Nope. You can't reason with someone who doesn't want to...
AllTimeJeff
JoinedPosts by AllTimeJeff
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43
Did Ray Franz Help You To Get Out of “The Truth”?
by minimus ini sneakily read his books at work.
it was written in such a way that no one could accuse him of being another bitter old apostate.. once it registered in my brain, especially after reading the second book, i knew i had to get out!.
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AllTimeJeff
Final nail in the coffin. ;)
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AllTimeJeff
If you read my 1914 joke in the voice of, say, Dennis Miller, it's much funnier... :) -
18
What's The Point?
by AllTimeJeff init's been 12 years since i submitted my resignation letter, and stopped playing by their rules.. in a spurt of manic rationality, i blew up the bridge, sky high.
knowing that the diseased organ would need to be forever removed, away from anything remotely functional in my mind, body, and soul.
lest i be tempted to return.... so, i left.
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AllTimeJeff
Menrov, that is exactly why I had to move on from the first marriage. The JW infection was too deep and ingrained. I would have had to commit a good chunk of my life to trying to wake her up, and I needed every last spare gallon of gas I had to spare to spend on my recovery.
Blondie, fading is it's own thing. I didn't get it when I first left, but I do now. JW's sniff out inactivity very well, since their noses are so high in the air, but it never helps the feeling it puts in you.
Phizzy, I am happy for you. I hope everyone is able to experience healing on some level, as soon as possible. We all deserve to be happy, and to know ourselves. (and to know that our first name isn't "brother" or "sister" lol)
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18
What's The Point?
by AllTimeJeff init's been 12 years since i submitted my resignation letter, and stopped playing by their rules.. in a spurt of manic rationality, i blew up the bridge, sky high.
knowing that the diseased organ would need to be forever removed, away from anything remotely functional in my mind, body, and soul.
lest i be tempted to return.... so, i left.
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AllTimeJeff
Good thought Waton. But actually, the best therapy is, therapy. ;)
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30
Our daughter was free to make her own choice.
by StephaneLaliberte inwhen eloise dupuis gave birth to her son in 2016, there were complications where a blood transfusion would have saved her live.
however, she refused and died; to the horror of the medical staff and the entire province of quebec.. two years later, there was a change in politics and the topic came back up in the media.
the parents of eloise dupuis, obviously exhausted by the media coverage, wrote a comment to a well known news paper in quebec.
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AllTimeJeff
Just a comment, not trying to join the conversation per se...
Let's just reframe the arguement: JW parents want the religious "freedom" to choose and deny life saving medicine to their ill children. Ironically, that choice was never their's. But that is how insidious the GB is. It's their choice, clunking around in your head, while you dream of a paradise in khaki's waiting in line at the Assembly Hall for your child whom you denied blood treatment, to be resurrected. Because without that "hope" no parent EVER does this...
Let that sink in. Because that's the trick.
Any other argument about anything else is crap because A CHILD UNDER THE CONTROL OF A CULT AND CULT LED PARENTS WILL DIE OR PERMANENTLY HARMED.
Whether it's ostracism or straight up bullying, It's still straight up ignorance. At the very least, the Governing Body should disband all HLC's and allow their flock to lie to them about blood. At least they'll be alive...
Legally, the Governing Body has no choice but to triple down. The first admission that someone can take blood, and thousands of dead people who could have lived will be legally on their heads. And there isn't enough property to sell in Brooklyn Heights to pay for that.
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AllTimeJeff
They still doing 1914? That aged well....
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My fade. Phase 2.
by Beth Sarim inabout to move from ''irregular'' status to ''inactive''.. after 6 months of not handing a field service report since the end of june, i will be recognized as ''inactive''.
there could be 'questions' coming my way.. after having read ''crisis of conscience'' last spring, i could no longer ''actively'' preach or believe the wbts conscientiously.
i could no longer fake hours by putting the 'slip' in the field service box.
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AllTimeJeff
I was an elder and Gilead stooge, so when I read CoC, I instantly recognized it as 100% true. That was the final nail in a mostly finished coffin.
Whatever game you play to fade and seem to stay in, play it well. You don't owe them a thing. And if by chance, the game is claiming too much of you, don't be afraid to consider just flat out resigning.
Your fade will ultimately depend on your local elders and local JW culture. Which does vary greatly. Otherwise, best of luck to you!
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18
What's The Point?
by AllTimeJeff init's been 12 years since i submitted my resignation letter, and stopped playing by their rules.. in a spurt of manic rationality, i blew up the bridge, sky high.
knowing that the diseased organ would need to be forever removed, away from anything remotely functional in my mind, body, and soul.
lest i be tempted to return.... so, i left.
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AllTimeJeff
It's been 12 years since I submitted my resignation letter, and stopped playing by their rules.
In a spurt of manic rationality, I blew up the bridge, sky high. Knowing that the diseased organ would need to be forever removed, away from anything remotely functional in my mind, body, and soul. Lest I be tempted to return...
So, I left. And you did too, or are trying to leave. Or have left in mind and soul, but the body has to be there for all kinds of reasons faders must endure.
I feel motivated to write this because I believe, even if it is on some very small level, that the desire to leave comes back to the most basic of human drives. To find and have true purpose and meaning. To be autonomous, even though anyone who leaves a cult, or wants to, is amazingly ill equipped at first to be autonomous. And that, is truly courageous.
Watching Leah Remini's interview with those brave people who left our fruity little cult reminded me of the courage it is to expand your elbows in this world, and claim just the space you need to breathe. And boy, does the GB work like hell to trick you into thinking you shouldn't be thinking... You can't take a mental breath when the WTBTS wants to claim every last minute you spend thinking about the next FS interaction, meeting, comment, and of course, all those "nasty" thoughts that only YHWH can see...
It takes courage to call bull shit. But what then?
The key is being healthy. The key is thinking healthy.
I write this because I want to plead with anyone who struggles with distorted images of themselves to get help. Real therapy. It doesn't have to involve medication, though it might. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is great, and can help someone reframe the crap you learned, and how you view yourself, into something that is truly whole, and balanced.
Remember, especially if you were a born in, you likely have decades of conditioning. It is the last thing from a death sentence, but it does require a commitment to (as Yoda put it) "unlearn what you have learned"... ;)
If we can get as many exiting, recovering, ex JW's to work on their mental health, then we win. YOU win. Because in the final analysis, the only real power that the Governing Body ever had on you, was the real estate space they counted on taking up between your ears.
Evict them. Replace it with true mental help.
As a start, because many exiting JW's can't afford real therapy at first, try books like "Feeling Good" by David Burns. (the dude is a real mental health professional, not a snake oil salesman "life coach") Just try it. Work through it. And know that you will get there.
What's the point? That you win, and the Governing Body loses. The football field is in your mind. Take it back, and it really doesn't matter about them anymore. YOU WIN YOU BACK. Go get it!
Much love to all. From someone who has the scars to show for it, and the smile at the end.... :)
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20
Disassociation experiences please
by UnshackleTheChains inhi everyone.. i would love to collate the experiences of those who decided to disassociate.
the reason i am asking this question is that i have been in turmoil for a very long time as to whether i remain a fader or whether to bring closure on my membership with the watchtower organisation.. it is for this reason i would like to read about some of the experiences of those on this forum who went down the route of disassociation.
if could answer the following.
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AllTimeJeff
Hi there. This is a pet peeve thing with me. I don't use their language. I resigned from their cult. They chose to disassociate with me.
How long did it take you to decide to disassociate?
After coming back from my missionary trip to Cameroon, I decided to leave. I stayed long enough to see if my ex-wife was worth trying to rescue. I quickly enough realized that she wasn't.
How has this impacted on you?
I have 10 years of posts you can look up on the effect it had on me. But it has been worth it big time. I have a life of my choosing, hard fought but well worth it.
Has your mental health in any way been affected since you disassociated? Eg if being shunned by family.
Only at the funeral of my grandfather, which I attended at a KH and caused a 10 minute paralyzing panic attack. Then I got pissed and walked out defiantly before the song. Everyone's mileage will differ on this, but my JW family isn't the lighthouse for my mental health.
Do any of your current JW relatives associate with you? And if so to what degree?
None.
Do you feel your life is better now that you are completely free of the watchtower?
HELL YES.
Do you ever get panic attacks about Armageddon or that you left "the truth"?
No. I had a panic attack before I married my ex JW wife, and at my grandfathers funeral. That was about it.