M*A*S*H

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Posts by M*A*S*H

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  39

  Ideas for bumper stickers/signs...what can you come up with?

  by AuldSoul in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  from kid-a's post on another thread: millions once living are now dead!.

  607 bc?.

  watchtower bedded the beast (1991-2001).

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  M*A*S*H

  Another wasted lunch break....

  Back Off! Apostate Onboard.

  Jehovah's Witnesses do it at the Kingdom Hall.

  The Jehovah's always Knock twice.

  'God built the pyramids' CT Russel

  Be a Jehovah's Witness It's cheaper at Christmas

  Shunning is loving.

  My other Watchtower makes sense.

  Watchtower's Used to be 30p Now I can't give this shit away

  I don't ask questions
  I'm a Jehovah's Witness.

  I'm one crash away from paradise.

  The Anointed just in it for Bread & Wine.

  Jehovah talks to me but I ain't listening

  'Only the newest truth will do' - WTBS

  Blood transfusions are for pussies. Sorry about the formatting... the HTML thingy is poo!
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  54

  The end is nigh

  by IP_SEC in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  do you guys think we are sufficiantly along in the month of october to be able to say that the end isnt coming in the fall of '05?.

  when i was a dub i really thought the end was coming this month.. 1975+30= 2005. if adam was 30 when eve was created this would be the end of the 5000 years of since jahs last rest.. eve created, jah rest for 1000 years (1k years is as one day to jovah) he picks up work again 1000 years after eve is created.

  now in 2005 that means he has just 1 more "day" until the next great 1k years sabbath.

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  M*A*S*H

  Elijah...
  
  

  Ignore these non believing heathens... they will be destroyed in that great day, AMEN!

  I still think that God in his wisdom will instruct you to create a web site, so your direct channel to God can be fully utilised and shared with those in need of your spiritual nourishment.

  Thanks for heads up on Nov 11 BTW...

  Has Jah told you anything about the Riots in Birmingham, UK... for the future?
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  39

  Ideas for bumper stickers/signs...what can you come up with?

  by AuldSoul in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  from kid-a's post on another thread: millions once living are now dead!.

  607 bc?.

  watchtower bedded the beast (1991-2001).

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  M*A*S*H

  
  What a terrible thread.... I've started and can't stop!

  Don't think.. join the borg

  Reading this makes you an Apostate!

  God Kills

  Armageddon the last day of your life.

  1914, 1918, 1975, whatever...

  New light, more blinding, great.

  Do what the slave class says?

  Dur-Crap! Holy Spirit Batman.

  Awake! Oh the irony.

  Inspired of God ...unless we heard him wrong...

  Todays truth, tomorrows cover up.

  "Turn the other cheek" Jehovah of Armies

  'The flood happened' Watchtower TM

  "Seduce a virgin, get paid." Exodus 22:16 & 17

  No doubt I'll be posting some more later...
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  5

  Welcome M*A*S*H!

  by Legolas in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  welcome to the board!

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  M*A*S*H

  Thanks very much... How kind... my own personal welcome thread.

  I must confess though I'm not totally new, just a lazy poster.

  Thanks again...
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  89

  How the Internet Means 'The End' for Apostates and Opposers of the Society

  by slimboyfat in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  the received wisdom is that the internet has dramatically damaged the ability of the watchtower society to gain and retain followers.

  there was a very eloquent article to that effect written some time ago by a commentator who attempted to buttress his argument with reference to the postmodern condition and the breakdown of metanarratives in todays secular society, nay, even the come-back for enlightenment notions of truth.

  in the 1970/80s there were major challenges to the watchtowers theology (great crowd in heaven) and chronology (1914) in norway, alberta canada, dublin ireland and in the newyork bethel itself: but the damage caused by those involved in the dissent was limited because knowledge was dispersed merely through personal contact and minimal use of obscure publications that seldom met the eyes of witnesses innocent of the watchtowers doctrinal and chronological vacillations in any case.

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  M*A*S*H

  The only thing the internet has reduced... or put a halt to... is the amount of pornagraphic literature you find in parks or under park benches. Personally I feel this is a great shame, every now and then I like to purchase something off the 'top shelf' and leave some of the pages lying about in our local park.

  Down with the internet, up with the top shelf.
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  26

  WHAT DOES HAPPEN AFTER DEATH????

  by chuckyy in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  we all know the jw view on what happens at death.

  however a friend of mine lost a very young son and went to a medium.

  the medium told her the name of her son without knowing anything about her or even knowing that she had a child that died.

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  M*A*S*H

  Personally I believe mediums to be on the same playing field as magicians, clever trickery can make it seem even the laws on Physics have been broken. When you watch a magician make a bunny rabbit disappear - you don't think 'Wow... he vanished Thumper!?'...no, you think, 'Wow, what a cool trick - just because I don't understand it, doesn't make real magic!'. The major difference in attitude is magicians don't claim to have 'special powers'... and we just enjoy the show.

  As you weren't not present for this reading from the Medium, it's difficult to say how 'amazing' the show was. Mediums usually get all the information they need for a 'cold reading' from the person sitting opposite!

  If you've never seen or heard of him - look up Derren Brown, he's a 'magician' in the UK who employees many of the tricks of mediums and alike... except he always explains that it's all trickery! Sometimes he gives you clues how it's done. It really is worth looking up! He has a DVD out I think.

  M*A*S*H

  PS. I should be on commision.
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  42

  Have I been red flagged?

  by searching4? in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i find it very weird that in 13 years, not one jw has come knocking on my door.

  i don't live in my home town and have had no contact with witnesses ( besides my mom) since i was disfellowshipped in 1992. is it possible that my mom ( still a witness) has alerted the local kingdom hall and had me placed on the " do not call" list?

  or maybe i just live in the area of slacker witnesses?

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  M*A*S*H

  The answer is obvious... the holy spirit guides them away from your door...
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  37

  What Decisions Did You Make Only Because You Were A Witness?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i believe that most jws are deep down inside angry over the fact that they went along with the status quo and the majority just to be accepted.

  some witnesses would like to have a tattoo, a mustache, a shaved head, a beard, a new red sportscar, etc.

  but they don't because they would be viewed as "immature".

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  M*A*S*H

  I stopped believing in God.
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  48

  SIGN OF JONAH REVEALED BY: The King of "New Jerusalem" upon the earth

  by EliJah in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  to all that love g_d, jah, allah

  i am a messenger of jah in our modern day with the task of leading the flock of jah under authority of jesus christ reigning from the heavens above.

  the prophets of old were put into place as testimony of the authentication of the word of jah.

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  M*A*S*H

  Hi Elijah

  Wow. That's amazing... you certainly must feel proud of your divine assignment! It certainly looks like our time is up... things are definately about to happen.

  I love the way you cut through all the crap and concentrate purely on the lord's words, as directed. It's wonderful...

  Surely you must have a web site? I think such divine inspired words of wisdom must be in place online for all to share? Don't you think?

  M*A*S*H
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  58

  Did Noahs Ark drift about aimlessly in the Great Flood?

  by EliJah in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  no where does it mention that noah traveled around the world in his big boat.

  in fact, is says that the ark was floating "high above the earth".

  also, what does matthew mean about "just like in the days of noah?

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  M*A*S*H

  Low-Key Lysmith: Where did all the water go? What a silly question... after being on the ark all that time, all the animals would be thirsty! The rest of the water is still in circulation today, order a glass of the 'house' wine in any pub!

  As for the build up of manure, that wouldn't be a problem - it's a well known fact that it's virtually impossible to do a 'number two' in front of a stranger... so basically they held it in. Proof of this is easy to find - as most animals can cross their legs.

  Many wonder how Noah got all the insects on board - well that's easy. Most were captured the night before the flood, as he accidentally left a light on in the ark, the remaining insects were collected during the heat of the next day by leaving a small strawberry cheesecake on the roof of the ark.

  It seems also you guys don't understand how the ark 'got about'... come chaps, use your heads! Basically Noah glued all the birds feet to the roof of the ark, a special opening on the North, East, South and West would of been created just big enough for a Giraffe holding a bag of chips to put his head through - the birds would try to fly to get the chips, thus giving directional control.

  If I've missed anything, just let me know... I'm here to help.