i first want to thank you all for your support over the past few days.
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/7/131534/1.ashx.
i did finally get a reply from my dad (after a week and a half) and i almost wish i hadn't.
((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Hugs))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) I completely understand and I am sorry you are hurting. When it is all said and done, it is their loss.
I had been trying for a time to not "shun" my mother back...I would leave messages about the baby, ect. I got NO response. Finally, I have given up the "fight" and if she ever comes to her senses, that is when I will show her I am Christian....by not holding it all against her. (Though I never see it happening)
haven't been on here for months and months .. .
completely lost and screwed up.. please don't be offended but some stuff on here does my head in .... .
.
You mentioned 3 wonderfull kids. They are your future and your present.
You have to think a-lot differently when you no longer feel like you "know" more than anyone else in the "world" knows. You have as much of a life than all of us do. It takes time to find your place...but, it does happen. On average, it takes 7 years to free yourself from a cult like mentality. That was true in my case. You can speed it up though by continueing to research things to find WHAT you believe.
The big thing that sunk in and changed my outlook was it is not about a certain belief system or religion....It is YOUR PERSONAL relationship with God and how it can affect your life.
Do not give up....many of us are where your at or have been there...or go back there every now and then.
haven't been on here for months and months .. .
completely lost and screwed up.. please don't be offended but some stuff on here does my head in .... .
.
I just read your previous posts and it sounds like you deal with things a-lot of us do. It is really hard to lose family members. (I even LEFT MY DAUGHTER back in that religion (Long story)) I feel like you do, I don't want to hate...I want to have peace in my heart and beloving towards people.
The one thing I HAD to do though is some councling. I really didn't think I needed it, but when I found out what I felt was NORMAL for someone who exits a cult, it made me feel a-lot better about myself. (I still have my moments...but less of them)
Also, I had to go on anti-depressants for awhile....to help me stay sane. Nothing wrong with that either.
What do you need us to do for you right now? Just listen or more?
haven't been on here for months and months .. .
completely lost and screwed up.. please don't be offended but some stuff on here does my head in .... .
.
What are you scared of in particular?
Sometimes I worry so much about things (or are scared of facing something) but, when it comes a-long...you get through it and it makes you stronger.
Is this all in relation to the JW's?
haven't been on here for months and months .. .
completely lost and screwed up.. please don't be offended but some stuff on here does my head in .... .
.
I can relate..It is a-lot to take in. Are you OK?
to me there is a definite difference in my generation and the one coming after me, when i graduated you basically had three choices.
military, college or a fulltime job which meant more than 40 and you were expected to grow up, today kids are seen as postponing this for years, it reminds me of the proverbs 29:21 kjv says .
21 he that delicately bringeth up his servant from a child shall have him become his son at the length.. when is it time to push the little birds from the nest and tell them to flap real hard?.
ABR.....It is time for tough love. It sounds like your parenting has been coming from "guilt" love. (ie....you feel bad for making him leave so you clean his new place that you paid for, when you know darn well he won't care or appreciate it) You really are not doing him any favors. He (as any person) is capable of getting up for a full time job and if he doesn't want to clean....he can live in his mess at his own place. (It is embarassing when you want to have friends over and your place is gross) He could even get a roomate if he needs to. If I were you I would STOP helping this momnent...and DO NOT FEEL GUILTY...or he will still have you in his (dirty, smelly) back pocket!
(All this applies unless you think he has a mental issue...then get him help before you get out of his back pocket)
i do not have any formal education in this area, and so do not know all the terms that go along with my situation, but will do the best i can to describe the confusion i am having.i was raised a jehovah's witness, yes i now realize it is a cult with c.for 39 years i was held captive in this destructive mind control destructive cult.i left and several years ago and so did my wife, she left with me even though many in the cult will let it split up their relationship rather than leave the deluded comfort of their fantasy world.both our parents were raised in this so called religion, as is the norm, once in you are not allowed to date any one outside of the cult, once in you will be excommunicated or as they call it disfellowshiped for any number of infractions, including celebrating any holiday,voting,smoking a cigarette,saying outloud you do not think jehovah's witness are gods sole channel of communication on earth.
once a jw you can be disfellowshiped for talking to,having dinner with, or in any way socializing with any former member who is now disfelowshipped including your family member,i.e.
brother,mother,sister,father, uncle ect.my wife's parents live apx.
I don't have any help to offer....It sounds like a really tough situation.....but, I have seen things similar on Oprah (OK, no one throw things at me!) It is a real disorder, and very hard to help with. From the stories I saw, the only way for the person to get better is to seek out help them selves.
I wish I knew more to tell you. The part about him having nothing to do with his kids and grandkids...but taking in others could be a part of the Cult mentality. My mom (who is an active JW) is like that. I guess if your dad never faced why he isn't a JW, he could still have it all still in his head and in a way has disconnected from his family....and maybe preparing for the big "A" by storing things up(In a very unreasonable way)
I am sorry for your situation. I wish you all the best in your family life!
well, since i da'd my parents have shunned me.
they have however replied to my emails inquiring as to their health and such.
every few months i send them an email telling them how i am and asking them how they are.
(((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))) That is just plain shit*y of them. It is not fair at all....and I wish there was something we could do about it.
BTW......My hubby was about in tears last night after the game. He loves the Tar Heals, and that game was hard to watch. He had to be alone a while after that one.
My heart goes out to you!
children, the memorial is on monday, april 2, 2007 at sundown.
please find a kingdom hall and attend.
love ya, gary here is my step dads invitation to the memorial.
Thank you for the invite dad. I know you love us and are trying to encourage us all. I will not be going to that memorial though....and it is because of my research on the Bible. Here is why: The Bible speaks of Jesus as our mediator. The society says that he is ONLY the mediator for the 144,000. I have chosen to believe the Bible over the society of imperfect men. Here is what the Bible says...(From the New World Translation) 1 I therefore exhort, first of all, that supplications, prayers, intercessions, offerings of thanks, be made concerning all sorts of men, 2 concerning kings and all those who are in high station; in order that we may go on leading a calm and quiet life with full godly devotion and seriousness. 3 This is fine and acceptable in the sight of our Savior, God, 4 whose will is that all sorts of men should be saved and come to an accurate knowledge of truth. 5 For there isone God, and one mediator between God and men, a man, Christ Jesus, 6 who gave himself a corresponding ransom for all The society puts it differently... "So in this strict Biblical sense Jesus is the mediator only for anointed Christians The great crowd of other sheep that is forming today is not in that new covenant. However by associating with the little flock of those yet in that covenant they come under the benefits that flow from that new covenant." WT 4/1/7
"They recognize that they are not spiritual Israelites in the new covenant mediated by Jesus Christ." WT 11/15/79 "To keep in relationship with Our Savior, God, the great crowd needs to remain united with the remnant of spiritual Israelites." WT 11/15/79 Love you, Lyndi
children, the memorial is on monday, april 2, 2007 at sundown.
please find a kingdom hall and attend.
love ya, gary here is my step dads invitation to the memorial.
Children, the Memorial is on Monday, April 2, 2007 at sundown. Please find a Kingdom Hall and attend. Love ya, Gary Here is my step dads invitation to the memorial. He sent it to me, my siblings (copied in my du(M)b mom) and some of my youngest sisters friends. Can't you feel the heart felt love?? LOL! Here is my response: (I wanted to say been there, done that....got the t-shirt, but I decieded to try to be respectfull....It isn't as fun!) I sent the response to all that he invited. (Next page down)
