Truthseeker I'm in a similar situation. My wife & I have been married for almost two decades and have two kids. Since I stopped serving as an elder a few months ago we've had a couple of brief separations, and when we are together it is a stressful time around the house. I've come to realize my wife just isn't going to "get it" until she is ready, and unfortunately that might never happen. Like your wife, no matter what I say or show her she says this is Jah's Org and the imperfect men running things are doing the best they can. She even admits I'm right about some things, but says I think too much of myself and don't want to wait on Jah, etc...I'm sure you know the argument. I don't really have any advice, I wish I did, because I'd sure use it in my situation. I hope things get better for you.
doinmypart
JoinedPosts by doinmypart
-
39
Not talking about JW stuff has the opposite effect - regression phase
by truthseeker ini decided to take the advice of some of you here when i wrote about my situation.. i am married, but my wife is a die hard witness.
despite me showing her mountains of evidence and her actually accepting it, she is regressing back into jw think.. this has happened since i stopped mentioning anything anti-jw.. now she thinks that my problems with jw's were just a phase because i am not bringing up the issue anymore.. i really want to leave this religion, but i can't do that without losing her.. many here i know are trapped and some are still serving as elders.
i don't know how you do it, but i guess routine is routine.
-
-
-
76
Keep ears and eyes open: Possible announcement this Wednesday
by truthseeker inno hype - no rumor please.. anyone who still goes to the hall might hear something during the announcements.
i will be going myself and will be sure to report back what is said, if anything.. from channelc.. .
http://www.channelc.org/cgi-bin/eboard30/index.cgi.
-
-
doinmypart
I have relatives that will be attending the Annual Meeting. If anything of import is mentioned I'll find out and post it back to the board.
-
20
Disfellowship Removal
by easyshi ini am not a jw but my wife was raised as one.
we were married about 14 months ago and she wants to re-join the organization in a different location from the disfellowing location.
i believed she was kicked out 14 years ago for comitting adultery to get out of a bad marriage (her story).
-
-
doinmypart
We have known each other for over 5 years and I'm sure we broke many JW rules in the process.
If you broke the rules by engaging in what they term "Porneia, loose conduct, or uncleanness" before you were married, the jc will probably grill her on that. They will ask a lot of intimate questions and want details. It doesn't matter that she was DF while engaging in this activity, they will use it along with the information for which she was disfellowshipped.
I'm not kidding or exaggerating. They love to ask questions of that nature. As a non-JW you may not be allowed in the room with her while the questioning is taking place, again, depends on the elders.
-
10
Did they get rid of disfellowshipping? What?
by bluesapphire ini need to know asap.
anyone have the scoop?
-
-
doinmypart
There are some elders posting here, hopefully we'll hear something soon. Perhaps this could be the rumor mill running overtime or it could be the Big Announcenment, perhaps.
It would surprise me if the WTS made a move to loosening it's control by tampering with the DF process. It is just too good of a way to keep the R&F in line. But I suppose it could happen.
-
22
How do they determine who is inactive?
by I.Wonder ini am still "in" the org (technically) and i have never got the same answer twice.
i have been told that if you don't report time for one month then your considered inactive for six months.
i have also been told that if you don't report for six months then your inactive.
-
-
doinmypart
CalamityJane at the elders' school Fall/Winter 2005, the WTS Representative-Instructor made it clear that an Inactive publisher is still considered a JW and elders should do what they can to assist...assign to Pioneer assist others program, shepherding calls, etc.
The HLC won't help a DF person, or one who is not an unbaptized publisher. Any other situation, like the one you described, is probably up to the discretion of the local HLC.
-
17
Going "Door to Door"..........
by whyamihere inwhen i was a teen going door to door, my "territory" was always the college area.
my choosing because i loved going back to the places i was the night before.
think of it - the last time they seen me i was either doing a beer bong or teaching people to do a beer shot gun.
-
-
doinmypart
When I believed in it and pioneered, I liked the rural territory. My wife & I had a large 4x4 vehicle, like Jourles mentioned. We'd have other couples join us and we had a good time driving in crazy places, laughing & talking. The houses were few & far between, and the people were more open to conversation. Even when I was full-fledged dub I enjoyed just talking to people about stuff, getting to know the person, y'know? Rural territory had a lot of older people that had a lot to say and I always enjoyed listening.
-
26
Did your JW social life only consist of meals at a friends home?
by truthseeker ini know many here who have had good and bad jw social experiences.
some went camping, hiking etc, went to the beach.
some had no social life at all in the org and some had congregations where nothing ever happened socially.. i know of one sister, who has since left, who complained that the only thing witnesses did when they got together, was share a meal.. now, there's nothing wrong with sharing a meal.
-
-
doinmypart
At my old KH, and a number of KHs in the circuit, there were a lot of playing basketball on Friday evening, cards on Saturday evenings, and grilling at someone's house on Sunday afternoons. Every so often a CO will come around discouraging the card playing and grilling since alcoholic beverages and large groups were involved, but this never slowed it down. People down in the south love playing cards.
Skate parties took place once every two months and kids from all over the circuit and neighboring circuit would attend. And during the summer volleyball at the park, or rafting the river took place a couple of times a year.
In all there were activities to do, it just had to be limited to JWs. And many of the older JWs wouldn't agree with all of the get-togethers. The older elders and pioneers would complain to the CO, but like I mentioned earlier nothing ever changed.
-
12
How long were you baptized?
by Alligator Wisdom inand for all of you that made your way out?.
18 years this past summer.. alligator wisdom (aka brother not exerting vigorously by wts standards).
[sorry if this topic was posted before.
-
-
doinmypart
Raised in it. Baptized 21 years.
-
10
Did they get rid of disfellowshipping? What?
by bluesapphire ini need to know asap.
anyone have the scoop?
-
-
doinmypart
As Effervescent mentioned the announcement was changed. When a person is DF or DA the announcement is simply "________ is no longer a JW."
I was an elder until a couple of weeks ago and there wasn't anything new as of that time. Don't know about since then.
-
20
Disfellowship Removal
by easyshi ini am not a jw but my wife was raised as one.
we were married about 14 months ago and she wants to re-join the organization in a different location from the disfellowing location.
i believed she was kicked out 14 years ago for comitting adultery to get out of a bad marriage (her story).
-
-
doinmypart
Welcome easyhi.
You and your wife have a long road ahead of you. Here's what might happen:
The elders in her former congregation will be in contact with the elders in the new congregation she wants to attend. They will share all of the details of her "sin." A new judicial committee (jc) will be formed in the new congregation, the jc will meet with her every few months monitoring her progress. She will have to attend all meetings, sit at the back of the kingdom hall, be ignored by everyone for anywhere from six months to a couple of years depending on the elders on the jc. If her ex-husband did not want to end the marriage and was agreeable to forgiving her and staying in it, then she will probably have to wait longer to be re-instated. Do whatever you can to dissuade her from re-instating. It won't be good for either of you in the long run.