Posts by OnTheWayOut

32

DA myself to relieve great pressure?

by Isambard Crater in

jw
friends

my lifelong mental illnesses, fuelled significantly by the borg, are very bad at the moment and result in me missing lots of midweek meetings, but i haven't missed a sunday in years except the occasional vacation.. the nature of my mental and emotional illnesses mean that i, as a physically in and mentally out pimo, take to heart very painfully admonishment from the platform to never miss meetings, preach all i can, and so on.. okay, i report 3 hours each month on average and no elder has ever said anything, but when they make comments on the platform, i feel such great guilt and shame, but also anger, as they do not understand my illnesses and when i do mention my situation to elders, they kind of minimise and joke about it.. some other sisters in my congregation started "officially" not attending midweek meetings a few year's ago because of their own health circumstances, but i know for a fact that some elders look down on them for this reason, not showing real understanding deep down even if they do on the surface.. i have reached the point where i want to hand in a da letter as a cry for help, or more like a clear indicator to them that when i say i'm not well enough to attend midweek, i really mean it and it's not just an excuse.

sure, i'm only 42, but i can still be too fragile to go out at night with a 30 minute drive both ways..

OnTheWayOut

Isambard Crater
I already realised it's not the truth in 2014 and have been stumbling on for family reasons only since then.

I would assume that it would be easier with family that you are not DA/DF'ed.

steve2
It looks like at a very profound level, you are longing for the elders to "get" what you are going through and to say to you: "We understand; we'll go easy on you. How can we help?"

Wouldn't it be so healing for you if they did say that!

Isambard Crater
I guess I will console myself knowing that I'm aware of four other Sisters, one who is an elder's wife, who haven't attended a Midweek meeting for over 3 years.

Truly, the elders only have the power we give them. Go back to page 2 and read Steve2's answer again. Regardless of whether you DA or not, I would suggest that you focus on how the elders are unskilled at anything psychological or concerning actual counsel and only know "DO MORE (Meetings, Prayer, Recruiting, Volunteering for the organization, donating money, personal study)!!!"

If the decision (for family reasons) were to not DA, I would learn to tell the elders off in the firmest way to push them away- "I am fine, I will call you if I need you. Apparently, a man is still spiritually qualified if his wife misses all the midweek meetings, so perhaps I am still spiritual enough. And since you seem to disagree with me, I will not be used for any meeting parts at all."

Personal counseling would be great. For their own reasons, typically financial, many never get that. I hope you do.

38

Who is benefiting from Watchtower Corporation financially

by John Davis in

who do you believe is financially benefiting from watchtower business dealings.

i know about the gold apple watch, but that is only a small percentage of the billions that they have.

so who do you think is keeping all of this money.

OnTheWayOut

The Governing Body and many important-feeling upper level Watchtower men, just like all the full-time servants, were lower middle level pioneers or others who slaved for not much personal gain (if any).

So they worked their way to the top. They had a choice to accept the green handshakes, first class travel, hotels, restaurants while traveling, a slightly better apartment while not traveling- which is changed now that they have built new quarters that include more of the higher end luxuries than Brooklyn had.

But in all the history, the same people of power who accept SOME benefits, because it was a huge step up from slaving, have steered money to JW businesses. There were paper, ink, technology, furniture, construction corporations. There were plenty of lawyers and accountants and realtors.

So the trade off for the people getting money was that they had to kiss the asses of the Governing Body and/or others that steer the money toward them.

28

Have You Ever Found Yourself Really Not Liking Someone Here?

by minimus in

jw
friends

i've been on this board for years.

99% of the posters here i do not personally know.

a few, maybe not so much...lol..... do posters here get you upset to the point that you really don't like them?

OnTheWayOut

OMFG, there have been so many......(well, to be fair, one person was several of them).
I don't pick too many fights these days with those that are pushing their own agendas, but I have in the past. Most of the ridiculous ones have been banned and if they came back, they have been low key.

30

"...You will be Disfellowshipped for 7 years"

by HereIgo in

shortly before i left the "troof" a co had given a talk during his visit.

at the time there was a scandal going on in the congregation where 2 couples basically swapped spouses with each other.

it was quite the scandal.

OnTheWayOut

Half banana: Now don't get me wrong, I'm all in favour of wife swapping...

If everyone is on-board, no harm no foul, eh?

30

"...You will be Disfellowshipped for 7 years"

by HereIgo in

shortly before i left the "troof" a co had given a talk during his visit.

at the time there was a scandal going on in the congregation where 2 couples basically swapped spouses with each other.

it was quite the scandal.

OnTheWayOut

The 7 years is a minimum that comes from the cult leaders, not the C.O.. they really are not supposed to say the number, but just mention "a long time" because the sinner definitely knew better and might just be scheming to have his/her divorce and a short DF then reinstatement.

23

Should a JW accept Veteran payments?

by Tantalon in

hello people,.

i was born in but long time faded.

i think i hold current jws to a higher standard than they now maintain.. here's the thing; my father is very old, in his nineties and been a jdub for over 60 years and even made it to elder till he got too old.on a recent visit my siblings and dad were saying how wonderful that veterans affairs were.

OnTheWayOut

"No part of the world" has nothing to do with the person being "of the world" before becoming a JW.

I get what you are asking, not so much about the person receiving needed benefits that he earned, but more about not even considering walking away from it and even being a bit proud of his service.

It's a tough juggling act, this cognitive dissonance. I am sure it has crossed many veterans' minds when they became JW's.

I am one of them. But I didn't get shot at or hurt in the military. I have no real benefits coming beyond the NOTHING DOWN mortgage and I would qualify for medical benefits if I didn't earn much money. All I can say is that were I still a believer, I would take what I deserved and be "quiet" about it to other JW's so as not to "stumble" them.

41

Where do I go now?

by Libby in

jw
friends

so i thought my purpose was to serve jehovah and get baptised.

where do i go now to get baptised?

is baptism even a requirement for serving god or was that just for the disciples and people of that time.

OnTheWayOut

I could go on to tell you to start with assuming nothing, questioning everything, doubting most everything.

But instead, I will appeal to common sense. If God saw your struggle with JW's and discovering that "the truth" was a lie, and if He knows how faithful you wish to be in finding the way, He won't be angry if you take your time.

Relax a bit, search. Start a journey of discovery. Include skepticism of the Bible and include science. Include philosophy and alternatives to Christianity. Do some heavy research on cognitive dissonance and cults. Enjoy finding out what the real truth is. If God is worthy of your worship, He won't smite you for wanting to find the real truth.

22

As an Ex JW now, how would you react if you met your Bible study conductor?

by EverApostate in

i was a jw for 11 years , came to know ttatt and wrote my disassociation letter 5 years ago.

since then i had been an atheist and trying all i can to spread awareness for “still in” members.

my wife and mom are still jws and i do get along with them perfectly.

OnTheWayOut

I wouldn't bother to try to rock his boat, but if I thought it could-
"They DID say the world was going to end in 1975 and various points before that. They DID say it certainly would end in the 20th century and CERTAINLY before the 1914 generation passed away. You were WRONG WRONG WRONG."

30

Coffee Mugs

by Iamallcool in

jw
friends

i am thinking about buying coffee mug(s).

maybe i will get my coffee mug personalized.

any suggestions on what should be on my coffee mug?

OnTheWayOut

10

A "Simple Life": Who's Footing the Bill?

by thebrokenkite in

after much lurking and even sporadic posting under an alias account, i've decided to come out of the "apostate" shadows.

this month marks my 1-year disfellowshipping anniversary.

it's been a long, arduous journey, one that nearly took my life.

OnTheWayOut

This topic has been discussed, but I don't think any recent discussions have been had because the huge push for everyone to pioneer was years ago. Now, there are so many laid off Bethelites and plenty of older pioneers to stand around the carts and do nothing.

But in my day, there were so many pioneers that made sure they did not work enough hours to lose their government benefits. So many who said they could not work, but then did the all-day-everyday recruitment work. Praise was heaped upon them for this. When some would quit the pioneer work to go to work full time, they would have elders and C.O.'s accusing them of setting worldly goals and losing out on holy spirit.

Thanks for the reminders.