It is hard, very hard. We are here for you.
Quandry
JoinedPosts by Quandry
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49
told my parents to never ever tell me they love me again....
by oompa in...i told them in a very serious sitdown in their living room....said..."because if you cant show it then it does not count...that is not real love no matter who tells you it is....because it is how it makes me feel that determines if it is love....not if you just say it...and me and my sons do not feel that love at all now"....and i stayed calm and talked slowly and barely shed a tear as i held them back...and i had asked them to not say a word but just listen...dad said they would as long as it was not about religion as i knew he would.
this was two of the worst days of my life in a row..i told them the pain me and my boys feel from their shunning is worse than if they had died...that then i could grieve naturally and move on because that is normal....grief helps you cope...my grief is different because they choose to act like i am dead and normal grief does not seem to work on that.
i shared an epiphany with them i had about mens rules vs gods great idea of dna (but no i am not sure about a god anymore)it went kinda like this:.
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{Sigh}, I could use a hug...
by Billy the Ex-Bethelite inmy first two exams were this week.
things didn't go well.
the classes are tough -- math and science.
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Quandry
You can do it. You are doing it. Your goal is to have a degree....you must fight for it, and be determined not to give up. Usually there are math tutors available through the school for free. When I took college Algebra I went to tutoring in the college library right after class, and got help doing homework. Without that help I would not have been able to pass.
There is no doubt that it is hard and requires hard work...but it is less demanding than trying to wrap your head around the "generation" teaching or going out in service trying to explain things you were doubtful about yourself.
I am 59 and in college. I have six more classes after the two I'm taking now. I want to give up every day...but WILL have my degree....we can do it together!!!!!!
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Quandry
So very sorry to hear of your loss.
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Some JWs are exhibiting signs of violence because of WT hate speech. Read the threat to me and others posted at Topix yesterday
by AndersonsInfo inyesterday, i opened a topix account so i could post the information about watch tower representatives attending the political ocse meeting in poland for two weeks and the proof that they are an ngo.
one of the posters responded with these words: .
"barbs-info," eh?
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Quandry
The frustration level is rising.
They are stuck constantly defending the indefensible, and the only thing they are equipped to come back with is "It's all lies." This is, of course, the WTS party line and has been since the first accusation again CT Russell and his "miracle wheat."
It must be hard for them to see so many joining the ranks of those who have left the org. after really examining the facts presented.
Please take care.
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How many of you haven't fared too well since your exit?
by i_drank_the_wine ini know that i've had a hard time piecing things back together after losing my wife and family a couple years ago and haven't really gotten the ball rolling to say the least.
just curious to hear if anyone else is in the same boat, or was in the same boat and how long it took them to get a "new life" figured out and going..
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Quandry
For the first two years after my husband and I left, we were so hurt and dissillusioned that we literally hid in the house with the drapes shut. Hubbie would not go outside and mow the lawn without me being there, and we kept the cars in the garage and the doors down constantly so we could shut everything and everyone out.
I realized that I needed people and when a lovely woman at work invited me to a group of women that socialized but were members of a church I agreed to go. The ladies were so nice, and they discussed issues like mothers and children. However, after going a couple of times they were discussing relationships with God. I froze....I had no idea what my relationship with God was since leaving the WTS. I couldn't bring myself to go again.
I have begun to cultivate friendships with some of the women at work....nothing big, went with one to a movie over the summer, and have "gone out with the girls" once or twice after work. I highly recommend doing this...
I also recommend going back to school as it will make your self-esteem and sense of accomplishment higher. I am also in my last year of college...will graduate when I am sixty. If I can do it, you can too.
Give it the time it takes...but know that it does get better!!!
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The Watchtower slams the Catholics, why not Islam?
by punkofnice ingiven that the wbt$ is always ready to insult the catholics and other religions why don't they slam islam in the same way?.
is it because it's not considered 'christian' or do they know that muslims won't take their insults?.
or do they and i just missed it?.
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Quandry
I wonder if it is because they are afraid to take them on. They don't take kindly to any words they consider insulting-they might launch a Jihad against the WTS.
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My story...
by Silent_Scream init seems i pooped up out of nowhere.
i been following this site for a while.
couldn't resist it anymore..... was pretty much raised a jw.
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Quandry
Welcome to the forum.
As someone said: Better to have questions I can't answer than answers I can't question.
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New Song - "Blinded By New Light"
by RayPublisher inthe generation wasnt right (repeat).
the generation wasnt right (repeat).
the generation wasnt right (repeat).
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Quandry
Very clever!
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My trouble
by bushido8000 ini have been facing a small dilemma for some years now.
i have been in the truth since i was 5 years old.
after experiencing some troubles with man-made rules (non-scriptural, told me that i absolutely could not join my small school's football team) in the kingdom hall when i was about 16, i stopped going to take a step back and look at what was going on.
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Quandry
Just wanted to thank you, desirous of change. We can make a change, and we can make a difference! Go for it!
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A Letter to My Sons ... A Request for Help
by 00DAD init has now been over two years since i was df'd.
in that time i have had limited contact with my 17 year old son, the younger, and almost no contact with my 20 year old.
the older boy was baptized 5 years ago and sadly the younger just recently took the plunge into the "pool-aid".
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Quandry
My advice to you is to be careful crossing the street.
Don't write the letter just yet, as it may be intercepted by their mother, or if read, confirm to them that they are right in avoiding your company as an apostate.
How about this? Take stock of your goals now that you are out. Did you complete your education? Even if you are fifty you can go back to school and can personally vouch for its effectiveness, and urge your boys to get an education....you need to offer to pay for it, as their father, of course.
Next, perhaps you can volunteer for a really worthwhile organization and send your boys information, demonstrating that you are doing something cool for our planet. Being young, they may feel (as we all should) that to be involved is important-even if they can't due to being dubs.
Finally, send copies of pictures of you and them together doing something fun. Tell them how you love them, how proud you are of them, and that you think of them often. Before you sign your name, add the scripture, "Love never fails."
Facts usually send a JW running; emotion is deep inside of us all. Connect on this level. Other young men do things with their dad and I am sure that this will dig at them, hopefully encouraging them to have more of a relationship with you.
I guess one more thing I should mention. I assume you are still taking responsibility for their upbringing by sending money for things young men need-above the money demanded by courts. If not, you can expect bitterness that no letter could undo.
Wishing you success.