Posts by merfi

It's been a few months since I've even logged on to here. Must be part of the healing to not *need* JWD so much. A good thing I think, but it's still interesting to check back and see what's going on.

I haven't found the info thread yet, but I just got the inkling that they changed the BS "arrangement"? Interesting. But then, I changed my own BS arrangement a couple years ago and just.don't.go. To any of it. Idiots.

I was approached by a somewhat mental, all-foam-no-beer type of JW the other day while waiting for a chick friend to do lunch. She's all like "I sure do miss you." I say "at MEETINGS?" (all incredulous) She says "yeah... [mumble about "truth" and "right"].." I told her "I am NEVER going back to that crap and there isn't enough time in a day to tell you why" She looked at me kinda dumb (see above comment about all-foam) and I straight out said "It's a cult, Noreen. It's f*cked up." and walked off before I got too frustrated with a brainwashed drone to whom I could make no progress anyway.... It did feel kinda good dropping an f-bomb on a JW. haha

And onto happier news -- I'm getting married in three months! I was somewhat proposed to December 30th (he showed me a printout of my ring and said "it'll be here Wednesday"... uh... ok. No down-on-one-knee, that one! LOL), so the last few months have been filled with silk vs real flowers, ribbons, organza, dress-shopping, pearls, blue garters, lime green ink and monograms. Ahhh, I love this! We're having an outdoor ceremony on August 8th with about 30 family and friends. Then a big partay shebang on the 23rd. We wanted 8-8-08 but since a Friday would be hard for out of towners, we're having the reception on a Sat and the first available was then. So... My invite list is out of control and I'm almost hoping for a 50-75% return on the 460+ that are on the list. eek.

My ex is a hypocritical JW still and my poor kids are catching on. They're 10, 12 and 14 and smart. They see and smell ("mom, papa came in three times after being outside and he smelled like those icky black cigarettes. Why doesn't he just TELL us he smokes?!") his double life and it bugs them that he tells them to 'be good' and all that JW conforming crap, yet he's doing many things contrary. I guess the good things about him being like that is that they see just how f'd up that whole JW thing is and it also opens them up to and with me. When they tell me about yet another of his double-life things, I tell them that they can ask me anything and that I have no (well, relatively speaking) secrets. So it's brought us closer -- serendipity. And interesting thing my oldest said the other day was that she thinks that the reason the JWs around town are so weird towards my kids is that they know they're (my kids and myself) are having fun and enjoying life and they (JWs) aren't and don't get to. Nailed that one, kid.

The kids are mostly ok with my impending marriage. He has no kids of his own and jumping into the Weird Years, so there's been a few trials here and there. We all want it to work and go as smooth as possible, yet are realistic enough to know there will be bumps. So we talk a lot and work stuff out and move on to the next change.

So that there folks is my little rambly update. Hopefully all of you are finding peace as well, one way or another.

~merfi

26

Non-traditional marriage proposal -- she ask him?

by merfi in

jw
friends

your thoughts?.

.

(thinking about it...).

merfi

Hmm, my post is resurrected. Oompa -- I think, even in the past month or so since I've posted that, we've gotten to that point. We've talked about "after the house is done" (remodel/rebuild sorta thing) being the "when" to getting married. So no hurry, probably no proposal needed, we'll just up and make it official one of those days future... It's one of those things we simply 'know'.

~merfi

7

Am I the only one to see this.....

by JH in

jw
friends

yesterday, a poster brought back many old threads and, on all of them, i see november 29th 1999...... go to page 6991 or 6992 of the "active topcs" and let me know what date you see.... i pm'd a mod and she didn't know what i was talking about.....so wondered if this was only me..... .

.

merfi

I saw it yesterday, too. But figured it was some sort of glitch, maybe related to Jack Crabbe or Barney or whatever the hell was going on.

~merfi

32

Do Witnesses REALLY Care About Other People?

by minimus in

jw
friends

i don't think so.. to me, the vast majority of jws become witnesses because they desire everlasting life.

they want to live in paradise.

they love feeling special.

merfi

I care about people more now as an ex-JW than I ever did as a JW. Then, people were numbers on a time slip... Now, people are friends, family, friendly souls in parking lots, old people who need help reading shirt tags or carrying something and so on...

~merfi

37

Were any gadgets/new technology condemned in your congregation?

by badboy in

jw
friends

any takers?

merfi

They weren't too happy when I'd get football scores via text messages during Sunday afternoon meetings...

~merfi

65

what song best describes your sex life

by karter in

jw
friends

sound of silence.. as my wife is a j.w all along the watchtower!

!.

merfi

give it to me one more time la la la lala or something like that. LOL

Tom Jones -- Do That To Me One More Time

Britney (what is my deal tonight...??) -- Hit Me Baby One More Time

lol

~merfi

65

what song best describes your sex life

by karter in

jw
friends

sound of silence.. as my wife is a j.w all along the watchtower!

!.

merfi

311's "Frolic Room"

Britney Spears' "Perfect Lover"

(I know you said one song... but....and I apologize for the Britney reference)

~merfi

30

On ...

by compound complex in

jw
friends

on being discarded by the love of your life.

on getting on with your life.

on going downhill (physically, emotionally, or while taking a walk).

merfi

On Being Discarded by the Love of Your Life -- I found another Love of my life

On Getting on With Your Life -- sometimes easier said than done; talking JW here. At times I want to do horrible things to the JW that crapped on me like pull pranks, write letters... but then realize that they're just delusioned people living a fairy tale they're happy in and really, not worth my time or energy to burst their little freaky bubble. My life is so immensely happy right now that the past 1.5 years I've been out have made up for the 15 crummy years in.

On Going Downhill (physically, emotionally, or while taking a walk) -- Physically -- I'm 39 and doing pretty well for the most part. My appendix decided to do the 'childhood' thing and rupture last month, so it's been a bit more of a recovery than if I WAS a 10 year old... Emotionally -- I'm on top of the hill. Taking a walk -- I find good shoes offer necessary tread.

On Dieting -- meh. I don't.

On Being a Princess -- After being treated like a frog by the ex, I know now what it's like being a princess to the right man....

On Celibacy -- I was celibate for 7 months once.

On Not Sweating the Small Stuff -- as single mom to three kids, working FT blah blah (you know the story) -- this is my mantra!

On True Friends Whom You May Never Meet in Person -- I love my "imaginary friends" on the db I visit, turn to them for advice, can share my good and bad with them, have 'coffee' with them w/out having to get dressed or shower (bonus) and 'see' them all hours of the day.

~merfi
(can't resist posts like this)

26

Non-traditional marriage proposal -- she ask him?

by merfi in

jw
friends

your thoughts?.

.

(thinking about it...).

merfi

If he says no, will you stay with him?

Yeah.

We've been together for 10 months, through a lot of wonderful things and not-so-wonderful things (his dad passed away this year). I met him on a Thursday night (hahahaha old 'meeting night' --oh thank goodness I'm out or I'd have missed this man), went out Friday and Saturday nights, NY Eve was a Sunday night and he stayed over ... We've both been slapped silly by how much and how strong we felt so fast, but it hasn't faded but only strengthened. He's broken down every wall that my stupid JW ex caused me to put up... I trust my heart completely in his. We're planning on having me and my little people move into a house he's building (should be done next summer) and the "M" word has been tossed around a tiny bit. Neither of us really feel like we need the piece of paper to be 'us', so maybe it's just the romantic (?) in me wanting it official. So it might not even be a matter of me actually asking him, but saying something along the lines of "ya wanna?"

~merfi
(getting all swoony)