstated. So I am contributing to the hopes that they are holding onto by not being clear about that.

I don't know where I'm heading yet, but I know I won't ever go back. I hope one day soon, I'll find the strength to tell my family that I do not want to return to the organization.

17

Don't you sometimes just want to STOP talking about it?

by nicolaou in

there's some real nasty stuff going on in my family right now - many of my worst fears about being shunned are coming true and i fear for my mum's health because of all the stress she's under - seriously!.

but i just cannot bring myself to discuss it.

i'm just so sick and tired of the whole thing...

findingmyway

Hi Nic,

I am sorry for what you are going through right now, but I understand exactly what you mean. It can be more than a drag at times. My entire immediate family (parents & siblings) are all baptized JWs, and so are most of my extended family on my mother's side. No matter how much I try to run from this, like Blondie said, it will always be a part of me. I personally find it difficult because I feel like I can't escape the organization because (1) my parents live a block away and (2) because my boyfriend wants to know all the details so that he can support me. Like you, I hate talking about it. Hopefully, I'll get to a point when it will have less of a hold on my life. Unfortunately, I think that will mean me moving away frm my family and starting my life completely over.

23

E-mail from a Former JW Friend

by findingmyway in

hey sweets:.

hope all is well.

it is not a day that goes by that i don't think about you and wonder will i ever get the chance to be with you again.

findingmyway

How's this?

Hey there! I'm sorry to just get back to you, but I've been crazy busy planning this conference for my firm's diversity committee (www.2005DiversitySummit.com). I'm glad it's finally over because that was my life for the past 6 months. Anyway, I'm so happy to hear from you and to hear that life is good for you. I bet Miss [her daughter's name here] is just a perfect little independent lady much these days. 2nd grade! It seems like just yesterday that [my son's name here] was in the 2nd grade. He's in the 4th now. It seems like the older they get the closer they become in age. I guess 2 years isn't a lot. Life is going well for me also. Like I said I've been working hard too. Balancing mommyhood, school and career gets a little bit overwhelming at times, but overall everything is great! I love you too! Kiss Bri for me. Take care, Nikki

23

E-mail from a Former JW Friend

by findingmyway in

hey sweets:.

hope all is well.

it is not a day that goes by that i don't think about you and wonder will i ever get the chance to be with you again.

findingmyway

I was df'd about 4 years ago (I think...I really can't remember exactly) and she's been pleading for me to return to the organization. When I was first df'd I thought I wanted to go back, but over the past year, I realized that, for numerous reasons, I just don't want to be one of Jehovah's Witnesses. It started when I lost my fear of Armageddon and death. We were close, but that was years ago and I've outgrown all the JWs that I once had close relationships with. I simply cannot relate to them.

23

E-mail from a Former JW Friend

by findingmyway in

hey sweets:.

hope all is well.

it is not a day that goes by that i don't think about you and wonder will i ever get the chance to be with you again.

findingmyway

Hey Sweets: Hope all is well. It is not a day that goes by that I don't think about you and wonder will I ever get the chance to be with you again. Life is going great for me. Working hard and trying to maintain. [her daughter] is in 2nd grade this year. Getting big and a very independent young lady. I saw [my son's name here] at the meeting last week he is a young handsome man. I couldn't believe how big he was. So, what going on with you? How has life been treating you. Since we never bite our tongue "What is the hold up with you?" Are you having fun, do you have a boyfriend, what's going on. I never thought it would be this long. Whatever it is, don't stay gone to long, try to work to get yourself together. I love you and I would do anything to make it like it use to be. Always, know I love you and I long for the day to hang out with you. Hugs & Kisses -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
She periodically sends me emails to check in on my and I usually reply "I'm doing fine....all is well...hope to see you soon.", but I rolled my eyes when I read this. I really don't know how to reply. She sent this on 9/21 and I've been to busy until now to even focus on this, but I don't want to tell her or anyone else that I will never be reinstated and I'm never coming back. I know she's sincere, but what's the deal with wanting to know if I'm having fun. She clearly doesn't know me because she makes it out like I'm out here partying. I'm living my life like any other normal person. Yes, I have a wonderful boyfriend. I go to work everyday. I'm taking classes online and I expect to complete my degree in 2 years. What exactly does she expect to hear? I bet they think that everyone who leaves the organization leads lives of debauchery and filth. I'm not sure yet, but I doubt that I'll respond to her.

12

My mother attended a non-JW wedding reception today

by findingmyway in

my parents's best friends' (bro.

elder and sis.

pioneer) eldest unbaptized son got married today to his second child's mother.

findingmyway

So you never know your Mom might come and simply never tell anyone. Who knows, probably depends on her mood at the time too.

Maybe...she's so weird...I never know what to expect from her. Sometimes she answers the phone, "what" and sometimes (today, for example) she answers it "hello" (singing hello). It's too much back and forth and bi-polar for me, so I just leave her to herself. If I do get married, I'll invite her to my wedding. In fact, I'll invite the entire family. If they come, they come. If they don't, they don't. My life will go on.