Dan - Seriously, you need to spend less time 'defending' God, less time harrassing your wife for still being a JW, less time harrassing and challenging other people for their beliefs and disbeliefs, less time posting on this or any other discussion board, and MORE time with a trained therapist who can help you sort out your own life.
For your own sake and for the sake of your children, get a therapist. They are trained to listen and to help you focus on YOUR issues.
Trust us. You have serious, pressing issues that need to be addressed by a professional - NOW.
-Aude Sapere (meaning: Dare to Know; Dare to Have Wisdom/Understanding)