Posts by Quandry

74

new documentary film about Disfellowshipping - the anti - Knocking

by RubyParker in

my name is ruby parker.

i am 29 years old.

i was disfellowshipped when i was 16, i have completed a double major in anthropology and religion studies.

Quandry

Part of my argument is that those who are disfellowshipping experience a unique form of TRAUMA. It is not possible to lose your entire family, social network and worldview overnight and to then obtain closure or to “carry on” in my experience. The experience is carried with us - - it is not possible to compartmentalize our emotions and memories this way. Disfellowshippiing has a long term impact on an individual’s: emotions, self-worth, mental health, social skills, finances…the list goes on. The best these individuals can do, in my view, is to cope and continue to learn about our experience and those of others. If we had all “moved on” – none of us would have logged into this site in the first place.

You are quite right. My teen daughter was df'd after being spoken to in the most humiliating, demeaning way possible. She was called a liar after being accused of fornication for two and one half hours. She was made to read every condemning scripture in the Bible which five elders applied to her. When she would not admit to something she did not do, they made her read a scripture in Rev. that said God viewed her as filth and she would burn in the fire reserved for the devil and his angels.

Trauma? Oh, yes... for our whole family. Deep depression for two years for my husband, daughter, and I. The utter dissillutionment for our entire family to find out that "spiritual shepherds" cared so little for a child, and made her feel worthless and unloved even by God..

Her father and I would never dream of abandoning our child when she needed us most. Of course, we are now unofficially shunned also, for not "accepting what happened because God has allowed" it, as we were told.

Your work is very important. This is a story that needs to be told. Too many are unaware of the true results of this experience-especially for young impressionable people.

141

Are ex-JW still gullible or serpent-like?

by BEROEAN in

just wondering if ex-jws find it hard to trust others since their bad experience or are they still gullble souls?

just wondering because some of the stories i read about past experiences are off the charts!

some of you, your childhoods, your parents are seriously jacked up!

Quandry

I think we should all commend Beroean for attempting to answer our questions.....well, not all our questions. Is it just me, or does it seem to you that every time someone comes on this forum stating that they are a "progressive" elder, and tells us how good it is to be in the congregation, etc. they will NOT answer these questions?

Also, you neglected to answer my question about what the WTS would say about your "visits" here with us. What if you had to counsel a publisher about coming to internet sites? What would you say to him/her?

What is your answer, Beroean????

88

Friendly talk with a couple of elders

by TooBad TooSad in

last week i received a home visit from a couple of elders because they were concerned about my spirituality.

and lack of progress.

i said so you can guarantee the end will be here in 5 years.

Quandry

Welcome, Mazzie. Hope to hear more from you. Tell us your story when you are ready.

53

what was the strangest/worst counsel you recieved from elders ?

by flipper in

jw
friends

having been in the organization for 30 years, after i got out i reflected on this.

as a teenager i was told to not let my hair grow over my ears because i might stumble other young ones in the congregation.

also, in order to carry the microphones i was told i couldn't wear white socks, had to wear black or dark blue socks.

Quandry

That preteen boys should not be allowed to sleep over at each other's house because it might lead them to homosexual acts.

Yes, a wonderful spiritual shepherd at the KHall said, "Little girls sleepovers are lesbian training grounds."

What a moron......

28

Well this totally sucks...

by bluesbreaker59 in

jw
friends

my girlfriend that i brag to everyone about, and treat like a queen, is leaving me.

i actually got df'd over her, and have been with her for over 5 months.

we were so close, i just totally never, ever saw this coming.

Quandry

Tell her no more texts!! She needs to have the backbone to talk to you face to face about this.

Really. That is low. Perhaps she has done you a favor and you just can't see it yet. Give yourself some time. Five months is not alot of time to get to know someone. Maybe go a bit slower next time. What you really need is a companion who is a friend. A friend does not text someone such a message. I've been married over thirty years and will attest that the main thing is to be friends and enjoy one another's company.

28

It's Official

by done4good in

jw
friends

"this is to inform the congregation that done4good is no longer one of jehovah's witnesses".

that announcement was made last thursday after i sent my d/a letter in.

they boe wasted no time.

Quandry

I hope that you will be able to pursue some interests or hobbies that you never had time for before, or are able to go to school or volunteer to do some lasting good in your community.

29

DID YOU DEDICATE YOURSELF BEFORE BAPTISM OR DID YOU LIE?

by free2think in

i was just wondering when you where going through the questions for baptism did you know you had to dedicate yourself to jehovah before hand or did you lie?.

i didn't know i had to so when i went through the questions i had to lie and say i had.

i always felt bad about it afterwards and quickly did a little prayer that night.

Quandry

I was very sincere. I prayed,and dedicated myself and was willing to do whatever it took to serve God. I did not like service, but was willing. I did not like living with no money, and cleaning houses, but I was willing. I tried my level best to do everything that was asked of me. Be the smiling elder's wife, talk to new ones, take the car in service, book studies in the home, keep car and home clean, study for meetings, don't go on vacation because a. No money, b. One should not be away from service and the meetings.

Now, I am just exhausted thinking about everything. And the reward that I got for all the hard work? My teen daughter was treated like S^5$#T by five men who accused her of just about everything you can think of, told her that God viewed her as filth, and that she would burn in the lake of fire with the devil. Then told us "You should accept it because God has allowed it."

Now I am sincerely dissilutioned, and angry that for over thirty years I was serving a group of self-serving men.

141

Are ex-JW still gullible or serpent-like?

by BEROEAN in

just wondering if ex-jws find it hard to trust others since their bad experience or are they still gullble souls?

just wondering because some of the stories i read about past experiences are off the charts!

some of you, your childhoods, your parents are seriously jacked up!

Quandry

You said:

If it isn't found in the Bible, it goes against what God teaches.".

I guess more than anything, I would encourage everyone to ask questions.

Do you feel that the resurrection of the 144,000 began in 1919? Exactly where do you find that in the Bible? How about the new controversy over whether all the 144,000 were chosen by 1935 and all the new ones are replacements? Where exactly do you find that in the Bible? Are the 144,000 that are in heaven now "dispensing spiritual food" to ones on earth as has recently been suggested? Where do you find that in the Bible? If you do not agree with something are you really going to question these teachings of the "faithful slave?" How do you think you would be viewed? Have you tried this in the back room before?

Also, you neglected to answer my question about what the WTS would say about your "visits" here with us. What if you had to counsel a publisher about coming to internet sites? What would you say to him/her?

40

Memorial Partaker totals for 72 years by request!

by Atlantis in

question from researcher: the other day you posted the australian peak publishers and i was wondering if it would be possible to post the numbers of the "memorial partakers" from 1935 to 2006. that would be about 72 years of totals.. my answer: yes, we can do that for you but it will take a few hours to get everything together and scanned.

i will have to use different forms of wt literature to accomplish this.. unless indicated otherwise, numbers listed show partakers for previous year and some could show: "still incomplete" but they are still listed as a total nevertheless.

cheers!

Quandry

I noticed that the numbers did not steadily decline. Some years the numbers were significantly higher. How could this happen. Did some of the people have to go back and forth over the issue of whether or not they were annointed?

Or perhaps some years there were some really naughty annointed that had to be replaced.......

141

Are ex-JW still gullible or serpent-like?

by BEROEAN in

just wondering if ex-jws find it hard to trust others since their bad experience or are they still gullble souls?

just wondering because some of the stories i read about past experiences are off the charts!

some of you, your childhoods, your parents are seriously jacked up!

Quandry

As the study became more "enlightening" I took it seriously. I started appreciating who Jehovah is, His qualities, attributes, and His love. I culitivated a personal relationship with Him first and found like-minded individuals in the Org.

You post this but then state that you do not see yourself being led by the nose by the Org.

Well, there were different types of people in the KHall when I went. My family, however, were the ones who were sincere. We did not put our own interests first. We took as gospel all the WTS writings in every publication. We did NOT go to churches for any reason. We did NOT stay home from field service. We tried diligently to do ALL that was asked of us. We always went when the CO came, and gave money till it hurt.

Why is that so unusual? Why do you make out ones who actually did all the things expected as the gullible ones? Don't you realize that the WTS says that anything else is less than whole-souled service and could lead to death at the big A? You describe yourself as one who my elder husband would have looked on as a less than desirable publisher in the congregation. One that bent the rules that were not meant to be bent in any way.

It sounds to me like you want to have things YOUR OWN WAY instead of the way directed by the WTS but think that according to their rules, you are OK. You are not. Why not tell them you won't be led by the nose, but instead you will come to sites on the internet such as this one. Then we'll see whose rules you will play by.