is it just me, or does there seem to be a flood of new people on the board lately?
i think it's awesome!.
welcome to all newcomers.
Hi TallTexan
Thanks for the great encouragement. I lurked hear for ages and was petrified to join, but since I have Ifeel like I am finally mending at coming to terms with how my life was and what its about to become.
All the best to you and thanks for making us welcome!
Mercedes x
i just caught a new first posting by leftbelow and wanted to be the first to welcome them and comment on how nice and unselfish their first post was (on unique1's thread).
however the listener got in first so i shall be the second!.
welcome leftbelow - don't be nervous - you are among a cool crowd who are interested in what you have to say and think.
Welcome Leftbelow. Keep lurking and you will one day find the courage to be truly free.
This is a great site for you to start your journey.
All the best
Mercedes x
first let me start off by saying i am very sick myself right now.
i have a virus that settled in my nerves (very very painful and no it isn't herpes), and now two weeks in i caught a very bad upper respiritory bronchities.
i spent my day in bed as i have been for most of two weeks now with no end in sight (dammit).. not trying for sympathy points, but this just isn't a good time for this!.
Sherry I hope you are feeling better by now. I am sorry to hear about your Dad, such a shame that family relationships can be so fractured by this religion. You cant get back time with loved ones and I liked that you sent flowers,why stoop to their level
Mercedes x
my wife and i have been married 6 years now.
she was a jw when we married as is her entire family.
i was, and still am, very attracted to her because of the way she carries herself and her compassion.. i would like anyone who has had a similar experiance or was a jw to better help me understand what is going on in their heads when it comes to birthdays and such.
Hi there and welcome.
You will probably find that most jw are confused themselves as to why they couldnt celebrate birthdays. It seems odd that they have wedding anniversaries but not birthdays. This was a sore point with myself and when I asked an elder about it, because the 2 examples used in the bible of birthdays gone wrong just doesnt wash with me, he said because it has pagan origins.
But so does a wedding ceremony when one wears a white dress, has bridesmaids, and exchanging of rings. Do some research on the origins of birthdays and weddings and see if you can spot any differences. I did and couldnt believe that you can have anniversaries but not a birthday!
Regards Mercedes x
part 1:
when we were faced with tough issues as jws, we used one or more of a few ways to find answers.
we either searched the publications, consulted with an elder, or in some cases, wrote to the society.
Very hard question to answer. Their is no easy way for this couple and only they can make the decision.We had a child born with severe birth defects. We knew from our 1st ultrasound she would be a very sick child, but we were prepared for everything as we couldnt allow an abortion. Now we have left jw, I would have preffered an abortion over the hell we went through carrying our baby and the nightmare watching her die.But the again we wouldnt have held her beautiful body, named her and had all her family meet her for the short time she was here. Their are fors and againsts in every situation and they need to weigh these up
All the best for them
Mercedes x
was this just a local arkansas thing or were jw's everywhere getting jiggy at the skating rink?
we used to have awesome skating parties and witnesses from 150 miles away would come sometimes.
or sometimes we would drive that far to go to one.
We had really good skating parties as well in the 80s but as Blondie mentioned they soon got canned. Some were complaining that the music was demonic, so a Brother took a kingdom melodies tape to the rink and asked the DJ if he would play that instead!. How embarrasing.Then a brother broke both wrists and that was taken as a sign of demonism again.
It only takes a few to start complaining and thats it, the party is over. Same with theme parties we had great ones at our own home, all the young ones came. My last theme party at MY OWN HOME, ended in a local needs talk on"why do you have to have a theme for your party"? Little did I realise at the time , about 10 I had invited didnt show up, decided to boycott it then complaing to an elder that their conscience was bothered by my having a theme party.Needless to say the s#%t hit the fan and my husband stepped down out of disgust. The elder was counseled by the other elders, apparently they didint know he was going to talk about that, but to late damage was done.Anyway it opened our eyes a little more and now we have GREAT THEME PARTIES AT HOME YEAH!!!
Mercedes x
i've started to talk to hubby about things.
i started with the lack of love in the congs and he readily agrees.
how "worldly" friends are so much more loving than the so called jw "friends" (which we don't have anymore).. next i'd like to talk about the changes the "society" has made in recent years, how it's so hard to keep up with things now, it changes all the time.. can you help me with a list of changes and some wt references that i can discuss with him?.
Bumble Bee use the internet to th full! Research everything you can and write it down. I did this then showed my husband all the changes the society has made. Get a hold of COC book, its very informative. My husband wanted to know where I got my information from so get the facts straight first, print out articles(like the U.N scandal i got form their website) and slowly bring things up.
It didnt bother my husband about the lack of love, he felt you should be in it for Jehovah anyway, but doctrinal changes and many scandals I came across did bother him so I worked on those.
Good Luck
Mercedes x
hey, just hoping i can encourage my friend (a long-time lurker) in some way during a difficult time.
i'm trying to help my (anonymous, genderless, of mysterious location...) friend appreciate the joy of being true to yourself and thus discovering many kinds of freedom.
it's a rough time, more so for some than others.
It has taken time and continues to but I have never felt such peace and less stressed these last few months.My husband and I were just talking about how we could have stayed in as long as we did(all our family are in thats why).
We are still the same people, much happier because we have more time to spend with each other and the kids. We have made some really nice friends and we are just happy to enjoy life one day at a time. All the best
Mercedes x
about two weeks ago, i had a fallout with my mother and sister.
they totally overreacted to a situation and said some pretty nasty things, called me apostate and said they never wanted to see me again.
i tried my hardest to not react the same way, and try to explain some things but they didn't want to listen.
Hi Bumblebee. Sounds like we have the same mum. Mine reacted the same way when we were leaving, we had very heated arguments and she thought I had turned apostate. But she soon turned around and realised I havent changed that much and she still loves me as her daughter even though she doesnt agree with us leaving.
Our relationship now is good although a little strained at times(my dad has no problem and doesnt hassle us about going back)and she is a good grandparent to our kids even though at times she tries to take them to meetings, we have now put a stop to it.Keep doing good things to your family and you will be rewarded. All the best
Mercedes x
hi, i just got registered and am looking forward to getting to know others who have escaped from the controlled environment that i was so faithful to for so long.
i hope to meet others with similar backgrounds.
i've been out about 4yrs and love the feel of it, but to be honest, as much as a definiate decision it was on my part, there was still a long time of adjustment.
Welcome and I hope you enjoy this site as much as I have I am only new too and the best thing I ever did was sign on and start getting involved. Then you can start to heal
Mercedes x
