Hey, the same thing happened to me. I was focusing on the learning of the language and I didn't keep getting the cult "language" down my throat.
Thanks for sharing such a story.
OnTheWayOut
JoinedPosts by OnTheWayOut
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Foreign Language Field and Fading
by NoviceLocs14 inhey guys.
first of all, i want to thank everyone for being so welcoming and helpful on this forum.... i was thinking about my last 3 years as a jw when i was attending the portuguese congregation and learning that language to bring in more converts.
interestingly, we were told not to attend meetings in our native language in order to immerse ourselves in the new language.
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OnTheWayOut
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Creation account is the creation of Moses
by venus inthe word `intelligence' [from inter, “between” + legere, “ to read”] would mean ‘discern things as though reading in between the lines.
now read in between the lines of what moses wrote; his favored and frequent statement is this: ‘obedience to god means blessings, and disobedience means maledictions.’ (deut 28:1-68; 30:15-18) let us try to discern his motive behind this statement.. .
when moses wanted to present 10 commandments and other laws, he naturally wanted to prepare the israelites with a mind-set that ‘we must obey god, otherwise it is problem for us.’ the best way for this was to modify a well-known story of fall from other cultures.
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OnTheWayOut
I hope one day that people all realize that the Jews were not slaves in Egypt and there was no exodus with or without the 40 years wandering on a trip that should have taken just days.
Whoever finally wrote the creation account also wrote the Moses account, both from stories used to sway the people into believing they are a special people.
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My parents found out
by BlackWolf inso in my last post i talked about how i had told my younger siblings how i didn't plan to get baptized or ever be a witness.
i thought i could trust them but i guess i was wrong, they're just kids after all.
my oldest brother (who's 11) told on me today.
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OnTheWayOut
I'm going to guess that "faking" is your term, that they just said to do the JW stuff and maybe be quiet about your thoughts.
Do whatever it takes to get your education and have a normal life. Keep us posted.
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What did NOT get you out?
by problemaddict 2 ini realize this is odd, but a "how you woke up" thread and the personal stories that are told which i know we all enjoy, made me think of this.
in helping my wife and a couple others get the ball rolling, i realized the thing that resonated with me, didn't even move the needle with them.
i wanted to rail on and on about blood, because that was my conduit to waking up, but for my wife it was about shunning.
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OnTheWayOut
Allowing of blood fractions did not get me out. Their baffling bullshit was enough to get me to think that medical advances had come far enough that we were able to get the thing we needed without violating God's laws.
Birthdays and holidays did not get me out.
The "deficit at this point" announced at the Circuit Assemblies, despite my just having been to the business meeting with the elders and knowing our funds were okay, did not get me out.Shoddy overpriced quick-build Kingdom Halls did not get me out.
I saw all that clearer later, but I saw it while I was in, and it didn't really get to me.
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I Give Up!
by pale.emperor inim giving up guys.
i've reached the end of my patience and now i finally refuse to waste any more time on part-time witnesses.
i've text all of my active jw family members and told them to delete my number from their phone and never contact me again.
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OnTheWayOut
So sorry to hear of your family woes. Yeah, I did try a little bit at one time to help family, but had to back off and find neutral ground in order to maintain relations. Short of that, I might have just cut them all off same as you. Good luck with that.
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How did you overcome feelings of lost time in the Org?
by Skepsis ini'm a very positive person who always try to focus on the good side of things.. however, my fading is becoming increasingly painful and i'm starting being shunned by some i thought were friends.
i'm missing some meetings so the rumour is spreading to neighbouring congregations where i'm known that i'm not as spiritual as i used to be.
elders want to have a shepherding meeting with me.
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OnTheWayOut
I can't speak on the job issue for you. I had a decent job that I love and still have that.
I faded for the sake of my mother and my in-law family. Well, that part went okay.
On the friend issue, similarly people I thought would want to at least stay in contact were ready to drop me. So I dealt with that by fading faster. I don't need fake friends or cold shoulders. Better to be alone.And I slowly built up friendships with other ex-JW's by meeting them.
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What Did You Imagine Jehovah To Look Like?
by pale.emperor inwhat did you imagine jehovah to look like?
i always pictured him like this:.
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Dealing with Loneliness and Social Anxiety
by NoviceLocs14 inhello, this is my 1st initiated post on this site, so i'm a bit nervous.
i did search for similar topics on this site, but a lot of them have been inactive for several years, so here goes.... a little background, i was pretty much born in "da twoof", baptized at 17, pioneered for about 6 years, was part of the rbc part time, and was even in the foreign language field for the last 3 years i was a jw.
so i pretty much had a pretty active social life within the organization due to being part of all of those things.
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OnTheWayOut
I don't know where you live, but I do know that in these United States and in other places, there are wonderful groups of ex-JW's that meet semi-regularly or occasionally. Let me briefly tell you why that has been my way of finding people to hang out with, be tight with.
I am an alcoholic. But I stopped drinking for "Jehovah" back in 1988. When I came outta the religion, I fell off the wagon a little bit. Still, I don't relate to the people at Alcoholics Anonymous. They focus on that avoiding drinking thing being the Number 1 aspect of their lives. But hey, I got back on the wagon and that is not my Number 1 problem. Yet my coworkers are heavy social drinkers- not necessarily problem drinkers, but I still feel a wee bit uncomfortable around them.
If I found a group of hobbyists or enthusiasts who share an interest, that would be fine. But I knew for the first several years out of that religion that I felt awkward around people when discussing my philosophies and what I have been doing. Some ex-JW's can do it well, others cannot.But I found other ex-JW's through meetupdotcom and I found friends on this forum. I have been traveling to Tahoe every July to meet up with the group that does a weekend in the woods. Others here get me, I get them. No deep explanations are necessary, but long discussions are welcome.
I am sure there are endless numbers of songs that can summarize how we are all milling about in close proximity to each other and feeling all alone at the same time. We ought to get together.
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Physically In, Mentally Out
by James Jack in7 years ago i was this "ultra spiritual elder".
you name it, i was visible all over the region.
i was the coordinator, on the convention committee, rbc, had a talk at every convention and assembly, regular pioneer, etc.
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OnTheWayOut
I was a physically in, mentally out elder. First thing I did was resign as an elder. If I was going to fade for family's sake, I had to get rid of that hindrance. Well, they did that for you.
Others have mentioned apologizing, getting things right with your son. Do that if you have not. Never let this religion be the cause of family divisions.
As for the rest of your "spiritual journey," I believe that each person must find their own way. See where your reading selection and movies and videos take you.
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What woke you up?
by MrRoboto infor me, i think it was just the right time as i was starting to wake up on other fronts as well (anyone who had went through these will know what i mean).
but it started when i was looking for what info goes on a publisher card, which led to me reading one person's story (ex bethelite) which was pretty crazy to an all-in jw but who trusts those apostates...?.
then i started watching videos on cults, as if my subconscious was trying to tell my concord mind something... when i saw a particular one about a young man in lds getting ready to start their 2 year preaching campaign, including a school, social activities etc, i realized that i couldn't tell the difference between the folks of this mormon cult and the jws (save for some religious differences) .
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OnTheWayOut
I was fully "in" - a real company man who would support the organization, with one huge exception: when I was appointed elder, I saw the way elders did so much to keep their families out of trouble. I decided to apply that to everyone. I did my best to get people out of trouble. I squashed investigations by telling members things like, "If you just deny this accusation, we have no reason to form a judicial committee." I told members that if they straightened things out with Jehovah, they did not need to tell the elders everything.
I developed a skill at finding things on my Watchtower Library and that worked its way into being good finding things on "Google" and its predecessors. A series of events that really caused me to see the double standards more clearly- such as how elders could be "guilty" of things that would simply be overlooked where anyone else must undergo a JC and some kind of "discipline" - made me ask myself why I don't simply Google "Jehovah's Witnesses" and go wherever it takes me.So I did that and immediately felt relieved that it wasn't just me that had problems and I felt depressed at the same time about all the years I wasted. I started a quick fade. Here I am.
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