OnTheWayOut

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Posts by OnTheWayOut

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  24

  JW at a thrift store....

  by Muddy Waters in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  so i was recently in a thrift store, looking through some of the stuff there, when another aisle over, somebody sneezed.. (as far as i know, nobody lost a meatball.... 😅🙃 ...).

  anyway, somebody sneezed.

  and somebody immediately said, “bless you!”.

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  OnTheWayOut

  When people said "Bless you" or "Happy holiday" or any such stuff, I generally said "Thank you."
  
  Ridiculous to display contempt for good intentions.
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  9

  The Fading Loop Hole

  by new boy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  my father in law (robert stillman) killed himself in 1993. after the "new light" came out in 1981 we could no longer have limited contact with dis-fellowedshipped persons.

  after years of being shunned by his only family he blow his brains out with a 38 special.

  at the time of his death, the only thing bob was doing that wasn’t in line with the society’s rules and regulations was smoking.

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  OnTheWayOut

  Fading away is a loop hole, but it has its problems.
  
  
  
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  79

  Ending Bible Study

  by Maria Nieves in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i have been studying with jehovah's witnesses for approximately two years.

  initially, i liked the studies and felt that i was growing closer to god.

  however, as the studies progressed, they seemed to become increasingly negative and i did not like what i was being taught.

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  OnTheWayOut

  I have skimmed 7 pages. Maria, it sounds like you hope to keep JW's as friends, particularly your study conductor.
  
  First of all, she hasn't gone out of her way FOR YOU. She did it for the organization- to count her time and buy her way into paradise. But that doesn't mean she doesn't care about you.
  
  Instead of attempting to address your particular issue, I will highlight my own to make the point. I was an elder, I was well-liked. I did not sin to get kicked out, I drifted away (to make that long story short).
  
  All the JW's did not have to shun me, and they don't really shun me. But they don't call, they don't check on me. If I am not with them, then they have no need for me. I used to have people tell my wife they miss me. My answer was "Then lets do lunch." Never had a reply because "we miss you" means "Get back to the Kingdom Hall."
  
  My in-laws and my mother, my wife's best friend and her husband- they treat me with respect and are okay with me. They have managed to put aside a JW unwritten rule to have nothing to do with me. I respect them for that.
  
  As for the rest of them, in my case I say good riddance. My own best friend has nothing to do with me. I made new friends and got closer to non-JW family. The important part is my own mental health.
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  22

  Is The Watchtower Society Just Copying The Mormon's Model?

  by pale.emperor in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  when i was a faithful jw i was pretty much obsessed with the mormon religion.

  to me it was like lord of the rings.

  i knew the characters, the history, the events, the joseph smith stories, the religion's history etc etc etc and i long suspected even then that the watchtower society has been copying certain things from the lds church.. for example, the first thing i noticed was when the book study was dropped and family worship was started.

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  OnTheWayOut

  Watchtower wishes it could achieve what LDS has achieved- whacky cult accepted into the mainstream, tithing, and members who are rich and in politics.

  A cult is a cult is a cult. Many similarities. I could compare them to Scientology and many things would be similar, mostly having to do with ex-members and having to reach higher levels to learn other secrets of the cult.
  
  But each has their particular strain of whackof- with Watchtower it's Armageddon around the next corner, blood transfusions, keeping out of the military and politics.
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  56

  Will You Stop Listening To Michael Jackson’s Music?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  since the hbo documentary, more people are condemning mj.

  will these child abuse allegations affect you if you ever liked his music?.

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  OnTheWayOut

  I didn't see the documentary, but I saw a clip of one alleged victim who said that he didn't understand that what Michael did was child molestation at the time.
  MJ was alive to defend charges, paid some people off and they left happy. So it's a mixed bag.
  
  Personally, I find it hard to imagine that counselors or some kind of professionals could not discover what actually happened back then. It tends to make me believe that money made everyone happy. But the money is gone now and MJ cannot defend himself. Along comes the documentary people.
  
  If you were happy with the money at the time, then you are not really a victim- regardless of what MJ did. Or you are a victim of your parents accepting that the money was enough. Go get therapy and let the dead rest.
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  89

  Babies Who Are Not Dead From An Abortion

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  a woman gets an abortion.

  the baby is supposed to die because of the abortion but doesn’t.

  should that living baby be put to death or should the baby be given medical help to survive?.

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  OnTheWayOut

  Only 1 percent of all abortions occur after 21 weeks of pregnancy, according to the Guttmacher Institute, which supports abortion rights. Abortions during the final weeks are rarer still.

  Doctors' and abortion-rights groups say it is extremely unusual for live infants to be born during attempted late-term abortions, which they say usually occur when the baby is extremely deformed or deemed unable to survive after birth. In such cases, families sometimes decide they want to induce labor so they can spend time with the infant before it dies.
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  17

  Newly Free, Need Advice

  by HappyBlessedFree in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i stopped attending meetings about three months ago.

  after researching everything i could find on jehovahs witnesses (which is a lot) i can happily say i am awake and free.

  i was a baptized witness for over 25 year.

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  OnTheWayOut

  I almost said "then how come you aren't going to meetings then". But I didn't ! I am reading Steve Hassans book and I understand about cognitive dissonance.

  
  I left the JW's by fading away, but my wife remains active. I often want to point out hypocrisy where the wife is a weak witness, but it would only make her try harder to show me that the weakness was a mistake, and then she would overcome it. I don't want to make her a better witness by pointing out that she is not a good witness.

  Otherwise, I fully agree with john.prestor on page 1. Enjoy your child's birthday. Don't wait it out entirely for the sake of your husband, let the children start enjoying things properly, but do it in a way that will help your husband see what joy you had.
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  89

  Babies Who Are Not Dead From An Abortion

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  a woman gets an abortion.

  the baby is supposed to die because of the abortion but doesn’t.

  should that living baby be put to death or should the baby be given medical help to survive?.

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  OnTheWayOut

  It’s interesting that some of our liberal friends are keeping quiet on this subject. Hmmmm

  
  
  
  I first want to say that "Liberals" don't all nicely fit into a category of accepting and desiring abortion.
  
  I oppose abortion and think that better birth control needs to be widely accepted and taught. But the liberal in me recognizes that I don't get to choose for everyone and there are exceptions to all rules.
  
  Full-term abortion (well, nearly full term) is a tiny portion of abortions, and they are supposed to be done only when the fetus is not viable and/or the mother's life is in extreme danger. But as I type this, someone will go find a story about some case where they told the mother she was going to die and she did not, and has this wonderful son or daughter.
  
  So, like anything else, there will be those exceptions to the rule that these should not be done unless they are absolutely necessary.
  
  I am not going to produce a bunch of links because I don't like abortion and there will be links about exceptions to the rules that go the other way.
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  7

  New Boy only 3 weeks out, My Dedication

  by new boy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  this book is dedicated to james olson and robert stillman and the millions of other people, who have been victims of religious abuse.

  this book is dedicated to the thousands of people who have lost their parents, children and families members by way of the cruel practice of shunning.

  this book is for the thousands of suicide victims, people who could not live with the guilt and shame that the jehovah’s witnesses thought system has created for them.

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  OnTheWayOut

  Help us find your book.
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  22

  Introduction

  by Cerise in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  hello i am relatively new, reading a lot of experiences here for a while.

  i’m born in and baptized but i moved away from small town to a new congregation in big city so i have a good opportunity to fade now.

  all my good friends are worldly and my boyfriend.

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  OnTheWayOut

  If nobody really knows you and where you live, consider the full immediate disappearing instead of a drawn out fade.

  Feel free to live a normal worldly life then. The vast majority of people don't violate JW rules in public except smoking and doing holiday stuff.

  Don't smoke (it's bad for you anyway) in public and minimize your public participation in holidays. Also, be careful about your social media. Maybe use your fake persona to join any groups like you did here.

  I like the stumbled victim play, but I fully recommend you save it for a persistant elder. Prior to that point, I recommend just staying out of conversations with them. "I am fine, I will call you if I need you."