I don't like to refer to my past too much, but in this case, I will.
I was in Gilead class 119. Born in. Lost my family I loved while I was in, then, when I discovered as an elder that what was taught and how people were treated didn't match up, I was shunned. I left of my own accord. I wasn't kicked out. I decided to start anew based on what I saw and what I learned....
I have no agenda. It's been 10 years. Your decisions are your own. Having said that, I absolutely empathize with what you are seeing right now. The decisions are never just logical, they are also emotional, and they do cover all things spiritual.
Towards the end, after Gilead and when I came back from Cameroon, I would go knock on a door, and when it seemed appropriate, I would ask the householder what they thought. And I just listened. It was refreshing. I thanked them for sharing.
My one thought for you is that whatever reasons you see and you think are good enough. JW's are conditioned to look for "the truth". Maybe you're looking for a reason, someone else's reason, and maybe that is your thing. If your thing is to do it your way, that is just as valid. When I talked with people at their doors before I left, I was impressed with how developed most people's "think for yourself" muscle was compared to mine. 10 years later, my own thoughts, what I am, is the only truly unique thing I can offer the world. It's the only thing any of us can offer.
JW's unwittingly (or wittingly) took away your ability to feel good about being yourself. Think about that. You are an individual. Except to JW's. Whatever your first name was, they replaced it with "Sister"...
Be you. Feel good. That doesn't mean to do whatever you want, but deep down, you already know your own mind and who you are. Explore that. Being you and finding you is much more important a pursuit than figuring out why JW's are the way they are.... IMO