looking forward to the rest Steve. I always enjoy your posts.....
freedomlover
JoinedPosts by freedomlover
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12
Painful Memories of Mark
by jst2laws inthe recent suicide of ary (puternut) has me going through some emotions that i should have finished decades ago but now they have come back with intensity.
if you are interested, i want to share with you the story of my brother, mark.
i was a teenager when my mother learned she was again pregnant.
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46
Tell me something embarrasing about yourself
by doodle-v ini'll start... i talk to myself.
a lot.
i'll even hold full blown conversations.
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freedomlover
about the only thing I can think of is I HATE maggots. If the garbage ever gets them I can't even look at them or I start gagging. It's like an uncontollable gag! EWWWW! it's so gross just thinking about it!
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Feelings about disfellowshipping, etc.
by lostlantern ini was reading a post on here from a young man who will be facing a judicial committee for a sin he committed.
he is asking for advice on what to do.
a lot of feelings came rushing in on me as i thought back to how my brother was unfairly treated by an elder body.
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freedomlover
wonderful post. I agree totally with all your thoughts. especially about elders children being given the "free pass." I've seen that so many times......
btw - welcome - glad to see you here.
freedomlover -
19
Fading ain't goin' so well.
by atypical ini've been wanting to post updates for awhile, but i have been paranoid that my posts would make it too easy to identify me.
right now i don't care, so here's what's happening if it's helpful for anyone else who is trying to fade.. first of all, as of my last update i was still hanging around some of the witnesses socially and it came back to bite me.
after that mess, i pretty much gave up on even trying to pretend i can have much in common with most of the people at the hall.
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freedomlover
atypical- sorry to here this. it just sucks doesn't it??!!
good for you having fun with your real friends.
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19
To DA or not to DA that is the question
by lola28 inhi guys, as most of you know i have been inactive for a bit ( august of 2004 was the last time i turned in time) i changed congregations in december and have pretty much faded.
last night i had a talk with someone and he asked me why i was still in, why not just da?.
my answer ?.
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freedomlover
Lola - you have no idea right now how timely this thread is for me - thanks for starting it.
events in my life in the last few hours have all of a sudden made me start thinking of DAing myself again. I keep going back to "it's not NECESSARY" or "I just want to fade" and then I put the DAing thing aside. I truly feel that I'm going to have to face the DAing monster head on soon.
All the comments on here have just helped me more than you all know. I am truly thankful and lucky to have all of you wise people around me. -
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What 'Brokeback Mountain' and JWs have in common
by Peter123 inthe story is beyond excellent.
every line is so well crafted and the story, published in the new yorker magazine in 1997, is much more than two young men falling in love.
one of the major themes of the movie is fear.
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freedomlover
interesting similarities. enjoyed your thoughts.
welcome Peter!
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14
Go On Growing in Knowledge.... remember this article.... ?
by AK - Jeff inthis article in the 8-15-1993 watchtower is classic.
i recall there was a diagram of a human brain with a depiction of the layers of mental 'permafrost'.
i have highlighted a few points.
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freedomlover
OH LORD! I remember that article and all the gushing remarks on the depth and wisdom of that article.
so strange to read it from this side of the fence now......... -
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Jehovah baby: you were my better-half, but just an invitation to the blues.
by tetrapod.sapien inlosing jehovah was like losing a girlfriend that you loved.
you barely had time to flinch when you found out that she had been sleeping with all your friends and stealing your records to pawn off.
that you had just been another sucker on the vine.. when jehovah dumps you, you start looking at yourself longer and harder, and wondering what it was about him that you found in yourself, until all you see there in the reflection is just yourself, dancing with an imaginary hand and waistline.. when jehovah was gone, and the war was over, i realized that all the things that had made me "good", and "moral", and "hate what was bad", didn't mean anything to me anymore.
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freedomlover
"jehovah was like a girlfriend/boyfriend that you broke up with"
(sorry - on a mac - can't cut and paste your words exactly)
that's exactly the degree of heartbreak I felt at first. It was agonizing and sickening to me.
it will always be there to some degree, like onesong said - it makes you a new and better person - well most of the time. -
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What 'crutches' have you employed to break the mind control?
by AK - Jeff inonce we determined that the 'truth' was not, there was much more to do in getting deprogrammed.
i have become aware that i have used a few mental games to 'unlock' from the watchtower mindmeld.
cussing.
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freedomlover
I'm still trying to remember to say "bless you" when someone sneezes.
that will be a big mental break for me.
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12
A little more about me.....
by mandivided inhey everyone,.
just want to thank everyone for responding so positively to my first post (a long rant...and a new beginning).
thought i'd share a little of mys story...well maybe alot of my story!.
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freedomlover
Joe - I think the majority of us can relate to the guilt we feel for how we treated people when we were JW's. Have you thought about writing a letter to this girl that was your friend that died? It would just be for you. Write out everything you feel you needed to ever say to her and then when your ready you can burn the letter and let it go. Just an idea that has worked for me with certain issues.
Glad your so willing to share your story. You are among like minded people here.
-freedomlover