AuldSoul, I deeply appreciate your posts in this thread. They have been very helpful to me in my development. However, I always appreciate your posts.
I'm sure that many of you will be able to relate to my own experience. While I was a JW, the scriptures (particularly the NT) seemed to have somewhat of a sterile feeling to them; as we were always to read and meditate on these scriptures through the pre-established paradigm of the "Organization". I never truly felt as though any of the verses were really speaking to me; but were merely speaking about "the organization" and how we as robotic minions must fit into this monolithic structure called the "Spirit-directed organization".
When I bought a NIV translation of the Bible, and began to read the New Testament without any regard to Watchtower publications, the scriptures felt pleasantly unfamiliar. Many verses that I had read a hundred times; seemed as if I was being introduced to them for the first time. It was an amazing experience. It was particularly amazing to begin to read the books of Romans and Galatians without looking at them through the interpretative lenses of WTS publications. Reading these scriptures through the interpretative lenses of the WTS was like watching a black and white television. When I began to read other translations without WTS publications; it was like watching a color TV. For the first time; I really began to feel as if Paul was speaking to me personally. The scriptures took on such a richer, and deeper meaning.
This made me particualrly interested even further as to why the Watchtower Society discourages private Bible study without the use of their publications to suppliment it. I began to think about the concept of Biblical suppliments. Why does something need suppliments unless it is deficient in some way? Why does truth need to be supplimented with a magazine that has changed it's teachings over and over again with the whims of it's writers? I have reached the conclusion that the Watchtower's sole purpose has been a tool for indoctrination. It has been the hammer that pounds the collective thinking of JWs into one unanimous script that can be parroted back to people through cliche-laden talking points.
As Randall Watters has pointed out; it is not really unity that the WTS is seeking; it is unanimity. True unity is something achieved through true love and spirit. Unanimity is reached through brute force. In the case of JWs, unanimity is manifested through a process of indoctrination that uses guilt and fear as it's tools of manipulation. Why else would they print children's books with graphic illustrations of people dying at Armageddon? (i.e. latest Great Teacher book)
AuldSoul, I share so many of your thoughts and feelings. As for me, my days are numbered. It is only a matter of time before I am disfellowshipped for Apostacy. It will be very painful losing my family; but it will also be somewhat of a relief; as I will be able to close this chapter of my life for good.