When things began to come to a head for us, was when we confronted an elder and his family about child abuse
that had happened many years earlier. We had asked for some of the other elders to be present. Of course the
charge was denied. BUT- then the elder and his family spread slanderous gossip about us. This elder even told
some of our friend things personally. He told everyone that we were turning apostate (we weren't at that time).
This one friend of ours was really upset and took it to the CO. The CO told this elder to say he was sorry - not even to us -just to our friend. I was so upset, I told the "friend" that I wanted nothing to do with such a bunch of
liars or with Jdubs. Of course, the friend decided that she could have nothing to do with me anymore too. You
know that the CO was right.
Another example:
My in-laws have never had much to do with our children. Never visiting (they live several hundred miles away)
never calling them, not even letters or cards. Maybe a small (very small) gift once a year or so. (usually around
Christmas)
Anyway - when we decided to leave Jdubs, my mother-in-law calls and says "how can you do this to me? You
are killing my grandkids." We told her that the kids were not babtized and they were welcome to write or call
the kids. No response except "you are killing my grandkids, how can you do this to me?"
The Jdubs cultivate a type of 'love' that is based on how things look to other Jdubs, and how it will effect them.
Very selfish!!