Posts by LisaRose

13

The longest minute?

by Simon in

jw
friends

which is longer, a treadmill minute or a microwave minute?.

... or every minute of every thursday meeting when you wanted to get back home in time to see red dwarf and some elder who loved the sound of his own voice had the mic..

Emo Philips
What is eternity? You're on the checkout line at a supermarket. There are seven people in front of you. They are all old. They all have two carts and coupons for every item. They are all paying by check. None of them have ID. It's the checkout girl's first day on the job. She doesn't speak any English. Take away fifteen minutes from that, and you begin to get an idea of what eternity is.

25

Soooo, when I tell you I feel it's a cult

by cognac in

jw
friends

why would you proceed to invite me to their meetings?

wtf?

how much clearer can i make my stance????

LisaRose

cultBgone
I wonder, if when someone they know to be a "good" person decides to leave -- not because they've been offended/stumbled, or had an affair, or started smoking, or wanted to become a wealthy ceo -- what does that do to a still-in jdub's thinking process?

It stops their thinking process cold. Due to cognitive dissonance they cannot believe that anyone would leave for any reason other than bad conduct. That's why they get the deer in the headlights look, their brain cannot take in the idea that someone would leave because they just plain don't believe it. They usually conclude you were lying or didn't mean what you said. That's why they invited Cognac to the meeting, they cannot believe that she meant what she said, as they can't put her in the "evil apostate" category, therefore she is must be just mistaken, therefore going to the meetings will fix it.
I have told JWs that came to my door that I am an apostate, but because I smile and am polite they seem to just ignore that, they just don't believe me.

7

Has anyone here run for a political office now that they are out of Jws ?

by troubled mind in

jw
friends

i am thinking of running for alderman on my city council .

the mayor had a meeting with me yesterday and is anxious to replace the alderman in my ward .

she liked what i had to say at a council meeting a few weeks ago during public comments .

LisaRose

Um, does being president of my HOA count? Just joking, but if that interests you, why not?

I live in a small town and we had some shenanigans going on that convinced me that you do need to be involved and it does make a difference. A city councilman was instrumental in having the city start a low income housing project using state redevelopment money plus their own money. The only problem was he owned the company that was going to get the contract to manage it, he claimed it was owned by his daughters, who were college students. He got sick (since passed away) and then things really went haywire, the recession hit, redevelopment money dried up and the city couldn't even finish the project. It sat for six years, a blight and a monument to greed, it's only now getting completed.

So if you think you can do some good, why not go for it?

15

Missing Friends.

by Resi in

it's been a long time since i posted.

for a brief recap, i have an aunt who is one of jehovah's witnesses.

when i was really sick, i sought out their group because i remembered the support my aunt had and how they were like a second family to her.

LisaRose

I am sorry you were treated that way, it was very hurtful. Although it's good you never got dunked, what kind of a stupid, f'ed up religion wouldn't let you get baptized because you were sick and missed some meetings? Most religions would have been happy to have you, they wouldn't criticize you for being sick, they would bring you soup. They shoot themselves in the foot by being so stupid, it's no wonder why they are having money troubles.

I know it's hard right now, but you are young and will meet new people and the pain of being treated as disposable will fade with time. I have been out so long I hardly think about it anymore, I've made and lost friends since then and made new friends again, that's life and there are a lot of great people in the world, just keep looking until you find them.

22

Does it ever just hit you...It all may be a dream

by LevelThePlayingField in

that the paradise may or may not be real?

that the things you have been taught for many years from the jehovah's witnesses may not really be as they say?

has it really ever really hit you with that "pow" of reality ever?

LisaRose

Realizing that everything I believed in was a lie was very difficult. My faith was like a security blanket that helped me deal with the ills of the world, I didn't need to worry because God would take care of everything. Losing my faith was a shock, like someone had abruptly ripped away my security blanket, leaving me in the cold. It felt very uncomfortable. Eventually I came to terms with it and moved on in my life, but it was a process, like grieving when you love someone you love.

The stages of grief:

Denial. This all can not be a lie! I can't have been fooled that much.

Anger: I have been lied to! I was manipulated!

Bargaining: Maybe if I just pray more God will help me understand things.

depression: There is no one true religion, it's hopeless.

Acceptance: life can be hard, but there are good things in my life and I can deal with it the bad things.

8

I may have to go back!!

by Crazyguy in

maybe i'm over reacting but i'm getting tired of all the bullshit.

they truly see you as a demonized one when your gone.

i spoke to my 14 year old about not getting baptized he said he wasn't and understood my reasoning then texts his mother and says some really hurtful stuff.

LisaRose

Fourteen is a tough age, it's natural for them to reject everything you say no matter what that is, so don't take it personally.Even If you and his mom were both hardcore dubs the odds are pretty good that he will eventually leave anyway, if he knows that you will support him no matter what he chooses to do, then you are stacking the odds even more.

21

Please could you give me your opinions on this statement? . . .

by Miss Worldly in

jw
friends

'i have prayed, and confessed my sins to my god, i'm not telling them (the elders) anything'.

.. could this be a significant sign that there maybe a small dent in the armour of an active jw?

or is it just a case of 'keep your nose out' ?

LisaRose

I find even true hard core believers will hide things, they sort of rationalize the behavior in their mind, it doesn't mean they are having doubts. People are blind when it comes to their own issues,while still being judgemental when it comes to others.

The society even gives tacit approval for it if you are an elder. They have said if the past misdeeds was a while back and the elder is still serving faithfully it's a sign that Jehovah has forgiven him. We have all heard of elders that had long term affairs, cheated in business for years, etc. When caught they usually take the punishment and get reinstated. And they were in on judicial committees the whole time, passing judgement while engaging in worse behaviours of the own. They are just hypocrites.

73

CO in midwest gets pink-slipped

by LevelThePlayingField in

i saw the coordinator heading for the stage and hit record on my ipad.

i was shocked but here it is.

here's my typed transcript of the letter he read:.

LisaRose

I agree Dozy, I do not think the higher ups approved the letter. Reading between the lines, it appears that they were shocked and are still trying to deal with it. They are trying to believe that it will all work out and all this is God's will, but it probably doesn't feel like that right now.

This is not really how things worked before, or at least not how they understood it, they probably assumed they would do this work until they retired and they would be taken care of. It's really rough to have to start over at that age, they went from JW royalty to average Joe in a month and have to earn a living and worry about retirement. I almost feel sorry for them.

12

Astral Projection

by Black Man in

jw
friends

so what are your thoughts on astral projection?

have a co-worker who claims to know how to induce this on himself.

is he crazy?

LisaRose

I agree stuff, its just a form of meditation/self hypnosis. It's just your body releasing endorphins, the feel good hormones, it's well known that meditation can do that. I have been using a guided meditation for healing, it creates a pleasant feeling, like you are floating a bit, the music and the person talking are designed to put you in a relaxed state, at one point they say to imagine your head is floating, and it does sort of feel like that. For it to work you have to be very relaxed about the experience, trust that it will work and it helps if you have experience with meditation.

People try to "dress it up" with names like astral projection, which makes it sound like there us something mysterious going on, but meditation has proven benefits, so there is some science behind it, but for most ex JWs I would recommend starting with just plain meditation, then moving on to guided meditations, self hypnosis, etc, if that interests you.

104

Farewell

by EdenOne in

"don't be dismayed by good-byes.

a farewell is necessary before you can meet again.

and meeting again, after moments or lifetimes, is certain for those who are friends.

LisaRose

I am sorry you feel you had to leave over the comments of a poster. In any community of people you will always find a variety of people with a variety of ideas and manners. Getting upset because someone was rude is understandable, but demanding apologies and insisting that others be banned for them is just setting yourself up for disappointment.

I used to get upset when people made personal attacks, or misconstrued my words, or disagreed with me, and of course it hurt my feelings. But I found responding defensively just started a negative back and forth that just never ended. I finally realized that It's entirely possible to just ignore comments and not respond in any way. Really, not only can you, but it's best. Often bullies are looking for that response, it's the payoff for them, so refusing to engage is the worst thing you can do to the. So what if they insulted you? Take the long view and be the better person and refuse to respond in kind, or even respond at all.

If anything I feel sorry for anyone who needs to act in that way, as it tells me they are not happy in their life. It's just words in the ether, not meaningful in my life to any way, really. In our previous life as Jehovah's Witnesses there was unity and firm rules, but that unity was at the cost of intellectual freedom and choice. I treasure the right to disagree, to say something is bunk when I think it is, to defend my view point. I would not want to be on a forum that was so heavily moderated as to eliminate all controversy. I also see that many here have made personal attacks on Viv that are worse that her original rudeness, imho. I personally feel that she bothers people so much because she is most often right, but it's easier to get upset with her rudeness that counter her logic.

But of course you can choose to go, if negative comments bother you that much it's probably best. Being an Ex JW is hard enough, you don't need to add any more stress. But I think we are a better community if we have a variety of viewpoints, so I would wish for you to stay, ignore the negativity and continue to contribute your unique opinions. In any case I wish you well and hope the decision brings you peace.